The Stigma around AA parents adopting a white baby

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a sad and depressing thread. It makes me concerned for the futures of our children when they are being raised by people with these viewpoints. None of you are any better than the white supremacists we all revile...sad, sad, sad.

And for the women who married interracially and can't stand the idea of their child looking like their spouse - you guys have some deep-rooted issues. Please don't have any children with your husbands! You will fuck them up!

I agree. And I would extend this sentiment to both the Black woman espousing such hatred and the White woman who responded that she was glad her biracial children look more white.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Looks like this thing was derailed by a crazy poster. I didn't get through all the posts, but want to add that I am an AA adoptive mom who would not adopt a white baby. The reason is that there are too many AA babies who need families, far more than white babies. There are lots of reasons for this, but it is NOT because AA's don't adopt. It's a little ridiculous to think your friend lives in a diverse progressive place but doesn't know any adoptive AA families. We are all over DC area, though perhaps you've never noticed. So many people say my kids look like us (they don't, but we are all black, so....). I'm sure that they were adopted is not common knowledge. So I wouldn't do it, and I would look askance at any AA couple who adopted a white baby because they wanted a white baby (as opposed to knew the child, were asked, etc. which is a different situation).

This is a reasonable reason for not adopting a while baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia.

Not that PP. It's not about slavery now. To be more clear, blacks were lynched through the 1960s. Banks refused mortgages to blacks via redlining throughout the country and in Chicago through the 80s. And the recent shootings have been sparking riots and highlighting racial inequality in various cities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A friend of mine adopted a white infant. She and her husband are both black, and they have two biological children. She hadn't planned on adopting but she ended up in a situation where the baby practically fell into her lap and she obviously got attached. Parental ties were cut, and she legally adopted the child right before her first birthday.

I knew it wasn't common, but was surprised at the shitstorm it caused from the white and black community. She's some some nastiness in a "progressive" area. She said she hasn't found a single other black family who has adopted, let alone a child not within their own rase.

Why is this so unheard of? I know some people have issues with anyone adopting outside their race, or adoption in general but this is an entirely different level of ridiculousness she's faced.

I can see people pushing back on it for a couple of reasons. 1) White babies are hard to come by and many white families would have liked to have that baby. Jealousy makes people nasty. 2) There are many AA children who languish in foster care and need adoptive parents. If AA families don't adopt them, who will?

That said... fuck it. Your friend loves her child and there is no reason to apologize to anybody for anything. The two reasons I listed don't take into account your friend's particular circumstances. Life takes strange turns and she doesn't have to explain this turn to anybody but her baby.

It's not just black kids that languish but really older kids of any race. I used to live near a home for orphaned and foster kids in another state. There were plenty of white children there waiting to be adopted but not many people want to take on an older child.

[Anonymous]

"I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia. "

Slavery, slavery, slavery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Due to racism, AAs feels inferior and protect themselves with bigotry. It's a cheap way towards affirmation. "I'm yucky and worthless, so I'll just say white babies are..." The real question is what's wrong with supposed white DH. I doubt there is one.

You can believe whatever comforts you at night. There are people out here who don't find your yellow haired pink kids attractive. We don't want them or your affirmation. My white husband doesn't care because he just wants me however he can get me, lol. To hell with the white race as long as he can have his wife.

And the ignorance continues... For one, I'm not Caucasian. But, that's beside the point. You want affirmation from the parents who abandoned you and the white man who has exploited you. You could care a less about yellow-haired pink kids, except you desperately want to look like them. You can't and so you attack. That is how you've learned to cope. But, that sort of "coping" never produces longterm results. You remain empty inside and you seek whatever venue you can to feel a sense of worthiness. Today it's DCUM, tomorrow it'll be something else.

You write so eloquently about this because it is how you feel. You want to be white very badly, don't you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

As an adoptive parent, I don't see any issue with what this poster is saying. It's honest and that's the best policy when discussing adoption.

Far too often, white parents adopt a non-white child even when deep down they are unsure or think that race won't matter to them.

I've seen this in the adoption forums I participate. White women who adopt from Ethiopia and the Congo have said that their children are not Black, but African. As if Africans are not Black. That's like saying I am not white, I am Irish or British. They have also stated that they keep their children away from the Black community, but don't know anyone in the Ethiopian or Congo community. I personally believe that those children will have some serious issues once they hit their teens. It's my opinion and I am sticking with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

You don't think white babies are cute but you think white men are cute, considering you married one of them? When you look at your husband's childhood photos, are you thinking "boy, what an ugly baby!"?!?!

