Secret about your child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My almost 6 years old still wears a pull up at night or he will wake up soaking WET. We don't know any kid his age that is still wearing diapers/pullups at night. Child said he has tried but still "I pee alot at night, mom. I can't get up to go to the bathroom. I tried many times, mom. I will fall out of the bed if I try." And this is a kid that everyone says he's so well trained in manners, eating, dressing being nice. But, that has nothing to do with biological functions.
I blame it on the dumb loft bed which is high and hard to get off at night in the dark. And DH always encourage him to drink enough water...at NIGHT before bed!
But, it's not the end of the world.

My 6 1/2 year old is still in a pull-up at night, always soaks it, and leaks out of it a couple times a week. We've tried waking him to go to the bathroom before we go to bed but he's a really deep sleeper and doesn't even stir. I've offered those night training alarms but he refuses to wear one. Pediatrician says not to sweat it for now...

My niece is 7 1/2 and still wears a pull up at night. Pediatrician is not worried.

My almost 7.5 year old still wears a pull-up at night; some pediatricians weren't worried, but one said it would be worth looking into further. I suspected chronic constipation and an x-ray proved I was right. Could be worth looking into.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My almost 6 years old still wears a pull up at night or he will wake up soaking WET. We don't know any kid his age that is still wearing diapers/pullups at night. Child said he has tried but still "I pee alot at night, mom. I can't get up to go to the bathroom. I tried many times, mom. I will fall out of the bed if I try." And this is a kid that everyone says he's so well trained in manners, eating, dressing being nice. But, that has nothing to do with biological functions.
I blame it on the dumb loft bed which is high and hard to get off at night in the dark. And DH always encourage him to drink enough water...at NIGHT before bed!
But, it's not the end of the world.

My son did this for WAAAAYYYYY too long. He's special needs, but still - there was no reason for it (but that was why there was hand wringing about it by parents).
Proof - one night I told him he could have x number of dollars if he didn't pee in his pullup/pee in his bed in the morning. Woke up dry - now and forever.
He likes money - he loves to go shop for something. Find out what your son likes & give him some each morning he wakes up dry once you decide you've had enough
and he's ready (and, um, get a night light. And how about some simple stick on lights for the floor to light the way to the bathroom? Could be kind of cool - would look
like an airplane aisle...) - you only have to do this a few times and then they just wake up dry, it doesn't last forever (the bribery).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is three years old and has never had a babysitter other then daycare.

We do things together on the weekends because it is the only time we have together, other then the two short hours every weekday after pick up and before bedtime.

We do not have family that can help out unless it was an emergency and that would be a burden, for them because of their own responsibilities and distance from us, about 40 minutes.

We are the same. My 4 year old has never had a sitter except for daycare. I feel like people think it's strange!

+1 except my kid is 5. Soon he'll be old enough to just come along with us on evening outings, so I'm guessing he'll never have a sitter.

[Anonymous]

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How did the DD contract HIV? I would never say it IRL but this freaks me out. I saw/read something a few years ago about people adopting babies who have HIV, most of whom contracted it from their drug-addicted mothers. When my ds was in daycare he was bit three times by another baby, then bit a fourth time and she drew blood. My ped couldn't have been less concerned, as it's a "normal" part of daycare, and the thought of HIV didn't seem to cross anyone's mind. Also, think about the collisions you see in sports where at least one person ends up bleeding. Remote as the chances may be, I worry about this.

I can't believe I have to post these links, but:

http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/HIV_AIDS_hepatitis_and_sport

http://www.avert.org/hiv-transmission-questions-answers.htm

HIV is much, much less virulent than other blood-borne diseases like Hepatitis, and even less so now that there are so many excellent drugs to suppress the virus. I'd be way more worried about a local infection from the bite you described, and understanding why another child was able to bite your kid four separate times, than HIV!! People fought long and hard to destigmatize HIV, remember Ryan White? Please don't undo their decades of courageous work by spreading misinformation and fear-mongering.

