Late 40s woman: age-appropriate men look so old

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They look so old because they don't take care of themselves as we do. I don't want to say how much I spend per year between laser treatments, skin care, hair coloring and cuts, pilates, gym, teeth, clothes, supplements, and clean food. I mean, it's kind of nuts. Of course, men my age will look much older than I do. I p

This is hyper delusional. No one is mis judging your age. Women may tell you that you look younger to flatter you and be a good friend. Men will flatter you for engagement and potential conquest. NO ONE IS ACTUALLY MIS-JUDGING YOUR AGE. I'm in my late 50s, have told dozens of female friends over the years how "young" they look but it has never once been true. I have never yet found out someone's true age afterward and been surprised.

Yes, some people are more well maintained than others. That is not the same as looking a different age. If I have a 50-year-old Ferrari in mint condition, I still do not think it is a brand new Ferrari. No one would.

Asian American here. I didn’t look much different at age 40 from 30. People often thought I was in my twenties and people often were shocked when I said I was 40. Then Covid happened and I’m now almost 50. At age 48, I definitely look forties and older than a short few years ago.

I have friends who are almost 50 who look fantastic. They put a lot of effort into their looks, had mommy makeovers, etc. I think it takes a lot of effort to maintain looking good in your fifties. I have never done Botox or laser therapy and salmon dna or other things some of my friends do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 47, and recently started dating again after a 24-year relationship. I'm shocked how old men my age look. I myself don't have wrinkles, saggy skin or gray hair. I'm fit and full of energy. But these guys, geeze... I don't want to date them myself!

This is heresy on DCUM where every woman looks at least ten years younger than her age, but I guarantee that you look older than you think.

I guarantee you if I post several photos of good looking women in their 30-40s you wouldn’t tell with any level of precision who is 39 and who is 49

Blurring pictures are different than real life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They look so old because they don't take care of themselves as we do. I don't want to say how much I spend per year between laser treatments, skin care, hair coloring and cuts, pilates, gym, teeth, clothes, supplements, and clean food. I mean, it's kind of nuts. Of course, men my age will look much older than I do. I p

This is hyper delusional. No one is mis judging your age. Women may tell you that you look younger to flatter you and be a good friend. Men will flatter you for engagement and potential conquest. NO ONE IS ACTUALLY MIS-JUDGING YOUR AGE. I'm in my late 50s, have told dozens of female friends over the years how "young" they look but it has never once been true. I have never yet found out someone's true age afterward and been surprised.

Yes, some people are more well maintained than others. That is not the same as looking a different age. If I have a 50-year-old Ferrari in mint condition, I still do not think it is a brand new Ferrari. No one would.

Asian American here. I didn’t look much different at age 40 from 30. People often thought I was in my twenties and people often were shocked when I said I was 40. Then Covid happened and I’m now almost 50. At age 48, I definitely look forties and older than a short few years ago.

I have friends who are almost 50 who look fantastic. They put a lot of effort into their looks, had mommy makeovers, etc. I think it takes a lot of effort to maintain looking good in your fifties. I have never done Botox or laser therapy and salmon dna or other things some of my friends do.

Does people or your specific ethnicity get confused about your age?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They look so old because they don't take care of themselves as we do. I don't want to say how much I spend per year between laser treatments, skin care, hair coloring and cuts, pilates, gym, teeth, clothes, supplements, and clean food. I mean, it's kind of nuts. Of course, men my age will look much older than I do. I p

This is hyper delusional. No one is mis judging your age. Women may tell you that you look younger to flatter you and be a good friend. Men will flatter you for engagement and potential conquest. NO ONE IS ACTUALLY MIS-JUDGING YOUR AGE. I'm in my late 50s, have told dozens of female friends over the years how "young" they look but it has never once been true. I have never yet found out someone's true age afterward and been surprised.

Yes, some people are more well maintained than others. That is not the same as looking a different age. If I have a 50-year-old Ferrari in mint condition, I still do not think it is a brand new Ferrari. No one would.

Asian American here. I didn’t look much different at age 40 from 30. People often thought I was in my twenties and people often were shocked when I said I was 40. Then Covid happened and I’m now almost 50. At age 48, I definitely look forties and older than a short few years ago.

I have friends who are almost 50 who look fantastic. They put a lot of effort into their looks, had mommy makeovers, etc. I think it takes a lot of effort to maintain looking good in your fifties. I have never done Botox or laser therapy and salmon dna or other things some of my friends do.

I'm the PP, and will agree that I definitely have to recalibrate for Asian ladies. But I am around plenty of Asian Americans, so that is easily done.

But yeah, if I were from white-bread middle America and saw a 50-year-old Asian lady, I would probably think she's 29 since I'm around obese cottage-cheesy diabetic arthritic buniony white ladies all day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They look so old because they don't take care of themselves as we do. I don't want to say how much I spend per year between laser treatments, skin care, hair coloring and cuts, pilates, gym, teeth, clothes, supplements, and clean food. I mean, it's kind of nuts. Of course, men my age will look much older than I do. I p

This is hyper delusional. No one is mis judging your age. Women may tell you that you look younger to flatter you and be a good friend. Men will flatter you for engagement and potential conquest. NO ONE IS ACTUALLY MIS-JUDGING YOUR AGE. I'm in my late 50s, have told dozens of female friends over the years how "young" they look but it has never once been true. I have never yet found out someone's true age afterward and been surprised.

Yes, some people are more well maintained than others. That is not the same as looking a different age. If I have a 50-year-old Ferrari in mint condition, I still do not think it is a brand new Ferrari. No one would.

