Is there anything better than marrying a rich guy you met in college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Posts like OP's are so immature and seem so devoid of wisdom I wonder if the person writing them is actually an adult. Is this all some of you do all day, compare your life to that of your rich acquaintances? Is that really what life has taught you? Can't you at least learn to control your thoughts?

And further, these posts are always about money and talking about this mid-point of someone's life, not the result. No one on DCUM is jealous of their friend who was a doctor for 30 years and made a breakthrough in a disease, or their friend who raised 2 great kids who became awesome adults. You know why? Because by the time people reach that age, I'm thinking they are mature enough not to care about this shit anymore.

Also, this is America. If you want a luxury SUV, go ahead and lease one. It really won't make your life one iota better but at least you'll get it out of your system.

Exactly. This is the worst, weirdest thread. SO much bitterness and snobbery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Posts like OP's are so immature and seem so devoid of wisdom I wonder if the person writing them is actually an adult. Is this all some of you do all day, compare your life to that of your rich acquaintances? Is that really what life has taught you? Can't you at least learn to control your thoughts?

And further, these posts are always about money and talking about this mid-point of someone's life, not the result. No one on DCUM is jealous of their friend who was a doctor for 30 years and made a breakthrough in a disease, or their friend who raised 2 great kids who became awesome adults. You know why? Because by the time people reach that age, I'm thinking they are mature enough not to care about this shit anymore.

Also, this is America. If you want a luxury SUV, go ahead and lease one. It really won't make your life one iota better but at least you'll get it out of your system.

Bitter yentas cling to the niece's choice of any new luxury SUV (so tacky!!! ) while ignoring the custom mansion, vacation homes, liquid assets, best private schools, being top of the economic food chain wherever they're at, never having to worry about retirement, on and on. Before age 30. A communications major who never crammed for a tough exam. Who can do yoga and pilates all day while we sit in offices all day getting fat asses. All because she had the sense in college to reel in a rich boy from flyover country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posts like OP's are so immature and seem so devoid of wisdom I wonder if the person writing them is actually an adult. Is this all some of you do all day, compare your life to that of your rich acquaintances? Is that really what life has taught you? Can't you at least learn to control your thoughts?

And further, these posts are always about money and talking about this mid-point of someone's life, not the result. No one on DCUM is jealous of their friend who was a doctor for 30 years and made a breakthrough in a disease, or their friend who raised 2 great kids who became awesome adults. You know why? Because by the time people reach that age, I'm thinking they are mature enough not to care about this shit anymore.

Also, this is America. If you want a luxury SUV, go ahead and lease one. It really won't make your life one iota better but at least you'll get it out of your system.

Bitter yentas cling to the niece's choice of any new luxury SUV (so tacky!!! ) while ignoring the custom mansion, vacation homes, liquid assets, best private schools, being top of the economic food chain wherever they're at, never having to worry about retirement, on and on. Before age 30. A communications major who never crammed for a tough exam. Who can do yoga and pilates all day while we sit in offices all day getting fat asses. All because she had the sense in college to reel in a rich boy from flyover country.

I agree. I don’t think it’s shallow or silly to be jealous of her.

I for one am not jealous because of the ugly expensive car or mansion.

I’m jealous of her early smarts and realizing the importance of finding a guy who can provide.

I’m jealous that she’ll never have to worry about money.

I’m jealous that she will have comfort and security her whole life.

Her children will have access to the best of the best.

She will not have to work her butt off and be upset trying to please bosses.

She can focus on herself and her family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Basically if you’re a woman the best thing you can do for yourself and your children is to marry rich and marry young.

Everything else comes after!

Want a career? Easy with your husbands money funding your tuition after you pop out two kids.

Want a younger guy? Divorce your rich husband, get all his money and then date for true love.

Spot on.

[Anonymous]

When the kids are old enough or she gets too bored during the day, she'll probably go to the local university and pick up a masters, then one of her husband's rich friends will give her some $80,000 a year part-time gig.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posts like OP's are so immature and seem so devoid of wisdom I wonder if the person writing them is actually an adult. Is this all some of you do all day, compare your life to that of your rich acquaintances? Is that really what life has taught you? Can't you at least learn to control your thoughts?

And further, these posts are always about money and talking about this mid-point of someone's life, not the result. No one on DCUM is jealous of their friend who was a doctor for 30 years and made a breakthrough in a disease, or their friend who raised 2 great kids who became awesome adults. You know why? Because by the time people reach that age, I'm thinking they are mature enough not to care about this shit anymore.

Also, this is America. If you want a luxury SUV, go ahead and lease one. It really won't make your life one iota better but at least you'll get it out of your system.

Bitter yentas cling to the niece's choice of any new luxury SUV (so tacky!!! ) while ignoring the custom mansion, vacation homes, liquid assets, best private schools, being top of the economic food chain wherever they're at, never having to worry about retirement, on and on. Before age 30. A communications major who never crammed for a tough exam. Who can do yoga and pilates all day while we sit in offices all day getting fat asses. All because she had the sense in college to reel in a rich boy from flyover country.

I agree. I don’t think it’s shallow or silly to be jealous of her.

I for one am not jealous because of the ugly expensive car or mansion.

I’m jealous of her early smarts and realizing the importance of finding a guy who can provide.

I’m jealous that she’ll never have to worry about money.

I’m jealous that she will have comfort and security her whole life.

Her children will have access to the best of the best.

She will not have to work her butt off and be upset trying to please bosses.

She can focus on herself and her family.

Again, are you an actual adult? If the one and only objective in your life is to have the "best," in material goods and status and working little, then yes, marrying rich is a brilliant move.

But maybe there are plenty of happy, secure people who don't actually desire this.

