We make $260k combined….why do I feel like we have no money?

Anonymous
Childcare
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think your PITI is a little high given your situation. Any possibility of downsizing? (We have a similar HHI and pay about $1200 less per mo, for comparison.)

Childcare costs, obviously, are high.

Your utilities seem high. What is the breakdown of those?


They would be spending money if they move and likely not worth it.

Utilities may be a little high but whatever.

The big issue is the CHILDCARE. That is why you feel that way.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Net combined income (after insurance and taxes and retirement contributions): $11,000

Monthly Expenses:
Mortgage PITI: $3450
Childcare: $3500
Utilities: average $750 (electric, water, Internet)
Phone bills: $150
Insurance/gas/car maintenance: $400
Medication/Therapies/medical costs: $800
Food/toiletries: $1000

This leaves us with less than $900/month to cover things like home maintenance, car repairs, clothes, haircuts, travel, incidentals, kids activities, gifts, savings, and debt payments (we have no debt but mortgage and a 0% credit card that has $12k on it).

I’m so frustrated. I feel like we can’t afford so many things I want (a dog, a 2nd car, a vacation, a personal computer, a bike). We have nothing saved for college. We are way behind on retirement. We share one car.

We have 2 kids but one of them has significant special needs so our childcare/medical expenses are unlikely to drop dramatically for at least another 3-5 years.

Any tips or commiseration?


You are living above your means and your child care and housing expenses are very high. Same with your utilities. We make far less than you and are comfortable but the big difference is child care and housing. Our mortgage is $1500 less than yours. Our therapy expenses were higher though.
Anonymous
Op here.

Utilities do vary. We have an all electric house.

Electricity: $450/month
Water: $150/month
Internet: $150/month

If I’m totally honest, in the summer our electricity is actually even higher…..
Anonymous
Childcare and therapies are costly. I’d downsize on the home to have a cheaper mortgage. Hopefully you’ll make more in the future.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Op here.

Utilities do vary. We have an all electric house.

Electricity: $450/month
Water: $150/month
Internet: $150/month

If I’m totally honest, in the summer our electricity is actually even higher…..


Have you thought about solar panels?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think your PITI is a little high given your situation. Any possibility of downsizing? (We have a similar HHI and pay about $1200 less per mo, for comparison.)

Childcare costs, obviously, are high.

Your utilities seem high. What is the breakdown of those?


They would be spending money if they move and likely not worth it.

Utilities may be a little high but whatever.

The big issue is the CHILDCARE. That is why you feel that way.


Depends on their equity. They could make a profit.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op here.

Utilities do vary. We have an all electric house.

Electricity: $450/month
Water: $150/month
Internet: $150/month

If I’m totally honest, in the summer our electricity is actually even higher…..


Have you thought about solar panels?


Op here. We looked into them and they would help. But we didn’t do it because we need a new roof first. And our regulatory environment is pretty unfriendly towards them. We are only allowed to generate 90% of our electricity, and selling back to the grid is not really a thing.

When we priced it out, it was still gonna be $30k out of pocket (AFTER the tax break! And this was just before the pandemic. It’s probably more now). And we just don’t have the money for it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Childcare and therapies are costly. I’d downsize on the home to have a cheaper mortgage. Hopefully you’ll make more in the future.


Op here. The problem is we bought a fixer upper in April 2020, and prices have exploded in our area. Our interest rate is super low, and meanwhile prices are much higher. A downgrade into a smaller house with a higher interest rate only helps if we make a massive downgrade. I’m concerned it would mean moving out of our current school district and away from our medical/therapy team/work.
Anonymous
On the Frugalwoods website they have a lot of family case studies where people write in for feedback. Maybe you could get some ideas there. I think if you took one category per month and made a one-time effort to find savings, you might free up $100 a month or so. That can go towards your CC debt and it'll be paid off all the sooner. I know this sounds like a bummer, but it might just be your situation.
Anonymous
OP, what options do you have for higher salaries? Moving is expensive, especially with interest rates as high as they are now. Childcare will go away, but not soon enough, it sounds like. I think your PITI isn’t bad, but that, combined with childcare + health needs, etc., is a lot.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:On the Frugalwoods website they have a lot of family case studies where people write in for feedback. Maybe you could get some ideas there. I think if you took one category per month and made a one-time effort to find savings, you might free up $100 a month or so. That can go towards your CC debt and it'll be paid off all the sooner. I know this sounds like a bummer, but it might just be your situation.


Op here. Thanks! I will check it out!!
Anonymous
I don’t understand why your potions high when you live in the desert
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP, what options do you have for higher salaries? Moving is expensive, especially with interest rates as high as they are now. Childcare will go away, but not soon enough, it sounds like. I think your PITI isn’t bad, but that, combined with childcare + health needs, etc., is a lot.


Op here. I think we could do better. I’m pushing DH hard to see if he could land something higher paying. He’s in a hot industry so I believe he could find something higher paying. He’s applied and gotten interest and even offers, but they all entailed moving and my job is not remote friendly so he had to turn them down.
Anonymous
Is there a way for one of you to go part time or flex your schedule that would enable you to cut back on childcare expenses? Eventually your kids will both be in school, so if one of you starts working early in the morning and the other works late, would that help? Going through early intervention might help your child get into free preschool too.
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