Mom brings 11 yr. Old son in women's changing room at pool

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread is really nutso. You people are truly quixotic. 11 year olds at the pool with parents do not pose any threat to anyone. Nudity is not scandalous. Grow up.

Then why can’t the 11 yo go in the men’s changing room?

Because men are perverted

Which is why women don't want them in the women's changing room.

[Anonymous]

Take him to planet fitness where they don’t care how women feel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Actually changing butt ass naked in a pool bathroom is for weirdos anyway. Show up in your gear and don’t leave till you’re dry.

My mother always held a towel up when I changed in the locker room when I changed if there was no stall. I do question the judgment of these mothers who let their girls change out in the open like that. There are also ways to change quickly while covered up.

[Anonymous]

Totally inappropriate for tween boys to be in the women’s dressing room or for tween girls to be in the men’s room.

What on earth?

If your kid can’t use the dressing room alone for whatever reason you need to come up with an alternative that isn’t making your 11 year old son come into the changing room with you. It puts the boy and the women and girls using the room in a very uncomfortable situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Totally inappropriate for tween boys to be in the women’s dressing room or for tween girls to be in the men’s room.

What on earth?

If your kid can’t use the dressing room alone for whatever reason you need to come up with an alternative that isn’t making your 11 year old son come into the changing room with you. It puts the boy and the women and girls using the room in a very uncomfortable situation.

I mean, yes, but gyms now allow fully grown men to walk in whenever they want so the horse is already out of the barn. An 11-year-old is nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I do not care who is in the room when I change. We all have body parts… an 11 year old boy changing in the girls room with his mother is no big deal. Do I think he is going rape me? No. Do I think he will stare at me? Sure. And then life moves on.

It's not a big deal to you as a grown woman who is not a peer. It is a big deal to my 11 year old pre-pubescent DD who goes to school with the kid. And yes, at our pool we have had a 10 year old boy regularly come into the women's locker room with his mom while my 8 year old DD and her friends were changing. He would sit on a bench and eat a popsicle and stare at the girls as they changed between swim practice and tennis. He had NO business in there.

The situation was 100% not ok and we did have to say something to the manager because the mom ignored other mom's requests to get him out of there. The Board read the mom the riot act and she started using the standalone family bathroom/changing room.

Have your kids wear their suit to the pool and change at home or in a stall. I don't get people like you who change out in the open or tell your kids to. Mine don't change or shower at the pool except a rare occasion.

My 7 year old changes after swim (indoor pool) in the winter and has me hold a towel up bc there are 4 and 5 year old boys nearby in the girls locker room when their moms take them. She would be horrified to see a classmate in there or even see her in underwear. There is no family changing room and no way to the pool except through locker rooms. Usually DH and I both go, but sometimes I take both kids and I just try to hurry my 4 year old boy quickly through the girls locker room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I do not care who is in the room when I change. We all have body parts… an 11 year old boy changing in the girls room with his mother is no big deal. Do I think he is going rape me? No. Do I think he will stare at me? Sure. And then life moves on.

It's not a big deal to you as a grown woman who is not a peer. It is a big deal to my 11 year old pre-pubescent DD who goes to school with the kid. And yes, at our pool we have had a 10 year old boy regularly come into the women's locker room with his mom while my 8 year old DD and her friends were changing. He would sit on a bench and eat a popsicle and stare at the girls as they changed between swim practice and tennis. He had NO business in there.

The situation was 100% not ok and we did have to say something to the manager because the mom ignored other mom's requests to get him out of there. The Board read the mom the riot act and she started using the standalone family bathroom/changing room.

Have your kids wear their suit to the pool and change at home or in a stall. I don't get people like you who change out in the open or tell your kids to. Mine don't change or shower at the pool except a rare occasion.

My 7 year old changes after swim (indoor pool) in the winter and has me hold a towel up bc there are 4 and 5 year old boys nearby in the girls locker room when their moms take them. She would be horrified to see a classmate in there or even see her in underwear. There is no family changing room and no way to the pool except through locker rooms. Usually DH and I both go, but sometimes I take both kids and I just try to hurry my 4 year old boy quickly through the girls locker room.

What do you expect them to do with young kids?

