Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!

[Anonymous]

Alexandra

[Anonymous]

Elizabeth (nn Lizzie)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Elizabeth (nn Lizzie)

(Cats: Bert, Max, Dora)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Zahra
Malcolm

You are a Black Muslim family who re-located to the DC area from San Francisco for your husband's teaching position at American. Both kids have had a difficult transition to the area and actually so have you. People aren't as friendly, aren't as crunchy, and aren't as hip as your old pals back in California. Zahra is a little mother hen, constantly monitoring Malcolm, gently teasing and cajoling him to do what ever she desires. Luckily, Malcolm is laid back and adores his big sis. They have become closer as a result of the move and you hope that they will always have a strong connection unlike your strained relationship with your older sister. You and your husband are still very much in love and you cherish any snippets of time that you get alone.

Pretty darn close! NYC transplants, I teach, Malcolm is due in a few weeks, and yes, my DH and I are very much in love.

[Anonymous]

Do me!!

McKenna
Annika
Jack

[Anonymous]

Twins- James and Ryan

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Alexandra

Alexandra. Not Alex. Not Lexie. Not Xandra. Not Allie. Always Alexandra. A name you chose because it sounded elegant, chic, and trendy. The problem is that you are constantly having to remind people, especially your in-laws to call her Alexandra. You wish your mom had been more diligent about nipping the nicknaming in the bud and hate the nickname that has stuck with you for all of these years. You are determined not to let the same thing happen with your sweet girl. Little do you know but in about ten years she will refuse to respond to you unless you use the nickname she will receive at camp: "Al" and occasionally "Big Al". That sweet dainty pixie of yours will grow up to be a star softball player and will end up bringing her girlfriend to prom, another popular jockette at their exclusive boarding school. It will break your heart until you realize that you don't want to lose her and you will quickly embrace Al and her gal-pals. You will also be secretly relieved that you don't have to worry about teen pregnancies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Zahra
Malcolm

You are a Black Muslim family who re-located to the DC area from San Francisco for your husband's teaching position at American. Both kids have had a difficult transition to the area and actually so have you. People aren't as friendly, aren't as crunchy, and aren't as hip as your old pals back in California. Zahra is a little mother hen, constantly monitoring Malcolm, gently teasing and cajoling him to do what ever she desires. Luckily, Malcolm is laid back and adores his big sis. They have become closer as a result of the move and you hope that they will always have a strong connection unlike your strained relationship with your older sister. You and your husband are still very much in love and you cherish any snippets of time that you get alone.

Pretty darn close! NYC transplants, I teach, Malcolm is due in a few weeks, and yes, my DH and I are very much in love.

Glad I got some things right Congrats and good luck with Malcom's arrival. I love your kids names and think it is sweet that you and your hubby are still very much in love.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Elizabeth (nn Lizzie)

(Cats: Bert, Max, Dora)

If you could, you would live on a little farm out in the Shenandoah Valley where you could have chickens, goats, and a large garden patch. But for right now, you and Lizzie are quite content in Takoma Park with your three fat and happy cats. You had Bert (poor Ernie passed away three years ago) and Max before Lizzie's arrival, but Dora is fairly young and was named after Lizzie's favorite tv star. You enjoy felting, composting, protesting, and pickling. You have had an interesting dating history and think you may have finally found the right guy but are waiting to move further ahead until you see how your family responds to him at the upcoming family reunion in South Carolina. Your Ganny is a pretty accurate judge of character and you are so relieved you listened to her about that boyfriend who had his own lawn care business. That marriage really would have been disaster, especially after you discovered that Round Up in his garage. Lizzie seems to adore Jox and you can already imagine them manning the farm stand in front of your future Virginia farmhouse...your curly-headed girl with your dreadlocked man, it's a heartwarming scene. Lizzie takes after you: compassionate, friendly, and a true advocate for animals and disadvantaged vegetables (seriously, why don't more people like boiled peanuts? cabbage? and curly endive?).