I think there is a fallacy on this board that money = security for the rest of your life. That's not true. Money gives you the illusion of security, which for many people, is enough. But money cannot protect you from everything, including depression or unhappiness. Nor will money secure your children for the rest of their lives. Even with huge sums of money you can still lose that money, get sick, die, get divorced, raise screwed up kids, raise kids who lose all that money you wanted so much. It happens and it has happened to people who are smarter and nicer and more attractive than you or me. You might say "oh, but money makes all of those worst-case scenarios less likely," or "I'd rather have a problem WITH money than without it." Ok, sure, but wouldn't you rather just not have problems?

I make an average income, but I don't have a shit-ton of problems in my life. I definitely have problems, but they're problems I can handle. And you know what? That's enough. I don't need a luxury yacht, or trips to Europe, or fancy schools for my kids.

You know what money can't buy? Time. You have a finite time on this Earth, and you are wasting it on stupid shit like fantasizing about your rich friend and how she has it better than you.
I'm going to enjoy what I have instead of wasting my time.

[Anonymous]

It's weird how people assume the niece isn't happy. You can fall in love with pleasant wealthy boys... they're not all like Trump's kids, especially the rich boys from flyover states.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being rich in a flyover metro is no different than being rich in a coastal city once you're married (with kids). Men work, go to kid's private school functions, drink good scotch alone in the basement while watching cable news at night. SAHMs do yoga, shop at Whole Foods, post on facebook. Your circle of friends is other execs, business owners, lawyers, doctors, professors. If you're jones'ing for the one Kennedy Center event you go to a year, fly to it. Flyover is only a risk for middle class who don't have the deep labor market bounce around.

This isn't true. I'm from a wealthy area in a flyover metro and it's VERY different than living in DC with a two career household.

Can you elaborate PP? I am considering a relocation with my family and would love to hear your take. Will I die of boredom?

Not pp but I’m from Chicago and never been bored. The nightlife is extensive, we have good outdoor spaces to run and bike, and many of the moms are yoga finatics that shop at Whole Foods. I can see moving to a rural area can be boring if you’re a city person, but living in Chicago or in the heart of cities like Minneapolis, Indianapolis, Colombus, OH, etc., will not leave you bored.

I would be very happy living in Indianapolis. I spent a year living in South Bend and I actually became depressed it was so horrible.

Flyover country single and broke != flyover country with a family and millions

I was married and definitely not broke. It was just a god awful place to live. There was absolutely nothing to do and the restaurants were horrific. Look, I have lived in a lot of places as a trailing spouse of an academic (and i mean a lot, including 2 in Europe), and some places are just shitty no matter how much money you have.

This plus 1 million. South Bend/Mishawaka is God-awful. Restaurants? Steak and Ale. Shake Shack. TGI Fridays. Mediocre chain after mediocre chain.

I spent two awful years of my life there in my mid 20s.

[Anonymous]

$2 million near Notre Dame and a Whole Foods gets you

[Anonymous]

We lived in the NYC area for a lot of years (1980's) and got tired of the dirty city, third world airports, collapsing infrastructure and in your face attitudes. We moved to SF area and while we loved the physical beauty we grew tired of the California first and only mentality along with high taxes and lousy schools. We eventually landed in a big Midwest city and loved it. It had all of the arts, sports, restaurants etc of NY and SF but much nicer people. Plus it had great schools and very affordable real estate. The only thing I didn't like was the cold winter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We lived in the NYC area for a lot of years (1980's) and got tired of the dirty city, third world airports, collapsing infrastructure and in your face attitudes. We moved to SF area and while we loved the physical beauty we grew tired of the California first and only mentality along with high taxes and lousy schools. We eventually landed in a big Midwest city and loved it. It had all of the arts, sports, restaurants etc of NY and SF but much nicer people. Plus it had great schools and very affordable real estate. The only thing I didn't like was the cold winter.

No post has ever cried out so loudly for a "Cool story, bro."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Being a self-made woman that dates young hot men.

Boo-yah!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's weird how people assume the niece isn't happy. You can fall in love with pleasant wealthy boys... they're not all like Trump's kids, especially the rich boys from flyover states.

Nobody is assuming she isn't happy. OP framed it as ENTIRELY about material advantages and "being at the top of the economic foodchain" and driving a brand-new SUV. If she's happy, great. Many different ways to be happy. The offensive thing is OP's suggestion that the pinnacle of female happiness is to go to yoga and drive an SUV and rub your wealth in other people's faces.

[Anonymous]

Again, are you an actual adult? If the one and only objective in your life is to have the "best," in material goods and status and working little, then yes, marrying rich is a brilliant move.

But maybe there are plenty of happy, secure people who don't actually desire this.

I think there is a fallacy on this board that money = security for the rest of your life. That's not true. Money gives you the illusion of security, which for many people, is enough. But money cannot protect you from everything, including depression or unhappiness. Nor will money secure your children for the rest of their lives. Even with huge sums of money you can still lose that money, get sick, die, get divorced, raise screwed up kids, raise kids who lose all that money you wanted so much. It happens and it has happened to people who are smarter and nicer and more attractive than you or me. You might say "oh, but money makes all of those worst-case scenarios less likely," or "I'd rather have a problem WITH money than without it." Ok, sure, but wouldn't you rather just not have problems?

I make an average income, but I don't have a shit-ton of problems in my life. I definitely have problems, but they're problems I can handle. And you know what? That's enough. I don't need a luxury yacht, or trips to Europe, or fancy schools for my kids.

You know what money can't buy? Time. You have a finite time on this Earth, and you are wasting it on stupid shit like fantasizing about your rich friend and how she has it better than you.
I'm going to enjoy what I have instead of wasting my time.

x1000

[Anonymous]

Ha ha. Making your own money so you never have to get married, but instead keep a string of hot pool boys around?