Asian American here. I didn’t look much different at age 40 from 30. People often thought I was in my twenties and people often were shocked when I said I was 40. Then Covid happened and I’m now almost 50. At age 48, I definitely look forties and older than a short few years ago.

I have friends who are almost 50 who look fantastic. They put a lot of effort into their looks, had mommy makeovers, etc. I think it takes a lot of effort to maintain looking good in your fifties. I have never done Botox or laser therapy and salmon dna or other things some of my friends do.

I'm the PP, and will agree that I definitely have to recalibrate for Asian ladies. But I am around plenty of Asian Americans, so that is easily done.

But yeah, if I were from white-bread middle America and saw a 50-year-old Asian lady, I would probably think she's 29 since I'm around obese cottage-cheesy diabetic arthritic buniony white ladies all day.

Do you not understand that this is just racism? White people cannot discern physical differences in non-white people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 47, and recently started dating again after a 24-year relationship. I'm shocked how old men my age look. I myself don't have wrinkles, saggy skin or gray hair. I'm fit and full of energy. But these guys, geeze... I don't want to date them myself!

47 years old women look 47. What's your question OP?

[Anonymous]

I see why OP was dumped. She is delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They look so old because they don't take care of themselves as we do. I don't want to say how much I spend per year between laser treatments, skin care, hair coloring and cuts, pilates, gym, teeth, clothes, supplements, and clean food. I mean, it's kind of nuts. Of course, men my age will look much older than I do. I p

This is hyper delusional. No one is mis judging your age. Women may tell you that you look younger to flatter you and be a good friend. Men will flatter you for engagement and potential conquest. NO ONE IS ACTUALLY MIS-JUDGING YOUR AGE. I'm in my late 50s, have told dozens of female friends over the years how "young" they look but it has never once been true. I have never yet found out someone's true age afterward and been surprised.

Yes, some people are more well maintained than others. That is not the same as looking a different age. If I have a 50-year-old Ferrari in mint condition, I still do not think it is a brand new Ferrari. No one would.

Not that PP but where in that post did they say they didn't look their age?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see why OP was dumped. She is delusional.

A well-kept, wealthy 48-year-old woman can date whoever she wants - a hot thirty year old bar tender, an age-appropriate peer, a super wealthy 60-year-old. That's the dating market for a pretty, wealthy woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Now consider the early 20s women on this forum who claim that they are just magnetically attracted to men over the age of 50, and cross-my-heart it has nothing to do with their money.

lol. It’s all about money

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an athletic woman who works out. I don’t mind him being bold and wrinkled but athletic type body is a must for me

I did try not to be shallow and dated chubby. Bedroom action was truly disgusting to me all that jelly awkward movements and smells. So I will continue using toys until and unless I meet someone I truly want physically

Omg my condolences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is cope

I’m a early 40’s guy and at my run club and gym it’s super common to see dudes in their 40s and 50s with visible abs, pretty decent skin, etc

It is really rare to see women in similar shape at the same age.

Our run club has a lot of ex college athletes and lot of the participants who are in the sub 730 split group for our 13+ mile run groups are mostly under 30 women, dudes of various ages and very very few over 40 women

There are def over 50 women who are smoke shows but it is really rare.

I don’t see them at our club, at our gym, or at our firm.

There are some fitness instructors in my city over 50 I can think of that are snatched but I see random 50+ year old dudes at my firm and industry who are really fit, hit lifetime gym daily before or after work… etc

Where is this run club?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

DP. She's not mocking their age. She's turned off by how they completely let themselves go. It's true.

OP, it used to be a career was all a man had to bring to the table. Men 40+ and even many under 40 still feel entitled to that low threshold. Remember "King of Queens"? A fat schlubby husband always screwing things up was the cultural equivalent of a total package wife. That's the world they want to live in. Men will do anything to avoid updating their priors.

Careful with the ones who actually take care of themselves and keep fit. They're often misogynistic and ultra mad at women. They hate that they have to make an effort to be competitive on the market.

Please, as a woman, tell the men on this board how they think and what they feel. The truth is that your hostility toward men is warping your judgment.

Let's focus on you, for a moment. Do you receive spousal support (and/or child support)? Are you on the market, bagging on men, while someone else is providing a material share of your income? If so, try giving your exDH most (if not all) of the support back and let him spend it on making himself attractive. Then, let's see how it goes.

No it’s an entitlement

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a 40F and notice a huge variety in how men look. I've recently gone out with a 44 year old man who is extremely fit, has all his hair, good skin, and is well groomed, etc. I've also gone out with 40 year old men who look scrubby. I think, like with women, your 40s are where the differences between men who take good care of themselves and men who don't really start to become apparent. From my experience, a robust fitness routine truly makes a difference at this age.

+ skin care, good teeth and some fashion sense.

You're right.. but it's not that easy for men. Where do I go to get skin care products and who do I ask? I'm clueless, and the stores I've been to, like Sephora (with my DDs) seem oriented towards women.

Fashion sense is similar -- go to the mall and notice how many of the clothing stores are for women vs men. There's not much for men to choose from. Even at a place like Zara, the mens section is 1/3 the women's section.

Not saying it's impossible but it's not easy either.

It's plenty easy. But if you can't find a decent outfit odds are you can't find a clit either. Find a friend or do some online research on both counts.

🏴‍☠️

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 47, and recently started dating again after a 24-year relationship. I'm shocked how old men my age look. I myself don't have wrinkles, saggy skin or gray hair. I'm fit and full of energy. But these guys, geeze... I don't want to date them myself!

call me.