Get a swim parka and change at home. That’s what we do. Locker rooms are not safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A few years ago I was at Disney World, in the "land" section of Epcot. I was using the restroom and saw a boy that looked about 12-13 with his mom. They walked out about the same time as me, and waiting outside for them were three adult men (I'm assuming Dad, Grandpa, and maybe an uncle?)

As a mom of boys, I think 13 is old enough to use a restroom alone--but even if this family wasn't comfortable with that, why couldn't one of these men have brought him into the mens room?

Because men are incapable of ensuring basic hygiene like making sure the kids feet don’t touch nasty water on the floor or the floor.

[Anonymous]

Yes I am

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your 12 year old son is willingly going to the ladies room with mommy to go peepee, then you have utterly failed as a parent.

This. If your child is old enough to masturbate, they should not be in the opposite gender’s locker room.

Nudity is not inherently sexual. Our culture has created the problem. Why make a culture that causes so many people to be uncomfortable? Stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've discussed this before and most agree that using a family changing room, if available, or bring boys already in swim trunks. An 11 yr old, who is not SN, should not be brought into women's changing room at pool or restroom in a public place. Personally, I do not even thing a SN 11 yr. old boy should be in women changing room or rest room.

https://nypost.com/2024/04/05/lifestyle/mom-divides-parents-after-bringing-her-11-year-old-son-into-a-womens-changing-room/

No way and you should report her. I have never been any where it is all right to bring in 11 year old boy to a changing room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We've discussed this before and most agree that using a family changing room, if available, or bring boys already in swim trunks. An 11 yr old, who is not SN, should not be brought into women's changing room at pool or restroom in a public place. Personally, I do not even thing a SN 11 yr. old boy should be in women changing room or rest room.

https://nypost.com/2024/04/05/lifestyle/mom-divides-parents-after-bringing-her-11-year-old-son-into-a-womens-changing-room/

No way and you should report her. I have never been any where it is all right to bring in 11 year old boy to a changing room.

You don't know what SN they have if that is a boy or girl or how they identify themselves. It's not like they are walking around with a scarlet letter. Try not to be transphobic you are a grown-ass adult and should emphathize unless of course you have SN yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We've discussed this before and most agree that using a family changing room, if available, or bring boys already in swim trunks. An 11 yr old, who is not SN, should not be brought into women's changing room at pool or restroom in a public place. Personally, I do not even thing a SN 11 yr. old boy should be in women changing room or rest room.

https://nypost.com/2024/04/05/lifestyle/mom-divides-parents-after-bringing-her-11-year-old-son-into-a-womens-changing-room/

No way and you should report her. I have never been any where it is all right to bring in 11 year old boy to a changing room.

Why is the U.S. so puritan about nudity?

Someone seeing you naked, or you seeing someone else naked doesn’t need to be sexual or weird.

This goes for both sides of this debate, lord help us if someone happens to simply see your neurotypical able-to-speak-up-for-themself kid naked in a communal CHANGING room full of other people. Sight is equal to physical violence apparently now in this context 😭

And lord also up us is a prepubescent child happens to see his Mother’s peers naked in a changing room as well. The older ladies are also apparently going to be just as scarred by being looked at 😭

Seriously y’all. Follow the rules of the pool and if you see someone else not following the rules then complain to staff. It’s not hard and there’s so much more stuff worth being upset and worried about in the world than this. 🤦

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well how do you know he didn’t identify as female? The world we live in today, we should install all family restrooms. Because kids do get assaulted. So yes, if grown men can go into a female changing room, an 11 yo can as well. Also America is so prudish. I think going to pee alone at 11 or even younger is very different from going to actually change. And I linger right outside when my boys go in to pew.

Let’s not fear monger. The odds of your child being assaulted in a public restroom are extremely low. Also you can certainly teach your child to yell or run whenever someone approaches them in a bathroom. My 5 yo and 7 yo boys use the boys room. We teach boundaries and bathing suit areas/off limits touching starting around age 4. We make it clear no one should talk to or touch you in the bathroom. Statistically it’s much more likely a trusted adult (counselor, family friend) will try this so we make it clear that only his parents or doctor with a parent present are allowed to touch them in bathing suit areas.

[Anonymous]

Maybe this boy identified as a girl. Lots of bathrooms are unisex nowadays. Go in your stall and myob.