It's actually funny you ask this because DH's mother is always carrying on about what a cute kid DH was. I feel nothing when I look at the baby photos she is always thrusting at me though. Neither DH nor his siblings are even one third as cute as the kids in my family. White adults are better than white kids IMO, although I don't particularly like white adults either. I love DH and the white men I dated before him were great, but my feeling is not extended to the rest of the race.

Damn, Gina. I actually was seeing your point til this comment.

Holy shit. I know who posted the white hate.

Which one? I count at least three white hating posters. I am keeping track of them according to their kids ha ha. One has tan kids, one has a white-looking kid, there is one who hasn't said anything about his/her kids yet.

She has one child and is a fairly new mother..she has many deep insecurities about her own race and upbringing as a biracial child. This exchange is just the tip of the iceburg. She is a bright and intelligent young woman, but is terribly bitter about life in general. This issues don't stop at race.

Oddly, she predominantly hangs out with white people and spends an absolute fortune trying to keep her hair as straight as a white womans.

Regardless, I think she is a lovely person, just terribly broken.

You are sounding as crazy as some of the posters here. Did you really just bring some random woman you know in real life into this thread?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

Are you bio children at least half-cute?

Seriously, you are either a troll, or a deranged person. I'm reporting your filth to the admin. You don't deserve to open your mouth here.

You're reporting the legacy of slavery to the admin?

Yes, I don't get why people are so upset about this pp's point of view. It makes a lot of sense to me and I'm white. Some of her critics seem to think she should be colorblind but it hasn't been a colorblind world while that pp was growing up and it's still not a colorblind world. Plus when she is ready to adopt, there's going to be lots of white families competing for those white babies. Why should she get involved in that? When there are so many black kids that are waiting for forever homes?

Oh, I don't think anyone's condemning her for simply not wanting to adopt a white child. It's the need to slam the attractiveness of white children and express her disgust towards them. Similarly, I can't imagine anyone saying "I don't feel like I'm in a good position personally or culturally to adopt a black child " being condemned for that. But if they feel the need to go into gleeful detail about how unappealing they find black children… yeah, I'd judge that.

Okay, so that's not particularly attractive, I see your point. But given what it's like to grow up AA in this country, I totally understand why she would feel that way. Plus she's talking in the abstract. It doesn't seem to be a factor in her relationship with her family members.

For example, I was born in the 50s and when I was pregnant I wasn't sure if I wanted a boy. Even though my kid was born in the 90s, I didn't know if I could be fair to a boy who would come into the world with a lot more advantages just due to his gender and because when I was young, being a girl was like a punishment. (Didn't watch Madmen for years because I didn't want to be reminded of that.) I had a girl so the point is moot but I'm sure that if I'd had a boy I'd get over my concern and love that kid with all my heart. But I could see saying something negative about baby boys in the abstract, given my history. That's how I view the pp's assertion about white children.

I don't think some people realize the damage that was done to a lot of people over the years having to grow up in a world that systematically provides advantages to people of a certain racial/ethnic background (and class as well but we'll stick with race/ethnicity here). Just because we have a black president doesn't mean that all that is in the past now. I can understand why she would still be angry.

I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia.

Slavery is the history and legacy of this country. If you cannot handle it, then you should return to wherever you came from. You have no right to tell people whose families have been in this country farrrr longer than yours that we should simply not speak of what happened to our ancestors. You and your family chose to come over here, that's not our problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Due to racism, AAs feels inferior and protect themselves with bigotry. It's a cheap way towards affirmation. "I'm yucky and worthless, so I'll just say white babies are..." The real question is what's wrong with supposed white DH. I doubt there is one.

Sorry woman, but speak for your damn self. I am inferior to no one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

Are you bio children at least half-cute?

Seriously, you are either a troll, or a deranged person. I'm reporting your filth to the admin. You don't deserve to open your mouth here.

You're reporting the legacy of slavery to the admin?

Yes, I don't get why people are so upset about this pp's point of view. It makes a lot of sense to me and I'm white. Some of her critics seem to think she should be colorblind but it hasn't been a colorblind world while that pp was growing up and it's still not a colorblind world. Plus when she is ready to adopt, there's going to be lots of white families competing for those white babies. Why should she get involved in that? When there are so many black kids that are waiting for forever homes?

Oh, I don't think anyone's condemning her for simply not wanting to adopt a white child. It's the need to slam the attractiveness of white children and express her disgust towards them. Similarly, I can't imagine anyone saying "I don't feel like I'm in a good position personally or culturally to adopt a black child " being condemned for that. But if they feel the need to go into gleeful detail about how unappealing they find black children… yeah, I'd judge that.

Okay, so that's not particularly attractive, I see your point. But given what it's like to grow up AA in this country, I totally understand why she would feel that way. Plus she's talking in the abstract. It doesn't seem to be a factor in her relationship with her family members.

