“Full time mom”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Full-time mom is stupid. Let's not use it.

Working full time is stupid description too. let’s not use it either.

NP.

Working full time has a legal definition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Listen, every choice has a cost. Nothing comes without a price. SAHM/full time moms give up paid employment to spend more time with their children. WOHM give up time with their children for a career. These are facts.

There is no free lunch. Nobody does it all. Anyone trying to claim otherwise is delusional.

Ha! To listen to the WOHM on this thread they gave up nothing to continue working.. They miraculously spend just as much as much time with their kids as SAHMs. To suggest anything else is OFFENSIVE!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Listen, every choice has a cost. Nothing comes without a price. SAHM/full time moms give up paid employment to spend more time with their children. WOHM give up time with their children for a career. These are facts.

There is no free lunch. Nobody does it all. Anyone trying to claim otherwise is delusional.

Ha! To listen to the WOHM on this thread they gave up nothing to continue working.. They miraculously spend just as much as much time with their kids as SAHMs. To suggest anything else is OFFENSIVE!

I work full time from home, and my kids are school aged. Do I win?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Listen, every choice has a cost. Nothing comes without a price. SAHM/full time moms give up paid employment to spend more time with their children. WOHM give up time with their children for a career. These are facts.

There is no free lunch. Nobody does it all. Anyone trying to claim otherwise is delusional.

Ha! To listen to the WOHM on this thread they gave up nothing to continue working.. They miraculously spend just as much as much time with their kids as SAHMs. To suggest anything else is OFFENSIVE!

I work full time from home, and my kids are school aged. Do I win?

Only if you’ve made zero sacrifices in your life! Congratulations on having it all!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This argument always always comes down to women who are employed want women who do not work outside of the home to say "I don't work".
That's the only response to "what do you do" that satisfies the women in the "workforce" as that term is defined by the Dept of Labor and elsewhere.

I don’t work according to the Dept of Labor. I guess that’s the final word.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s just the truth. If you work, childcare is not your full time job. You are not a childcare provider during work hours, you have hired childcare providers.

Qould it make you feel better if she said “I’m a full-time childcare provider”? She just subbed in “mom”

Yes, every mom is a mom all the time, but not all moms are their child’s full-time childcare provider.

Would you prefer for stay at home parents to refer to themselves as moms who work as child care providers? Would that hurt your feelings less?

If your kids are in school, then you are not a full time mom anymore, according to this very emphatic answer, so I will look forward to hearing less of that, then.

no pleasing insane people.

[Anonymous]

If someone were to describe herself to me as a "full time mom", I'd respond with:
(1) Me too! I also have a full time job. Do you?
(2) Oh! Is your husband a part-time dad?

Trust me that there are SOME (certainly not all) "full time moms" who use that phrase to make clear that their devotion to and love for their children clearly exceeds that of "working mom" who definitely CAN'T love her children as much as the mom whose singular focus during the standard business week is her beloved children. There is definitely an implication that if she is describing herself as a full-time mom, there must be part-time moms and dads out there.

My kids are all school aged, and I think I miss maybe one hour of time per day when they're home and not at school or activities. But I definitely get judged for it by the "full time mom" crowd, even though I'm at all the performances and events. I haven't sufficiently dedicated myself to my children by not quitting my job. I get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone were to describe herself to me as a "full time mom", I'd respond with:
(1) Me too! I also have a full time job. Do you?
(2) Oh! Is your husband a part-time dad?

Trust me that there are SOME (certainly not all) "full time moms" who use that phrase to make clear that their devotion to and love for their children clearly exceeds that of "working mom" who definitely CAN'T love her children as much as the mom whose singular focus during the standard business week is her beloved children. There is definitely an implication that if she is describing herself as a full-time mom, there must be part-time moms and dads out there.

My kids are all school aged, and I think I miss maybe one hour of time per day when they're home and not at school or activities. But I definitely get judged for it by the "full time mom" crowd, even though I'm at all the performances and events. I haven't sufficiently dedicated myself to my children by not quitting my job. I get it.

