Why am I not getting any hits on apps

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get some male input on your profile and the photos. Head shots and one full length my look too staid.

I am staid. I’m not looking for hookups. I am feral in bed with someone I love and trust, but that takes intimacy and time to find out.

Do your pictures look boring? Are their any pictures showing you doing anything like hiking etc.

One skiing, one at the beach, one with a glass of wine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Often wonder why people "think" they are pretty. If you're pretty (and at age 49 you're "old" for most people in the dating pool, you'd know it. But, are you forgetting you are almost 50???

50 is not dead. Plenty of women are still pretty at 50.

[Anonymous]

I’d be concerned what your profile says if all else is good and you’re actually attractive. Does it mention politics? Religion? Do you talk about certain physical characteristics you’re looking for in a man? For example: I like men taller than me (5’10”), fit/muscular, bearded, bleeding heart liberal, no triumpers, financially stable, able to travel all over the world whenever I feel like it. Etc etc. I avoid these people like the plague. 50 yr old single man here.

[Anonymous]

Why apps? I’m 50, fit and very pretty. I get hit on in real life all of the time. If never do online dating. Never.

I assume you live in the DMV and not in some small isolated town. There are people everywhere.

[Anonymous]

Too old for the apps you are on most likely. Some really are just pure hook up websites for the young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d be concerned what your profile says if all else is good and you’re actually attractive. Does it mention politics? Religion? Do you talk about certain physical characteristics you’re looking for in a man? For example: I like men taller than me (5’10”), fit/muscular, bearded, bleeding heart liberal, no triumpers, financially stable, able to travel all over the world whenever I feel like it. Etc etc. I avoid these people like the plague. 50 yr old single man here.

Not at all! Says my profession and interests. I am actually pretty quirky but tried to keep it mainstream not edgy. One of the questions was “who pays on the first date?” I wanted to answer “the 1%, of course” but deleted that prompt instead : ).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why apps? I’m 50, fit and very pretty. I get hit on in real life all of the time. If never do online dating. Never.

I assume you live in the DMV and not in some small isolated town. There are people everywhere.

I am almost never hit on in real life either. Where are you hit on/meeting people? I think I give off an intimidating vibe, but I am totally not intimidating in my own mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Too old for the apps you are on most likely. Some really are just pure hook up websites for the young.

What are the right apps for this age? My age range is 43-63.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Too old for the apps you are on most likely. Some really are just pure hook up websites for the young.

What are the right apps for this age? My age range is 43-63.

Just to save yourself time, make sure that's what your age range is listed as on the apps so that men outside it don't even hit your purview.

Beyond that, you need a male friend to give you honest feedback. This may not be the case, but right off the top I can say to delete any headshot that is similar to the kind you would put on LinkedIn.

Others may disagree, but I include that I have children in my profile just to save everyone time. Springing after someone has taken the time to arrange and go on a first date seems awful to me. I don't like wasting my time or theirs.

Beyond that, you don't need a lot of hits. Just one good one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 49, white, tall, thin, divorced with one kid and pretty with a good job, and the only hits I get are from guys in their 20s assuming I am easy. I am looking forward a LTR. Photos are good, mostly face shots with one full length fully clothed. Am I just too old?

Can you post a profile review on reddit and paste the link here? You can redact the name and/or face-what are your words? https://www.reddit.com/r/hingeapp/

[Anonymous]

“I’m white and I still can’t get a man! Help!”
A person casually includes being white as a positive attribute on posts like this, everyone nods along sympathetically, and then acts like white privilege is not a major feature of their lives. It reminds me of the post from the mom worried that her child got a C in math, who casually included that her child is white, as if it was especially worrisome that a white child would struggle in math. It’s the surprise that whiteness isn’t making the aspect of life easy, in a world that denies white privilege, for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: “I’m white and I still can’t get a man! Help!”
A person casually includes being white as a positive attribute on posts like this, everyone nods along sympathetically, and then acts like white privilege is not a major feature of their lives. It reminds me of the post from the mom worried that her child got a C in math, who casually included that her child is white, as if it was especially worrisome that a white child would struggle in math. It’s the surprise that whiteness isn’t making the aspect of life easy, in a world that denies white privilege, for me.

I’m the OP, and I am aware of the sensitivity but I do not consider it a “positive” and that is not why I included it. Rather, we frequently have women of color on here describing how hard it can be to date for various reasons and I included my race because I am facing a different demographic from someone who might for instance been specifically seeking a professional man who is black or brown, which would significantly narrow their pool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: “I’m white and I still can’t get a man! Help!”
A person casually includes being white as a positive attribute on posts like this, everyone nods along sympathetically, and then acts like white privilege is not a major feature of their lives. It reminds me of the post from the mom worried that her child got a C in math, who casually included that her child is white, as if it was especially worrisome that a white child would struggle in math. It’s the surprise that whiteness isn’t making the aspect of life easy, in a world that denies white privilege, for me.

Huh? Like a white woman cannot possibly have trouble dating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d be concerned what your profile says if all else is good and you’re actually attractive. Does it mention politics? Religion? Do you talk about certain physical characteristics you’re looking for in a man? For example: I like men taller than me (5’10”), fit/muscular, bearded, bleeding heart liberal, no triumpers, financially stable, able to travel all over the world whenever I feel like it. Etc etc. I avoid these people like the plague. 50 yr old single man here.

Usually women with those long lists are 75 pounds overweight, with purple hair.

[Anonymous]

I also noticed how OP included white.

Why?