For example, I was born in the 50s and when I was pregnant I wasn't sure if I wanted a boy. Even though my kid was born in the 90s, I didn't know if I could be fair to a boy who would come into the world with a lot more advantages just due to his gender and because when I was young, being a girl was like a punishment. (Didn't watch Madmen for years because I didn't want to be reminded of that.) I had a girl so the point is moot but I'm sure that if I'd had a boy I'd get over my concern and love that kid with all my heart. But I could see saying something negative about baby boys in the abstract, given my history. That's how I view the pp's assertion about white children.

I don't think some people realize the damage that was done to a lot of people over the years having to grow up in a world that systematically provides advantages to people of a certain racial/ethnic background (and class as well but we'll stick with race/ethnicity here). Just because we have a black president doesn't mean that all that is in the past now. I can understand why she would still be angry.

I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia.

Slavery is the history and legacy of this country. If you cannot handle it, then you should return to wherever you came from. You have no right to tell people whose families have been in this country farrrr longer than yours that we should simply not speak of what happened to our ancestors. You and your family chose to come over here, that's not our problem.

Pretty much. Worst of all, PP is too stupid to realize that there is a lot more than slavery at work. She needs to take her ignorant behind back wherever she came from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

As an adoptive parent, I don't see any issue with what this poster is saying. It's honest and that's the best policy when discussing adoption.

Far too often, white parents adopt a non-white child even when deep down they are unsure or think that race won't matter to them.

I've seen this in the adoption forums I participate. White women who adopt from Ethiopia and the Congo have said that their children are not Black, but African. As if Africans are not Black. That's like saying I am not white, I am Irish or British. They have also stated that they keep their children away from the Black community, but don't know anyone in the Ethiopian or Congo community. I personally believe that those children will have some serious issues once they hit their teens. It's my opinion and I am sticking with it.

When my DH was a social worker he had a white family that had black foster kids. But it turned out the family had serious, serious racial issues. They actually ended up sending the kids to another foster home it was so bad. It was obvious they could not stand black people. Lots of white people have no business adopting or taking in non-white foster kids, but do it anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia.

Not that PP. It's not about slavery now. To be more clear, blacks were lynched through the 1960s. Banks refused mortgages to blacks via redlining throughout the country and in Chicago through the 80s. And the recent shootings have been sparking riots and highlighting racial inequality in various cities.

I don't think the 1960s and recent riots belong on one page for a number of reasons, but it is a different topic.

Explaining racism away is not right. If you are willing to excuse it for whatever reason, you should not complain about experiecing it. But then again, I come from a long line of very pragmatic people who will not mince words.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

Are you bio children at least half-cute?

Seriously, you are either a troll, or a deranged person. I'm reporting your filth to the admin. You don't deserve to open your mouth here.

You're reporting the legacy of slavery to the admin?

Yes, I don't get why people are so upset about this pp's point of view. It makes a lot of sense to me and I'm white. Some of her critics seem to think she should be colorblind but it hasn't been a colorblind world while that pp was growing up and it's still not a colorblind world. Plus when she is ready to adopt, there's going to be lots of white families competing for those white babies. Why should she get involved in that? When there are so many black kids that are waiting for forever homes?

Oh, I don't think anyone's condemning her for simply not wanting to adopt a white child. It's the need to slam the attractiveness of white children and express her disgust towards them. Similarly, I can't imagine anyone saying "I don't feel like I'm in a good position personally or culturally to adopt a black child " being condemned for that. But if they feel the need to go into gleeful detail about how unappealing they find black children… yeah, I'd judge that.

Okay, so that's not particularly attractive, I see your point. But given what it's like to grow up AA in this country, I totally understand why she would feel that way. Plus she's talking in the abstract. It doesn't seem to be a factor in her relationship with her family members.

For example, I was born in the 50s and when I was pregnant I wasn't sure if I wanted a boy. Even though my kid was born in the 90s, I didn't know if I could be fair to a boy who would come into the world with a lot more advantages just due to his gender and because when I was young, being a girl was like a punishment. (Didn't watch Madmen for years because I didn't want to be reminded of that.) I had a girl so the point is moot but I'm sure that if I'd had a boy I'd get over my concern and love that kid with all my heart. But I could see saying something negative about baby boys in the abstract, given my history. That's how I view the pp's assertion about white children.

I don't think some people realize the damage that was done to a lot of people over the years having to grow up in a world that systematically provides advantages to people of a certain racial/ethnic background (and class as well but we'll stick with race/ethnicity here). Just because we have a black president doesn't mean that all that is in the past now. I can understand why she would still be angry.

I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia.