Either of those responses would be really unnecessarily aggressive and OTT. You think that the "full time mom" is being judgmental but you're coming off way worse in this imaginary exchange.

- WOHM

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone were to describe herself to me as a "full time mom", I'd respond with:
(1) Me too! I also have a full time job. Do you?
(2) Oh! Is your husband a part-time dad?

Trust me that there are SOME (certainly not all) "full time moms" who use that phrase to make clear that their devotion to and love for their children clearly exceeds that of "working mom" who definitely CAN'T love her children as much as the mom whose singular focus during the standard business week is her beloved children. There is definitely an implication that if she is describing herself as a full-time mom, there must be part-time moms and dads out there.

My kids are all school aged, and I think I miss maybe one hour of time per day when they're home and not at school or activities. But I definitely get judged for it by the "full time mom" crowd, even though I'm at all the performances and events. I haven't sufficiently dedicated myself to my children by not quitting my job. I get it.

You cannot be serious! I work full time — as considered by the generally accepted definition of being paid to work 40+ hours a week for an organization/firm/whatever — and I would seriously avoid you like the plague if I heard you say that to anyone. So insecure it’s crazy.

[Anonymous]

I know some people who say “full time mom” because SAHM makes it sound like they’re housebound. If you’re a SAHM, people, at least where I live, can’t seem to live with anything sort of a self-effacing description of how you spend your day.

They want me to say “I’m just a mom” or “I don’t work” and will press and press until they get those exact answers. I say “I’m unemployed” when I know someone’s going to play verbal games with me around the paid employment/parenthood question. It stops the conversation cold.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, please point out instances where this phrase has been used. Because it’s not.

I'm a SAHM who has never used the term, but older gentlemen have used it towards me ("oh, you are a full time mom") in conversation. I've always thought of it as an outdated phrase.

I have really only heard the terms SAHM, housewife, full time mom, etc. used to describe other people. It’s pretty rare that I hear anyone describe themselves this way. Usually people say something like “I’m a pediatrician, but I’m home with the kids right now.” Or “I retired from the army last year.” Or “I was a nurse, but I am thinking of switching into accounting when the kids get older.”
It’s rare that I hear someone respond to a question about their own paid work with answers about unpaid work.

[Anonymous]

If I truly need to be an ass, I say I’m a retired big law partner. (Now loving my bonus baby full time, at home, SAH, living off DH, housewife, whatever.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, please point out instances where this phrase has been used. Because it’s not.

I'm a SAHM who has never used the term, but older gentlemen have used it towards me ("oh, you are a full time mom") in conversation. I've always thought of it as an outdated phrase.

I have really only heard the terms SAHM, housewife, full time mom, etc. used to describe other people. It’s pretty rare that I hear anyone describe themselves this way. Usually people say something like “I’m a pediatrician, but I’m home with the kids right now.” Or “I retired from the army last year.” Or “I was a nurse, but I am thinking of switching into accounting when the kids get older.”
It’s rare that I hear someone respond to a question about their own paid work with answers about unpaid work.

OP here. I noticed someone from my kid’s school (a mom) who is an acquaintance of mine described herself on her Facebook profile as a “Full-time mom.”

[Anonymous]

If the person is referring to themselves like on a Facebook profile, I generally see something along the lines of "part-time nurse, weekend warrior, full-time mom" or whatever it is. It's just a phrase.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, please point out instances where this phrase has been used. Because it’s not.

I'm a SAHM who has never used the term, but older gentlemen have used it towards me ("oh, you are a full time mom") in conversation. I've always thought of it as an outdated phrase.

I have really only heard the terms SAHM, housewife, full time mom, etc. used to describe other people. It’s pretty rare that I hear anyone describe themselves this way. Usually people say something like “I’m a pediatrician, but I’m home with the kids right now.” Or “I retired from the army last year.” Or “I was a nurse, but I am thinking of switching into accounting when the kids get older.”
It’s rare that I hear someone respond to a question about their own paid work with answers about unpaid work.

OP here. I noticed someone from my kid’s school (a mom) who is an acquaintance of mine described herself on her Facebook profile as a “Full-time mom.”

I'm certain she didn't mean to offend.