Preparing for first confession after many years, and having an issue.

[Anonymous]

I converted to Catholicism about ten years ago but have not been to confession in several years. I felt a pull to go back but upon doing the examination of conscience I’m having a bit of a crisis over whether I can continue being Catholic at all.

I obviously have things to confess (missing mass, sex prior to marriage, rudeness, selfishness, taking the Lord’s name in vain) but the issue I am stuck on is contraception. I’ve been doing research and it sunk in that this is a mortal sin, so essentially if I go and confess but continue keeping my IUD in I’m still sinning and confession is almost pointless. I am not in the position to have a child. I’m not sure where this feeling of guilt came from or what I should tell the priest, but this is the one mortal ‘sin’ I don’t think I’ll be able to stop doing.

My research has made me terrified I am going to hell over this issue. Has anyone dealt with something like this in confession?

[Anonymous]

The vast majority of Catholics use birth control.

[Anonymous]

sounds like maybe catholicism isn't for you.

[Anonymous]

Please go talk to the priest. I am going to guess this is a common issue they deal with.

It is great that you are actually doing a real examination of conscience. I don't think the IUD use is any different than continued sex before marriage, which it sounds like you want to continue (thus the need for the IUD). So I think the premarital sex is the underlying issue in your case. Talk to your priest. talk to more than one priest. Read up on Catholic teaching on premarital sex and see if anything resonates with you.

[Anonymous]

You are right on the facts as presented by the Roman church. Confession is valid when one has a contrite heart and "full purpose of amendment of life". Obviously you have a soft heart, but you do not intend to conform you life to RC teaching on this issue.

But be comforted. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. The Roman church may well be wrong on this issue. They say they are infallible on doctrine, but the rest of Christendom disagrees. You are trusting Christ to stand in your place at judgment not only for those sins that you have carefully documented during confession, but also for errors in judgment and weakness of the flesh and will.

[Anonymous]

Religion is a human construct. Pick what works for you from the religion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please go talk to the priest. I am going to guess this is a common issue they deal with.

It is great that you are actually doing a real examination of conscience. I don't think the IUD use is any different than continued sex before marriage, which it sounds like you want to continue (thus the need for the IUD). So I think the premarital sex is the underlying issue in your case. Talk to your priest. talk to more than one priest. Read up on Catholic teaching on premarital sex and see if anything resonates with you.

I am married now. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are right on the facts as presented by the Roman church. Confession is valid when one has a contrite heart and "full purpose of amendment of life". Obviously you have a soft heart, but you do not intend to conform you life to RC teaching on this issue.

But be comforted. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. The Roman church may well be wrong on this issue. They say they are infallible on doctrine, but the rest of Christendom disagrees. You are trusting Christ to stand in your place at judgment not only for those sins that you have carefully documented during confession, but also for errors in judgment and weakness of the flesh and will.

Thank you <3

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I converted to Catholicism about ten years ago but have not been to confession in several years. I felt a pull to go back but upon doing the examination of conscience I’m having a bit of a crisis over whether I can continue being Catholic at all.

I obviously have things to confess (missing mass, sex prior to marriage, rudeness, selfishness, taking the Lord’s name in vain) but the issue I am stuck on is contraception. I’ve been doing research and it sunk in that this is a mortal sin, so essentially if I go and confess but continue keeping my IUD in I’m still sinning and confession is almost pointless. I am not in the position to have a child. I’m not sure where this feeling of guilt came from or what I should tell the priest, but this is the one mortal ‘sin’ I don’t think I’ll be able to stop doing.

My research has made me terrified I am going to hell over this issue. Has anyone dealt with something like this in confession?

You should discuss this with your confessor. it may not be a mortal sin. Don't be afraid, please go do this. You will feel much better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are right on the facts as presented by the Roman church. Confession is valid when one has a contrite heart and "full purpose of amendment of life". Obviously you have a soft heart, but you do not intend to conform you life to RC teaching on this issue.

