Halloween and bailing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At what age do people just start bailing on their friends on Halloween? My kid has had plans with another kid for ToTing for weeks and 2 seconds ago the parents share that the kid decided to go ToTing with another group instead. I'm most annoyed because more notice would have been nice and considerate. We have turned down other invites. They are 8 and 7. How about teaching your kids to honor commitments?

Maybe your kids are lame. Grow a pair

Op here. Well he did lose his grandma who used to live with us this past summer and is dyslexic? But I’ll pass along your message.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate this kind of thing. Ds wants to tot with a group that is more risk taking. I want him to tot with an old friend that I trust way more. I can't overrule ds' plans he's been making for weeks because of my own preferences. He's too old for my social engineering now

That’s reasonable. But did you bail? If not you’re good. If you did bail, did you acknowledge it was a bail? If so you’re good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate this kind of thing. Ds wants to tot with a group that is more risk taking. I want him to tot with an old friend that I trust way more. I can't overrule ds' plans he's been making for weeks because of my own preferences. He's too old for my social engineering now

That’s reasonable. But did you bail? If not you’re good. If you did bail, did you acknowledge it was a bail? If so you’re good.

Did not bail, I would have dug my heels in on that but more out of selfish desires. I think it's OK to bail a certain amount of time away from the event at those young ages. Less than a week is too close though!

[Anonymous]

Rudeness knows no bounds. I remember many years ago my daughter was planning her costume with her neighborhood BFF. About 2 days before Halloween said BFF said to my daughter “I don’t think I’m going to ToT, I’m just going to stay in and watch movies.” Fine. My DD decided to hand out candy with me. Well whom should come along? Her BFF with ANOTHER group of kids from her school in coordinated costumes - they had clearly been planning this for a while. My DD was devastated. She eventually dumped this girl (rightfully so).

Some people are just a$$holes. Find another group and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At what age do people just start bailing on their friends on Halloween? My kid has had plans with another kid for ToTing for weeks and 2 seconds ago the parents share that the kid decided to go ToTing with another group instead. I'm most annoyed because more notice would have been nice and considerate. We have turned down other invites. They are 8 and 7. How about teaching your kids to honor commitments?

Maybe your kids are lame. Grow a pair

Ugh, stay in the DMV, the city you deserve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rudeness knows no bounds. I remember many years ago my daughter was planning her costume with her neighborhood BFF. About 2 days before Halloween said BFF said to my daughter “I don’t think I’m going to ToT, I’m just going to stay in and watch movies.” Fine. My DD decided to hand out candy with me. Well whom should come along? Her BFF with ANOTHER group of kids from her school in coordinated costumes - they had clearly been planning this for a while. My DD was devastated. She eventually dumped this girl (rightfully so).

Some people are just a$$holes. Find another group and move on.

They came to your house!?!

Wow

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Rudeness knows no bounds. I remember many years ago my daughter was planning her costume with her neighborhood BFF. About 2 days before Halloween said BFF said to my daughter “I don’t think I’m going to ToT, I’m just going to stay in and watch movies.” Fine. My DD decided to hand out candy with me. Well whom should come along? Her BFF with ANOTHER group of kids from her school in coordinated costumes - they had clearly been planning this for a while. My DD was devastated. She eventually dumped this girl (rightfully so).

Some people are just a$$holes. Find another group and move on.

They came to your house!?!

Wow

Classless

[Anonymous]

I think OP should reply and say Larlo will be very sad, he was so looking forward to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no age when bailing is courteous, OP. That family is a bit rude, and next time, I hope you won't make firm plans with them.

I’d never make plans with them again.

Plus 1

Never ok to bail.
The parent Should have asked your son to join them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Rudeness knows no bounds. I remember many years ago my daughter was planning her costume with her neighborhood BFF. About 2 days before Halloween said BFF said to my daughter “I don’t think I’m going to ToT, I’m just going to stay in and watch movies.” Fine. My DD decided to hand out candy with me. Well whom should come along? Her BFF with ANOTHER group of kids from her school in coordinated costumes - they had clearly been planning this for a while. My DD was devastated. She eventually dumped this girl (rightfully so).

Some people are just a$$holes. Find another group and move on.

They came to your house!?!

Wow

No. They skipped out house when they saw me and DD sitting outside. But we saw them. And the mom and BFF’s sibling. We typically hand out about 400/450 pieces of candy (our block is very popular and we usually block it off to traffic). They clearly skipped us when they knew DD was there. It took my DD a while to get over that. It was rough.

[Anonymous]

Hm, my kids go trick or treating with each other. They don't need to be part of a large group. I rarely see huge groups trick or treating - where do you live?

[Anonymous]

People are azzzholes and don’t give a shit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ If you want to be bold send a reply like “Kind of late to change plans! Can [my kid] join the other group? Don’t want her to be disappointed about having to ToT alone”

If your neighborhood does something, and even if it doesn’t, just do your own thing. I sent something like above once- not the “kind of late” part but something like “bigger group sounds fun-would it be ok if Larlo joined too?” I quickly regretted sending when my asking went from the one parent to others and then to kids that my kid wasn’t invited until mom forced them… at time asked I didn’t think was big deal, but learned lesson hard way.

Something similar happened to us. We ran into the new group that bailed on us, my kids joined them but it was super awkward with all the parents because they were going to dinner right after together at someone's house and did not want us around. I should have steered us to a different street.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Rudeness knows no bounds. I remember many years ago my daughter was planning her costume with her neighborhood BFF. About 2 days before Halloween said BFF said to my daughter “I don’t think I’m going to ToT, I’m just going to stay in and watch movies.” Fine. My DD decided to hand out candy with me. Well whom should come along? Her BFF with ANOTHER group of kids from her school in coordinated costumes - they had clearly been planning this for a while. My DD was devastated. She eventually dumped this girl (rightfully so).

Some people are just a$$holes. Find another group and move on.

They came to your house!?!

Wow

No. They skipped out house when they saw me and DD sitting outside. But we saw them. And the mom and BFF’s sibling. We typically hand out about 400/450 pieces of candy (our block is very popular and we usually block it off to traffic). They clearly skipped us when they knew DD was there. It took my DD a while to get over that. It was rough.

Was your DD at a private? Private school makes ToT much tougher

[Anonymous]

It’s very rude of the other family. Once you make a commitment, you stick with it, even if something “better” comes along. If it were me I would simply reply “ok” and never plan anything with them again.