Ex Can’t Do School Logistics Anymore — Advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

Then, why does he not want before and aftercare - which would cover the time he needs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

Then, why does he not want before and aftercare - which would cover the time he needs?

Because he would have to pay for it, and he stupidly got himself more children than he can afford.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

Then, why does he not want before and aftercare - which would cover the time he needs?

Because he would have to pay for it, and he stupidly got himself more children than he can afford.

He is paying child support and having the kids half time. That’s a lot. He should go back to court and get a modification for child care and the new child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

What does she do for her two days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is some woman hating troll on this thread. OP appears to be a working mom that has adjusted her schedule so that she can care for her kids and work. He moved away, he is not doing most of the work, he has started a new family. It is not reasonable to uproot the kids to make his life easier.

OP has been nothing but reasonable. She started this thread because she is trying to put her children first and she is worried that flaky, yes flaky, affair having, new partner, new baby, dad will not figure it out.

Many supportive posters are reminding OP that her ex is an adult that is responsible for his children and, as a minimum, he needs to actually ask for help if he needs it.

OP - it is hard balancing protecting your kids and holding boundaries with an ex. Kudos to you.

He has the kids the majority of the school week. Op isn’t reasonable at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

Their mom is being offered a few extra hours and refusing it. They aren’t moving away by changing schools. Mom still has her long weekends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

Read the OP. This is the schedule that the Dad wanted because it worked for his work schedule. He and his baby mama probably like having most weekends child free. Your characterization of the situation as somehow unfair to the poor out upon dad is delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

Read the OP. This is the schedule that the Dad wanted because it worked for his work schedule. He and his baby mama probably like having most weekends child free. Your characterization of the situation as somehow unfair to the poor out upon dad is delusional.

Baby mama one likes her weekdays free. Sounds like neither should be parenting per your posts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

Read the OP. This is the schedule that the Dad wanted because it worked for his work schedule. He and his baby mama probably like having most weekends child free. Your characterization of the situation as somehow unfair to the poor out upon dad is delusional.

Baby mama one likes her weekdays free. Sounds like neither should be parenting per your posts.

OP here to set the record straight, since I can’t believe you are all still debating this like you know what’s going on, and with an update:

My ex has the kids M after school, and all day T. He takes them to school on W, where I have them W after school until M when I take them to school. I take them to school THREE days a week.

He has given up his weekdays, for now, until he can “figure something out”. If by next school year he can’t come up with a permanent plan, I will take him to court and figure out custody and CS arrangements, but it’s not a fight I’m interested in having now. As I said, I don’t care about the money, I just want my kids to feel secure.

The audacity of some of you calling me selfish and only caring about myself, shame on you. Did you read something that resonated with you? Feeling exposed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

Read the OP. This is the schedule that the Dad wanted because it worked for his work schedule. He and his baby mama probably like having most weekends child free. Your characterization of the situation as somehow unfair to the poor out upon dad is delusional.

Baby mama one likes her weekdays free. Sounds like neither should be parenting per your posts.

OP here to set the record straight, since I can’t believe you are all still debating this like you know what’s going on, and with an update:

My ex has the kids M after school, and all day T. He takes them to school on W, where I have them W after school until M when I take them to school. I take them to school THREE days a week.

He has given up his weekdays, for now, until he can “figure something out”. If by next school year he can’t come up with a permanent plan, I will take him to court and figure out custody and CS arrangements, but it’s not a fight I’m interested in having now. As I said, I don’t care about the money, I just want my kids to feel secure.

The audacity of some of you calling me selfish and only caring about myself, shame on you. Did you read something that resonated with you? Feeling exposed?

Wow. OP, it’s sad to read your response because exDH (and the other commenters!) dragged you through a lot of grief and he obviously wasn’t actually motivated to have that time in the first place. With my STBX, I have to keep reminding myself that if he wanted to, he would. I’m sorry you got dragged through his brief flash of performative parenting and I’m sorry he doesn’t care about his kids enough to have tried to find a nanny or driver or make any other arrangements.

-ex of someone who’s always saying he’s going to “figure something out”, but what he really means is “I’ll say the right things, hope you make the effort to fix everything for me, and then I reserve the right after to badmouth you even though this is the outcome I actually want”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

Read the OP. This is the schedule that the Dad wanted because it worked for his work schedule. He and his baby mama probably like having most weekends child free. Your characterization of the situation as somehow unfair to the poor out upon dad is delusional.

Baby mama one likes her weekdays free. Sounds like neither should be parenting per your posts.

OP here to set the record straight, since I can’t believe you are all still debating this like you know what’s going on, and with an update:

My ex has the kids M after school, and all day T. He takes them to school on W, where I have them W after school until M when I take them to school. I take them to school THREE days a week.