But be comforted. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. The Roman church may well be wrong on this issue. They say they are infallible on doctrine, but the rest of Christendom disagrees. You are trusting Christ to stand in your place at judgment not only for those sins that you have carefully documented during confession, but also for errors in judgment and weakness of the flesh and will.

Obviously you're not Catholic, if you're calling it "The Roman Church." Catholics don't call it that. Only people dissing it call it "the Roman Church."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I converted to Catholicism about ten years ago but have not been to confession in several years. I felt a pull to go back but upon doing the examination of conscience I’m having a bit of a crisis over whether I can continue being Catholic at all.

I obviously have things to confess (missing mass, sex prior to marriage, rudeness, selfishness, taking the Lord’s name in vain) but the issue I am stuck on is contraception. I’ve been doing research and it sunk in that this is a mortal sin, so essentially if I go and confess but continue keeping my IUD in I’m still sinning and confession is almost pointless. I am not in the position to have a child. I’m not sure where this feeling of guilt came from or what I should tell the priest, but this is the one mortal ‘sin’ I don’t think I’ll be able to stop doing.

My research has made me terrified I am going to hell over this issue. Has anyone dealt with something like this in confession?

You might want to consider a catholic-lite religion, like Episcopalian or Lutheran. The same smells and bell, but none of the crazy rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are right on the facts as presented by the Roman church. Confession is valid when one has a contrite heart and "full purpose of amendment of life". Obviously you have a soft heart, but you do not intend to conform you life to RC teaching on this issue.

But be comforted. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. The Roman church may well be wrong on this issue. They say they are infallible on doctrine, but the rest of Christendom disagrees. You are trusting Christ to stand in your place at judgment not only for those sins that you have carefully documented during confession, but also for errors in judgment and weakness of the flesh and will.

Obviously you're not Catholic, if you're calling it "The Roman Church." Catholics don't call it that. Only people dissing it call it "the Roman Church."

I'm obviously not Roman Catholic. But, like many Protestants, I don't think that the Roman Catholic church has a monopoly on the word "Catholic" or even on capitalizing it. I hold the standard Protestant view that all who are in Christ are in the holy Catholic church (to borrow the words of the Apostles Creed). I'm not dissing the Roman Catholic church, but I also don't grant to it the view that it is *the* Catholic church. It is *part* of the Catholic church.

[Anonymous]

Again, as said before, this is something much better discussed with a priest than on this forum. I wish you well and will be praying for you. I made my way back to the Church 17 years ago and know what it’s like to have to go to Confession after a long time. I also know the healing that comes through that Sacrament and through reception of the Eucharist. Wishing you God’s Peace and Blessings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are right on the facts as presented by the Roman church. Confession is valid when one has a contrite heart and "full purpose of amendment of life". Obviously you have a soft heart, but you do not intend to conform you life to RC teaching on this issue.

But be comforted. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. The Roman church may well be wrong on this issue. They say they are infallible on doctrine, but the rest of Christendom disagrees. You are trusting Christ to stand in your place at judgment not only for those sins that you have carefully documented during confession, but also for errors in judgment and weakness of the flesh and will.

Obviously you're not Catholic, if you're calling it "The Roman Church." Catholics don't call it that. Only people dissing it call it "the Roman Church."

I'm obviously not Roman Catholic. But, like many Protestants, I don't think that the Roman Catholic church has a monopoly on the word "Catholic" or even on capitalizing it. I hold the standard Protestant view that all who are in Christ are in the holy Catholic church (to borrow the words of the Apostles Creed). I'm not dissing the Roman Catholic church, but I also don't grant to it the view that it is *the* Catholic church. It is *part* of the Catholic church.

🙄

Who appointed you to declare what is a standard Protestant view?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please go talk to the priest. I am going to guess this is a common issue they deal with.

It is great that you are actually doing a real examination of conscience. I don't think the IUD use is any different than continued sex before marriage, which it sounds like you want to continue (thus the need for the IUD). So I think the premarital sex is the underlying issue in your case. Talk to your priest. talk to more than one priest. Read up on Catholic teaching on premarital sex and see if anything resonates with you.

I am married now. Thank you.

Look into natural family planning. It is very easy for some women.