You're a millennial, aren't you?

Not sure how that's relevant...but to answer your question, no, I'm not.

Millennials aren't taking HIV seriously.

Seriously? Have you not made the connection that millenials are the first generation that 1. haven't been totally caught up in the "HIV = INSTANT DEATH" hype/misinformation, and 2. have seen actual research to prove that HIV is not a death sentence. Millennials are the first generation to somewhat understand HIV for what it is. Thanks science!

And that's why you'll keep spreading it. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

My secret about my son is that his "biological mom" was my DH's first wife, and she abandoned them. I love my son fiercely, and I dread the day she might decide to contact him again. I raised him and he is mine, and I am terrified that someday he will turn from me if she decides to slink back into his life. He's in college now and hasn't seen or heard from her since he was really little, but I fear that this could cause him to romanticize the idea of her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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How did the DD contract HIV? I would never say it IRL but this freaks me out. I saw/read something a few years ago about people adopting babies who have HIV, most of whom contracted it from their drug-addicted mothers. When my ds was in daycare he was bit three times by another baby, then bit a fourth time and she drew blood. My ped couldn't have been less concerned, as it's a "normal" part of daycare, and the thought of HIV didn't seem to cross anyone's mind. Also, think about the collisions you see in sports where at least one person ends up bleeding. Remote as the chances may be, I worry about this.

I can't believe I have to post these links, but:

http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/HIV_AIDS_hepatitis_and_sport

http://www.avert.org/hiv-transmission-questions-answers.htm

HIV is much, much less virulent than other blood-borne diseases like Hepatitis, and even less so now that there are so many excellent drugs to suppress the virus. I'd be way more worried about a local infection from the bite you described, and understanding why another child was able to bite your kid four separate times, than HIV!! People fought long and hard to destigmatize HIV, remember Ryan White? Please don't undo their decades of courageous work by spreading misinformation and fear-mongering.

You're a millennial, aren't you?

Not sure how that's relevant...but to answer your question, no, I'm not.

Millennials aren't taking HIV seriously.

Seriously? Have you not made the connection that millenials are the first generation that 1. haven't been totally caught up in the "HIV = INSTANT DEATH" hype/misinformation, and 2. have seen actual research to prove that HIV is not a death sentence. Millennials are the first generation to somewhat understand HIV for what it is. Thanks science!

And that's why you'll keep spreading it. Thanks.

I'm the PP who knows the family with the DD who has HIV. She was adopted by her family and her birth mother had HIV. She's had it since she was born and did not contract it from sex or drug use.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More like a secret about me.

I stopped coming home for lunch because my son was never happy to see me and afraid it meant his nanny was leaving. He would cling on to the nanny and yell "no!".

This is totally normal and OK. I learned from my son's daycare workers and director that the parent visit is just too disruptive to their daily routine (for most kids). When they're really little, they don't know what to make of it, it makes them feel all out of whack, and they don't know how to express it. So, don't worry about this, and don't think of it as a secret. It's common!

Oh brother. Way to rationalize. It's as plain as day what this kid is saying -- he prefers his nanny. You have to be pretty desperate to believe it's because he's "all out of whack" and just "doesn't know how to express it". Please.

PP who posted the original above -- your post has stayed with me. What a difficult thing to experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My secret about my son is that his "biological mom" was my DH's first wife, and she abandoned them. I love my son fiercely, and I dread the day she might decide to contact him again. I raised him and he is mine, and I am terrified that someday he will turn from me if she decides to slink back into his life. He's in college now and hasn't seen or heard from her since he was really little, but I fear that this could cause him to romanticize the idea of her.

Does he know you didn't give birth to him? And are there other kids? Just curious

[Anonymous]

Re: the HIV+ child and generational issues.

When aids first became an epidemic, it WAS a death sentence. Research and treatments are making it something one can live with.

