My sister and BIL want me to ask my husband to get their son a lucrative job

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is anyone here promoting nepotism?!

Because it is how people get a start or a leg up. Because it never going away and you might as well use it to your advantage. You must be super young or super naive if you don't think that's how the most powerful people do it.

I wish I had that. I work for someone who is very well-connected. About a month ago, someone who was VERY high up in the previous administration asked my boss to help his 40 year old daughter find a job. Presumably he is better connected but I guess he wants there to be an appearance that he didn't get his kid a job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is anyone here promoting nepotism?!

Her husband already uses his connections to get kids jobs. He's done it repeatedly. People are promoting treating your family as least as well as random friends' kids.

If the post was "My sister and BIL want me to ask my husband to get their son a lucrative job but he thinks it's unethical to help someone get an in at their firm" the response would be a lot different than it is for "but he didn't grow up rich so I don't think he deserves any help, even though he's at a top university that prints out finance bros at graduation like a mint".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your nephew has a degree from Duke he is qualified to be a finance bro, like all the other Duke finance bros.

Especially considering he got into Duke as a MC candidate!

It is an accomplishment but kids are admitted into college in December of their senior year when they're age 17. It is now nearly March 2024. December 2019 is ancient history. If you have nothing relevant or impressive in those 4.5 years since submitting college applications, how do you deserve a job kids kill for?

I mean people are getting jobs from something that happened 21 years ago — who their parents were.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your nephew has a degree from Duke he is qualified to be a finance bro, like all the other Duke finance bros.

Especially considering he got into Duke as a MC candidate!

It is an accomplishment but kids are admitted into college in December of their senior year when they're age 17. It is now nearly March 2024. December 2019 is ancient history. If you have nothing relevant or impressive in those 4.5 years since submitting college applications, how do you deserve a job kids kill for?

I mean people are getting jobs from something that happened 21 years ago — who their parents were.

Why are you suggesting affluent students with connected parents are undeserving high born slackers? Affluent teens are often high motor, really ambitious students. David Brooks wrote a viral essay about such students over 20 years ago in The Atlantic:

The Organization Kid

The young men and women of America's future elite work their laptops to the bone, rarely question authority, and happily accept their positions at the top of the heap as part of the natural order of life

By David Brooks

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2001/04/the-organization-kid/302164/

Such students at the best colleges are still often shut out from these top banking jobs because they are ultra competitive and the pay is so extravagant.

[Anonymous]

My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is our oldest nephew and I'm a SAHM, so I've never been through this before. Nephew is graduating from college. Sister and BIL are middle class. I'm a bit uncomfortable with my husband putting his neck out for an in-law who honestly doesn't seem deserving of a backdoor to a lucrative job. Or is this just how the world works and I should encourage my husband to help? My husband has helped a couple of close friends' kids, but they all had pretty impressive CVs, so I don't think they really even needed the lift.

I have only read the OP's opening post in this long thread.

OP: Remember: No good deed goes unpunished.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

Is he communicative and polished?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

What is his GPA? He had no relevant training or summer internships? And OP's niece or nephew is not a Division 1 Big Ten varsity athlete.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your nephew has a degree from Duke he is qualified to be a finance bro, like all the other Duke finance bros.

Especially considering he got into Duke as a MC candidate!

It is an accomplishment but kids are admitted into college in December of their senior year when they're age 17. It is now nearly March 2024. December 2019 is ancient history. If you have nothing relevant or impressive in those 4.5 years since submitting college applications, how do you deserve a job kids kill for?

I mean people are getting jobs from something that happened 21 years ago — who their parents were.

Why are you suggesting affluent students with connected parents are undeserving high born slackers? Affluent teens are often high motor, really ambitious students. David Brooks wrote a viral essay about such students over 20 years ago in The Atlantic:

The Organization Kid

The young men and women of America's future elite work their laptops to the bone, rarely question authority, and happily accept their positions at the top of the heap as part of the natural order of life

By David Brooks

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2001/04/the-organization-kid/302164/

Such students at the best colleges are still often shut out from these top banking jobs because they are ultra competitive and the pay is so extravagant.

You're quoting David Brooks, the token Republican at the NYT who only hasn't been fired because all the other candidates are crazy?

https://statmodeling.stat.columbia.edu/2015/06/16/the-david-brooks-files-how-many-uncorrected-mistakes-does-it-take-to-be-discredited/

I notice in his survey of these hardworking kids none of them hold on-campus jobs to pay tuition...