But that's irrelevant as to how whites and AAs are treated generally in society today and in the past. I'm the pp you're responding to and I'm a direct descendent of abolitionists who ran the underground railroad in their town but I benefit enormously from white privilege. If we base all this on the people we descended from, well, I should get a free pass. But the reality is that I know other white people see me as one of them when I walk in the room so I get automatic acceptance. I know that my resume is more likely to be taken seriously because I have a white name -- a finding from rigorous social science research. I know -- also based on rigorous research conducted on implicit racism -- that many people will instantly see me as less threatening than an AA woman even if consciously they don't believe that they think that way.

These are all benefits I get from being white and that I enjoyed throughout my (now) long life. That's got nothing to do with whether your ancestors owned slaves or, like mine, helped people escape slavery. I'm sure that because you're an immigrant, pp, that you've suffered from your own struggles that were deeply unfair -- but one struggle you haven't had to face is the systemic discrimination that people with black skin have faced in this country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am black and I would never adopt a white baby. With all the unearned benefits that whites enjoy just for being white, they don't need my resources too. I would much rather take care of a black child because black children are less likely to be adopted and much more in need of stability in this racist, unfriendly society. I also don't think I could relate to a white child. I have a white husband, but taking care of a white child reminds me too much of playing nanny to a lazy white woman's spoiled child.

Please be a troll.

Nope, I am not a troll and I speak for most black people on this one. White people have always wanted black babies whether through adoption or outright theft. We don't want your kids though. I don't think white babies are cute and I would rather have no children than raise a white child. My husband (white) knows how I feel because I really do want to adopt after we are done having biological children. We have discussed the fact that our adopted children can be any race except white and he is not at all offended by how I feel. Think about it: Black people spend a lot of our lives subservient to white people when we leave our homes. Why would we want to continue this dynamic in our homes by adopting white babies? The photo posted by PP disgusts me. No way I will ever breastfeed and cater to a white child. Those days are behind black women.

Are you bio children at least half-cute?

Seriously, you are either a troll, or a deranged person. I'm reporting your filth to the admin. You don't deserve to open your mouth here.

You're reporting the legacy of slavery to the admin?

Yes, I don't get why people are so upset about this pp's point of view. It makes a lot of sense to me and I'm white. Some of her critics seem to think she should be colorblind but it hasn't been a colorblind world while that pp was growing up and it's still not a colorblind world. Plus when she is ready to adopt, there's going to be lots of white families competing for those white babies. Why should she get involved in that? When there are so many black kids that are waiting for forever homes?

Oh, I don't think anyone's condemning her for simply not wanting to adopt a white child. It's the need to slam the attractiveness of white children and express her disgust towards them. Similarly, I can't imagine anyone saying "I don't feel like I'm in a good position personally or culturally to adopt a black child " being condemned for that. But if they feel the need to go into gleeful detail about how unappealing they find black children… yeah, I'd judge that.

Okay, so that's not particularly attractive, I see your point. But given what it's like to grow up AA in this country, I totally understand why she would feel that way. Plus she's talking in the abstract. It doesn't seem to be a factor in her relationship with her family members.

For example, I was born in the 50s and when I was pregnant I wasn't sure if I wanted a boy. Even though my kid was born in the 90s, I didn't know if I could be fair to a boy who would come into the world with a lot more advantages just due to his gender and because when I was young, being a girl was like a punishment. (Didn't watch Madmen for years because I didn't want to be reminded of that.) I had a girl so the point is moot but I'm sure that if I'd had a boy I'd get over my concern and love that kid with all my heart. But I could see saying something negative about baby boys in the abstract, given my history. That's how I view the pp's assertion about white children.

I don't think some people realize the damage that was done to a lot of people over the years having to grow up in a world that systematically provides advantages to people of a certain racial/ethnic background (and class as well but we'll stick with race/ethnicity here). Just because we have a black president doesn't mean that all that is in the past now. I can understand why she would still be angry.

I'm the PP who reported the bitch. AA in this country need to remember that not everybody's ancestors here had something to do with the legacy of slavery. Yes, surprise-surprise, diversity goes both ways. Many ways, actually. I'm a first generation immigrant, and I--don't--want--to--hear--about--any--slavery--shit--EVER. Keep it for old money folks in Virginia.

Slavery is the history and legacy of this country. If you cannot handle it, then you should return to wherever you came from. You have no right to tell people whose families have been in this country farrrr longer than yours that we should simply not speak of what happened to our ancestors. You and your family chose to come over here, that's not our problem.

Pretty much. Worst of all, PP is too stupid to realize that there is a lot more than slavery at work. She needs to take her ignorant behind back wherever she came from.

Are you saying that, because someone suggested you take your ass back to Africa? LOL