He has given up his weekdays, for now, until he can “figure something out”. If by next school year he can’t come up with a permanent plan, I will take him to court and figure out custody and CS arrangements, but it’s not a fight I’m interested in having now. As I said, I don’t care about the money, I just want my kids to feel secure.

The audacity of some of you calling me selfish and only caring about myself, shame on you. Did you read something that resonated with you? Feeling exposed?

🦗 🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗

Where did everyone go?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: So, it seems like right now he has them M T W and one weekend a month. Honestly OP, I think that is good for you-you're getting most of the weekends.
I wouldn't want to change that, and I'd probably just have him drop the kids off at your house on your days and you take them to school like you do on your days. Is that making it easier for him? Yes. Is it keeping things consistent for the kids and giving you more time with them? Also Yes.

OP should only do this if it won’t compromise her job. Why should she have to bear the entire burden of school pickup and drop offs? If she agrees to this she should be compensated for it in increase child support or through her xDH paying for an after school sitter. At the end of the day it is the xDH’s responsibility to coordinate *and pay for* any necessary childcare on his custody days rather than foisting it on OP. And of course this is not necessarily better for small kids as it means the kids will transition between parents and houses every day.

Because she's insisting the kids go to school at her house and he has them three days a week and she has them two days a week. What does she do on her days? She should share the child care costs if he has to pay someone especially when he's paying child support. Child care expenses are caculated with child support so if his expenses increase, she could be responsible for some of that increase.

The better solution is for the kids to go to school near his house, as they are there more during the week. Adding another day care provider or nanny is another transition for the kisd so your comments make no sense.

If she doesn't want the kids during the week, he can keep them m-f and she can have them s-s.

She is “insisting” the kids go to school they have gone to historically which would remain fine had their father not voluntarily (not for a job) chosen to move further from his kids.

In general, courts —and most adults — prioritize stability for kids and the status quo, and take a dim view of parents voluntarily moving further from their children.

These are young kids. They will be fine changing schools. Mom can step up and help at least till the end of the school year, then hopefully he can get child care or they can come to another arrangement, like kids go to school near him.

Mom refuses to be in any way flexible and sets him up to fail. If he takes a job with reduced pay, will she be ok with reduced child support? Of course not. He also has equal kid expenses in his home on top of that child support. He's doing his share. She can step up a little. She has weekends, so she has the easy fun time.

Oh FFS! He set himself up to fail by having another child when he clearly cannot handle being father of 3. She does not owe it to him to compensate for his poor judgement. At all.

The issue isn't the baby, you are just upset he remarried and had another child. The issue is his work schedule. And, in some states, he can get the child support reduced for having more kids. If she will not help, it speaks to her parenting. What kind of mother would turn down an extra two hours with her kids?

What kind of a father would fail to figure out how to provide childcare for his kids on his custody days?? Or move far away from their school after breaking up their family with an affair.

Fathers with custody don't have to drive that distance back and forth and they'd have the kids at a closer school. He has to work. So, it makes sense for the kids to go to school near him. She's refusing to work with him at all and that hurts the kids. Most people cannot just work 4-5 hours day.

She has to work too … and I’m sorry you cannot wrap your head around this but it is the responsibility of the custodial parent to figure out how to get the kids to school on their days.

She is the custodial parent as she has more time and gets child support. The best way to figure it out is to change schools.

You make no sense. It is not in the best interest of the children to change schools, to make life easier for their father, who chose to move away from his 2 kids, and closer to his girlfriend, in advance of becoming a parent to his new baby. The OP is the stable parent, and it would harm the kids to move away from their friends and their mother.

You don’t know anything and are making it up as you go. If dad has the kids three school days a week he is primary parent as that’s the harder part and handling the academics. Mom is the fun parent with Friday to Sunday. It makes sense to move the kids near dad for school.

Read the OP. This is the schedule that the Dad wanted because it worked for his work schedule. He and his baby mama probably like having most weekends child free. Your characterization of the situation as somehow unfair to the poor out upon dad is delusional.

Baby mama one likes her weekdays free. Sounds like neither should be parenting per your posts.

OP here to set the record straight, since I can’t believe you are all still debating this like you know what’s going on, and with an update:

My ex has the kids M after school, and all day T. He takes them to school on W, where I have them W after school until M when I take them to school. I take them to school THREE days a week.

He has given up his weekdays, for now, until he can “figure something out”. If by next school year he can’t come up with a permanent plan, I will take him to court and figure out custody and CS arrangements, but it’s not a fight I’m interested in having now. As I said, I don’t care about the money, I just want my kids to feel secure.

The audacity of some of you calling me selfish and only caring about myself, shame on you. Did you read something that resonated with you? Feeling exposed?

Shame on you for not working with him at all. You do want a fight as you are threatening court and not working with him at all. Just be honest, you want more child support and him to never see the kids again.