[Anonymous]

Silas

[Anonymous]

Andrew
Luke
Lauren
Madeline

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do me!!

McKenna
Annika
Jack

McKenna and Annika are thirteen year old twins who share a passion for field hockey, neon blue nail polish, and the same fourteen year old boy who lives down the street. When they were younger you enjoyed dressing them in identical smocked dresses and frilly bloomers with their monograms on the bum. They quickly expressed their dissatisfaction with your fashion choices and went in very different directions. McKenna going for the more sporty togs and Annika pushing the limits on the skanky side of things. Jack is now the one you get to dress and you are pleasantly surprised to find that you love little boy's clothing...the monogrammed John-Johns, crisp little linen outfits from Janie and Jack, plaids, and gingham, tiny Polo shirts, and all of those adorable caps to top off any outfit. You happily spend hours attempting to remove grass stains, muddy marks, and dog poop while strategically planning how you will outfit him for the next season. For your own wardrobe, you turn to Boden and Banana Republic which you accent with your latest Vera Bradley acquisition and a shiny new pair of pastel flats. You proudly live in a gated community in Vienna and you like to pretend that you come from old Southern money, but your family was barely middle class and you have cousins with some hideous hick/nicknames. Your husband is balding and you reassure him (and yourself) that it is sexy, but it isn't. You have a lot of Pampered Chef products, but rarely use them. You are a sucker for Christmas movies, Hallmark commercials, and baby toes, but you are very happy to finally be past the diaper stage with Jack. You are good at telling jokes, making fancy cocktails, and giving people compliments which means you get lots of party invitations and you rarely turn them down. After your children are grown and your husband has retired, you plan on becoming one of those cruising couples or perhaps one of those golfing couples or perhaps just dressing like those types of couples.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Silas

Flight of the Concords was one of your favorite tv shows. (Why did it have to end?) The Moth is your favorite podcast (and you are dying to attend a live story slam). Brain Child is your favorite parenting magazine. (Thank goodness it has returned.) You love living in Cleveland Park and you are always puzzled when friends move out to the burbs. Silas is a strange little kid and you like that he's different. He has a strong attachment to a stuffed iguana named "Chicken", he loves earlobes, and he's a wanderer which has resulted in some heart pounding moments, but he's also extremely affectionate and cuddly which you hope will continue for a very long time. Your husband has to travel frequently for his job, so you and Silas have developed some of your own special rituals like special breakfast dinners, living room camp-outs, and lots of scavenger hunts. When your husband is home, he is a reading fanatic and spends large chunks of time reading to Silas. Although, Silas is only four they are currently plowing their way through The Chronicles of Narnia and have plans to tackle The Toll Booth Phantom next. Holidays in your house are always an interesting mix of people, food, and cultures which come surprisingly close to resembling Festivus without the Airing of Grievances (but your husband has been threatening to introduce that custom next winter). Your weaknesses include mayonnaise, sangria, and men with mustaches.

[Anonymous]

Makayla

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Alexandra

Alexandra. Not Alex. Not Lexie. Not Xandra. Not Allie. Always Alexandra. A name you chose because it sounded elegant, chic, and trendy. The problem is that you are constantly having to remind people, especially your in-laws to call her Alexandra. You wish your mom had been more diligent about nipping the nicknaming in the bud and hate the nickname that has stuck with you for all of these years. You are determined not to let the same thing happen with your sweet girl. Little do you know but in about ten years she will refuse to respond to you unless you use the nickname she will receive at camp: "Al" and occasionally "Big Al". That sweet dainty pixie of yours will grow up to be a star softball player and will end up bringing her girlfriend to prom, another popular jockette at their exclusive boarding school. It will break your heart until you realize that you don't want to lose her and you will quickly embrace Al and her gal-pals. You will also be secretly relieved that you don't have to worry about teen pregnancies.

This is completely inaccurate, but I still loved it. Will be referring to her as "Big Al" from now on.