However, just because it is survivable doesn't make it something you want to contract. Not to mention the other stds still out there and also stuff that could kill you.

Don't slack off on condoms just because HIV is no longer an immediate death sentence.

[Anonymous]

There was a story in the Post just a couple weeks ago about a little girl with HIV. She didn't know and they were just about to explain it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My eldest is a delicate flower. I'm putting her in sports because I want her to learn about teamwork and sportmanship, but I am pretty sure she's a nerd and not cut out for athletics in the long run.

Debate team would teach her about teamwork and sportsmanship, but without making her feel like a failure.

[Anonymous]

My eldest is a delicate flower. I'm putting her in sports because I want her to learn about teamwork and sportmanship, but I am pretty sure she's a nerd and not cut out for athletics in the long run.


Debate team would teach her about teamwork and sportsmanship, but without making her feel like a failure.

You don't know yet if it will make her feel like a failure. My son is not very athletic and still has fun on his low-key rec soccer team. He's not a good player, but not terrible either, and he has a good time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is currently getting way more screen time than I ever thought I would allow. Like multiple hours every day. Every day I swear I'm taking that iPad away, but then I fail, or succeed a little then give up. I'm having a tough time myself recently. Depression, anxiety, marriage is a mess, think spouse is cheating, DC has some special needs and is not an easy kid and I just don't have energy these days. I feel like a massive parenting failure because I can't seem to manage simp,e things like getting a fairly balanced/normal dinner on plus keeping house somewhat organized, etc. etc. my to do list is expanding and when my kid is on the iPad she's happy and I can have the best chance of getting stuff done.

When I was a kid I routinely watched 2-3 hours of tv per day. Sesame Street, Mr Rogers, 3-2-1 Contact, Electric Company all before dinner. Then Silver Spoons and something else after dinner from 8-9pm. I also read a shit-ton of books, did tons of imaginative play and creative writing, danced, acted, played sports..

Just sort of ... always made time for tv. Probably watched two hours at minimum every day through high school. Now an adult and still watch two to three hours of tv at night while doing mail, laundry, working out, etc. I still read, write, keep the house neat, play with the kids, care for the dog, etc. For some kids it's a problem, for other kids tv can be fine.

Highly agree!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am glad my oldest is as gorgeous as she is and has great people skills because she isn't as bright and ambitious as we thought she'd be.

Let me clarify: She IS smart. She was in GT, Honors, and AP classes. But she's not scholarly or driven. People like her a lot and she's chosen a career field where being charming is an asset so she'll get by.

A kid who is in GT, Honors, and AP is smart enough to do really well in life, even if she isn't academic or curious or bright. I was the same way and went to an ivy undergrad and grad school -- bc I was motivated by what I needed on my resume to make money, not bc I was super bright or even cared about what I learned.

What do I do with a child who is very bright (smarter then parents & we have PhD's degrees in technical subjects) but is not overly motivated or ambitious? I guess that you do nothing
but provide the tools to get an education but I worry. We're waiting for her to be scholarly & driven & not throw away her gift - but that's her right I guess. She doesn't have people skills - so,
being scholarly would be what I would think would be the route, but it's not - that's why I worry. I have no idea what makes her happy & what will make her a productive member of society.
Oh well, that's the fun in parenting - right?

what would be wrong with her working as a secretary and doing whatever her thing is (and it may be watching a lot of TV). People without drive and motivation and ambition can put together happy, productive lives. Maybe she'll marry a guy or girl like herself ( aretail manager) and they'll together make 50 grand and live two houes from here where she can buy a rambler or a townhouse. I hope you still treasure and adore her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will not betray the trust between my children and I by revealing their secrets.

+1 Their trust is precious to me. No way I'd breach that, even on an anonymous message board.

100. The betrayal on this thread is breathtaking.

the only secret that would devestate the kids to know is the one about the mom loving one more than the other. The rest kids woudl be like "eh" about. I don't see betrayal.