We make $260k combined….why do I feel like we have no money?

[Anonymous]

Net combined income (after insurance and taxes and retirement contributions): $11,000

Monthly Expenses:
Mortgage PITI: $3450
Childcare: $3500
Utilities: average $750 (electric, water, Internet)
Phone bills: $150
Insurance/gas/car maintenance: $400
Medication/Therapies/medical costs: $800
Food/toiletries: $1000

This leaves us with less than $900/month to cover things like home maintenance, car repairs, clothes, haircuts, travel, incidentals, kids activities, gifts, savings, and debt payments (we have no debt but mortgage and a 0% credit card that has $12k on it).

I’m so frustrated. I feel like we can’t afford so many things I want (a dog, a 2nd car, a vacation, a personal computer, a bike). We have nothing saved for college. We are way behind on retirement. We share one car.

We have 2 kids but one of them has significant special needs so our childcare/medical expenses are unlikely to drop dramatically for at least another 3-5 years.

Any tips or commiseration?

[Anonymous]

Because of the childcare. Does one of you make most of that money and the other can stay home to eliminate that?

[Anonymous]

When will the childcare end?

[Anonymous]

Your utilities are high. How do those break down? Get rid of cable if you haven’t already.

[Anonymous]

What is the 12k cc from?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your utilities are high. How do those break down? Get rid of cable if you haven’t already.

Op here. We don’t have cable. Our internet, water, and electricity costs are high because we live in the desert and require super high speed Internet because of DH’s job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is the 12k cc from?

Op here. It’s medical debt and travel costs for our child with special needs (he has a rare condition that requires some travel for treatment).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because of the childcare. Does one of you make most of that money and the other can stay home to eliminate that?

Op here. We are pretty evenly split (I make $140k, DH makes $120k).

[Anonymous]

Is the $150/month fir phone just cell or is it a landline as well?
If it's just cell, try a low cost service like Ting or Mint.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When will the childcare end?

Op here. I’m not sure. I hope in another 2-3 years it will drop down, but not to zero. I’m not sure when it will actually be zero or less than $500, maybe in 5-8 years?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is the $150/month fir phone just cell or is it a landline as well?
If it's just cell, try a low cost service like Ting or Mint.

Op here, it’s 2 cell phone lines. I’ll check out those options.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, OP. Sometimes kids are just really expensive and it can seriously impact your finances.

I think you might feel better if you got rid of the debt, even though it's at 0% (for now). That at least is one monthly cost you can eliminate, then going forward you can spend that money on something more enjoyable. I would check out some frugality blogs and see where you can trim your budget *temporarily* to offload this debt. I know it sounds like a bummer when you're already feeling down, but you'll be so happy if you can clear it.

[Anonymous]

Are you able to refi your mortgage?

[Anonymous]

I think your PITI is a little high given your situation. Any possibility of downsizing? (We have a similar HHI and pay about $1200 less per mo, for comparison.)

Childcare costs, obviously, are high.

Your utilities seem high. What is the breakdown of those?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you able to refi your mortgage?

Op here. I don’t think it would make sense since interest rates are so high. Our interest rate is 3.5%. We do have $400k in equity, though.