Not to mention his whole marriage snafu:

https://medium.com/crows-feet/why-you-probably-shouldnt-listen-to-david-brooks-about-marriage-915d1f64bc41

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

What is his GPA? He had no relevant training or summer internships? And OP's niece or nephew is not a Division 1 Big Ten varsity athlete.

GPA: 2.9

Major: business administration

Summer internships: He did have an internship, an 11-week program, in the summer of his sophomore and junior year with two different investment firms from an alumni in the athletic department. They also gave him six weeks off to train for his sports so that he could get ready for fall season, but he still got paid for those six weeks that he didn't work. He got those internships through connections

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

What is his GPA? He had no relevant training or summer internships? And OP's niece or nephew is not a Division 1 Big Ten varsity athlete.

GPA: 2.9

Major: business administration

Summer internships: He did have an internship, an 11-week program, in the summer of his sophomore and junior year with two different investment firms from an alumni in the athletic department. They also gave him six weeks off to train for his sports so that he could get ready for fall season, but he still got paid for those six weeks that he didn't work. He got those internships through connections

So he plays what seems like a varsity sports and is majoring in… what economics? Pretty sure Duke doesn’t have an undergrad business major.

Let me guess. His tuition is dependent on playing the sport, I’m guessing the MC BIL can’t afford full freight tuition.

If you don’t see how far your nephew has come, I really want to hear your story of academic and career success, since you also came from less than?

[Anonymous]

There is such a wide array of Wall Street jobs. Front office, back office, buy side, sell side, hyper-selective gigs to boiler rooms full of nitwit state school frat bros. 'Working in finance' doesn't automatically mean a 22 year old kid is in investment banking at Goldman Sachs and will make $120,000 base and bonus for $160,000 plus annual gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

What is his GPA? He had no relevant training or summer internships? And OP's niece or nephew is not a Division 1 Big Ten varsity athlete.

GPA: 2.9

Major: business administration

Summer internships: He did have an internship, an 11-week program, in the summer of his sophomore and junior year with two different investment firms from an alumni in the athletic department. They also gave him six weeks off to train for his sports so that he could get ready for fall season, but he still got paid for those six weeks that he didn't work. He got those internships through connections

So he plays what seems like a varsity sports and is majoring in… what economics? Pretty sure Duke doesn’t have an undergrad business major.

Let me guess. His tuition is dependent on playing the sport, I’m guessing the MC BIL can’t afford full freight tuition.

If you don’t see how far your nephew has come, I really want to hear your story of academic and career success, since you also came from less than?

She didn't need all that. She married well. Duhh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

What is his GPA? He had no relevant training or summer internships? And OP's niece or nephew is not a Division 1 Big Ten varsity athlete.

GPA: 2.9

Major: business administration

Summer internships: He did have an internship, an 11-week program, in the summer of his sophomore and junior year with two different investment firms from an alumni in the athletic department. They also gave him six weeks off to train for his sports so that he could get ready for fall season, but he still got paid for those six weeks that he didn't work. He got those internships through connections

So he plays what seems like a varsity sports and is majoring in… what economics? Pretty sure Duke doesn’t have an undergrad business major.

Let me guess. His tuition is dependent on playing the sport, I’m guessing the MC BIL can’t afford full freight tuition.

If you don’t see how far your nephew has come, I really want to hear your story of academic and career success, since you also came from less than?

Duke has an Economics B.A. But if I'm reading Government Scorecard data correctly, the average Duke graduate several years after graduation only makes $97,000. OP says her nephew is a mediocre student. So a mediocre student should be handed a job paying more than their harder working classmates will hope to make four or five years from now? Doesn't seem right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS recently received a job offer from an investment company. He was selected over five qualified Ivy grads, according to his boss, because he is a D1 athlete at a state school, think of Purdue or Indiana, and was sponsored by an EVP of the company who also played the same sport at the same school as DS. Would he get that job without connections? Of course NOT.

What is his GPA? He had no relevant training or summer internships? And OP's niece or nephew is not a Division 1 Big Ten varsity athlete.

GPA: 2.9

Major: business administration

Summer internships: He did have an internship, an 11-week program, in the summer of his sophomore and junior year with two different investment firms from an alumni in the athletic department. They also gave him six weeks off to train for his sports so that he could get ready for fall season, but he still got paid for those six weeks that he didn't work. He got those internships through connections

So he plays what seems like a varsity sports and is majoring in… what economics? Pretty sure Duke doesn’t have an undergrad business major.

Let me guess. His tuition is dependent on playing the sport, I’m guessing the MC BIL can’t afford full freight tuition.

If you don’t see how far your nephew has come, I really want to hear your story of academic and career success, since you also came from less than?

I don't think that was OP.