Perimenopause and no sex drive

[Anonymous]

I’m 46 and on HRT but have zero drive with DH. Masterbating to others works but nothing turns me on with DH. Will this pass? Been on HRT for 9 months and nothing.

[Anonymous]

Does HRT include testosterone ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does HRT include testosterone ?

+1 Testosterone makes a huge difference.

[Anonymous]

yeah, needs to have T otherwise add it please.

[Anonymous]

My HRT includes testosterone, and I hate being a downer, but while T *massively* increased my sex drive, I still did not want sex with my boyfriend at the time. So much of sex is mental, and I didn’t desire him specifically for many reasons (lack of an emotional connection, he wasn’t very good in bed and wasn’t interested in exploring the things I wanted to try, etc).

So T may or may not help with your desire for you husband. I’d also do some reflecting on if you’re getting the kind of sex you even want - I didn’t realize until I was nearly 40 that most of the sex I had with men wasn’t sex I enjoyed, it was for them.

Now, T plus a guy you have great sexual chemistry with is INSANE. highly recommend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:yeah, needs to have T otherwise add it please.

Not OP but my doc only prescribed estrogen + progesterone. No T. How to get?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:yeah, needs to have T otherwise add it please.

Not OP but my doc only prescribed estrogen + progesterone. No T. How to get?

Ask the doctor

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 46 and on HRT but have zero drive with DH. Masterbating to others works but nothing turns me on with DH. Will this pass? Been on HRT for 9 months and nothing.

If masturbating to others works it doesn’t sound like a hormone problem. It sounds like a husband problem!

I also think it’s common to get sexually bored of a husband especially if he’s not very good at sex.

[Anonymous]

After nine months with no luck…
You should follow up w your doctor.

[Anonymous]

HRT is doing nothing for my sex drive but Testosterone is not part of it. I wonder if it should be?
I think after almost 20 years of some issues never resolved, sex drive for DH may not be increased. Love him, but reallly don't have the energy to want to give it to him regularly. We do 1x per week, about half that time is enjoyable, the other half i am hopeful but really am not satisified or into it at all * he has no idea but it is getting harder to 'fake' being into it.

[Anonymous]

Get over it Op. It's mental.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My HRT includes testosterone, and I hate being a downer, but while T *massively* increased my sex drive, I still did not want sex with my boyfriend at the time. So much of sex is mental, and I didn’t desire him specifically for many reasons (lack of an emotional connection, he wasn’t very good in bed and wasn’t interested in exploring the things I wanted to try, etc).

So T may or may not help with your desire for you husband. I’d also do some reflecting on if you’re getting the kind of sex you even want - I didn’t realize until I was nearly 40 that most of the sex I had with men wasn’t sex I enjoyed, it was for them.

Now, T plus a guy you have great sexual chemistry with is INSANE. highly recommend.

I don’t know about T (the evidence is not clear) but I totally agree with you about the experience of sex being more for the man in my past. It kind of takes a deliberate effort to make it about pleasing yourself.

[Anonymous]

Do you fantasize while you are with your DH? Try it!

[Anonymous]

You need a new partner. Not natural to be with the same man that long. Sorry. It sucks. I'm with you.

[Anonymous]

Do you still love your husband? If not, then do some introspection about that. He deserves to be with someone who loves him. If you don't then let him go. And when you divorce, don't take him to the cleaners. You're the one who dropped the ball here, not him, so he shouldn't be screwed because you flaked on the marriage.