My sister just tried to stage a parenting intervention with me, basically

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's really hard on the other kids when one set comes out with french fries or Ipads and they don't have them.

Watching TV movie probably better or all sharing the Ipad.

it is kind of sad to be on an extended family vacation in nature and spend the evenings on a screen. Try to come up with a joint game plan and set screen limits for all.

my kids have definitely had "friends" who preferred to play on their chromebooks or ipads when we visited. It was sad and the former friend would always choose the screen over playing with a friend. sad.

Wow you think watching 30 minute show is sad when they are waiting for dinner to be ready ? A bit over the top dont you think? It is ok to relax on a vacation! Try it and unclench.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you or your kids overweight? If so, your kids lifestyle could be causing it.

most of the overweight kids i know eat "healthy food" but too much of it (obviously). their mothers carry "healthy" snacks at all times.

[Anonymous]

This says more about your sister than anything else.

From an educational and developmental standpoint, she’s not teaching her 5 and 8 yr old anything by flat out rejecting all screens and junk food. The goal of parenting is to guide children to make good choices and take good care of themselves. All things in moderation. But on vacation… don’t we all loosen up a bit more? Come on. Who doesn’t eat ice cream at the beach?!

[Anonymous]

Tell her "out of kindness" that you're concerned about HER kids being restricted so intensely that they beg for accommodations. Tell her from an educational and social perspective she is raising pariahs who will not be able to comfortably relate to others without envy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's really hard on the other kids when one set comes out with french fries or Ipads and they don't have them.

Watching TV movie probably better or all sharing the Ipad.

it is kind of sad to be on an extended family vacation in nature and spend the evenings on a screen. Try to come up with a joint game plan and set screen limits for all.

my kids have definitely had "friends" who preferred to play on their chromebooks or ipads when we visited. It was sad and the former friend would always choose the screen over playing with a friend. sad.

Wow you think watching 30 minute show is sad when they are waiting for dinner to be ready ? A bit over the top dont you think? It is ok to relax on a vacation! Try it and unclench.

Exactly. Ditch your cousins to go play in your iPad every day. Coolio.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents, sister's family, and my family are vacationing together -- separate cottages but nearby, see each other for meals, activities during day, etc. This is for my parents' 50th anniv, not a regular thing...

My sister and I have kids same age (8/5). They live 1000 miles away and we see them a few times a year.

Her kids are not allowed to use iPads, are not allowed sweets or ice cream or unhealthy snacks (chips/fruit rollups etc), and are not allowed fast-food.

During this trip, I ran to Target with my kids for pool stuff and stopped at BK. Because I know my sister doesn't allow it, my kids ate in the car on the way home, but I guess my older son ambled in with a bag of fries, his cousin saw it, wanted some, and it caused a blowup.

I also let my kids zone out with iPads after the pool yesterday before dinnertime. Her kids aren't allowed to do that, but since mine are, my parents basically begged her to just let everyone watch a movie instead, so that was fine, but I could tell she was mad. It wasn't even intentional, my kids just pulled out their iPads, she saw it, and began fuming. They aren't even in the same cottage as us!

It has been two days and already it's awkward.

At lunch my sister took me aside and told me, "out of kindness," how worried she is about my kids -- being allowed to consume junk food and spending so much time on screens. She wanted to get into it from an educational and developmental perspective.

I really just want to be on vacation and not defend my choices to her.

My parents seem more or less oblivious and I do not want to draw them into this, but I am also not going to deny my kids ice cream or not let them mess around on their iPad before dinner because my sister thinks it's not OK.

WWYD!?

It’s been 2-3 days of fast food and iPad time?

You really make your iPad kids stop at a 30 minute mark?

Your kids age 5 and 8 have their own personal iPads?

What do your kids eat each day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This says more about your sister than anything else.

From an educational and developmental standpoint, she’s not teaching her 5 and 8 yr old anything by flat out rejecting all screens and junk food. The goal of parenting is to guide children to make good choices and take good care of themselves. All things in moderation. But on vacation… don’t we all loosen up a bit more? Come on. Who doesn’t eat ice cream at the beach?!

+1

[Anonymous]

Tell her that “our of kindness” you’re concerned that she’s lost track of basic manners and boundaries and of what is and is not her business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to go pound sand.

+1. I'd try harder not to cause envy (I know you were already trying) but her kids are going to see stuff they want and she'll have to deal with it. It would be more reasonable of her to allow treats on vacation, than vice versa.

But she doesn't get to be "concerned" about your kids, I would be pissed about that.

If she’s going to be that restrictive with her kids, she’s going to have to deal with them being jealous of the rest of the world having things she says they can’t have. Her problem.

And as for the parenting nonsense, if you don’t tell her to go to hell, you’re a better person than I am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell her that “our of kindness” you’re concerned that she’s lost track of basic manners and boundaries and of what is and is not her business.

+1. Lots of people arguing about what is an appropriate amount of screen time, what foods are best etc. but it really doesn’t matter what individual opinions are on this. Raise your kids in the way you think is best and mind your own business when it comes to other peoples parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Take a vacay from your crappy lifestyle.

No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Came here to say exactly this. Not only college, but life in general. Her kids are going to go off the rails. Just say thank you for your concern and move on. Not worth talking to her about it.

While I think OP can rightly walk away and no one should push parenting styles on other families, this is just not true. Childhood obesity is a real issue. Screen time addiction is a real thing. Inability of kids to socialize and talk to one another because they're buried in an iPad is a real thing. Sister may be overboard but her concerns are valid. And I doubt the fact that OP lets her kids eat Burger King and has no limits on screen time is an indicator of them being more equipped for college. Please.

Oh, just stop. More kids than not in America eat junk food (please point out where OP said it is all the time, for every meal) and have lots of screen time. They still go to top colleges and have successful careers and lives. You can save your faux concern trolling, thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should tell your sister you are really worried that her kids are going to totally rebel and be drug addicts because of her crazy strict lifestyle.

And then laugh and say “see sis, let’s stay out of each other’s parenting.”

Plenty of academic research proving the contrary. Kids like OP's sadly turn out to be underachievers more often than not. While kids raised with proper nutrition and impulse control tend to be successful.

Citations please, from peer reviewed sources. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:low class poster - you are trying way too hard. just decided to check out Burger King - I haven’t been there in 20 years.

+1. And by the way, people who actually ARE high class don’t go around calling others low class. The people who do are pathetic, insecure strivers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you or your kids overweight? If so, your kids lifestyle could be causing it.

Noooone of your business.

NP.