Is this cheating? I’d assume it’s not common

[Anonymous]

DW (50) had lunch with a friend she sees a few time a month. Apparently there was some hot topic brought up, and the friend said she can’t wait to get home and "take care of business". Somehow this became a game of they both went home to do so as a race to see who could finish first. She showed me texts where they both started, who "won" etc.

I thought it was kind of hot, but did say it’s slightly cheating, she disagrees and says it’s more common than I’d think, and just harmless fun. It’s cheating right?

[Anonymous]

How in the hell is that cheating?

[Anonymous]

They’re just keeping notes on who can bang their husbands first after their boozy lunch

[Anonymous]

How do you consider that cheating?

[Anonymous]

OP carefully omitted the gender of DW’s lunch friend. How many of you would consider this phone sexting of a cheating variety of the friend is male? And why should it matter if the friend is female?

I run with girlfriends who can talk at length about sex but never would this happen. Something is off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP carefully omitted the gender of DW’s lunch friend. How many of you would consider this phone sexting of a cheating variety of the friend is male? And why should it matter if the friend is female?

I run with girlfriends who can talk at length about sex but never would this happen. Something is off.

Maybe you should try actually reading.

"the friend said she can’t wait to get home"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP carefully omitted the gender of DW’s lunch friend. How many of you would consider this phone sexting of a cheating variety of the friend is male? And why should it matter if the friend is female?

I run with girlfriends who can talk at length about sex but never would this happen. Something is off.

OP didn’t omit the gender of the lunch friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They’re just keeping notes on who can bang their husbands first after their boozy lunch

That’s not how I read it…

[Anonymous]

I assume this is the two women going to home to masturbate. And I do not think it's cheating, but maybe a little weird. Sort of like a circle jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP carefully omitted the gender of DW’s lunch friend. How many of you would consider this phone sexting of a cheating variety of the friend is male? And why should it matter if the friend is female?

I run with girlfriends who can talk at length about sex but never would this happen. Something is off.

OP didn’t omit the gender of the lunch friend.

OP did omit their own gender though. Maybe they are all lesbians? Or OP’s wife is bisexual?

[Anonymous]

Masturbation isn't cheating. Talking about how you masturbate(d) isn't inherently cheating, either. Is it being done to seduce? To titillate? In an exhibitionist way? That might be cheating.

But the golden rule for cheating is "If you can't tell your spouse, it's cheating". You only know because she told you. Not cheating.

You sound really high strung. Maybe go rub one out and calm down?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW (50) had lunch with a friend she sees a few time a month. Apparently there was some hot topic brought up, and the friend said she can’t wait to get home and "take care of business". Somehow this became a game of they both went home to do so as a race to see who could finish first. She showed me texts where they both started, who "won" etc.

I thought it was kind of hot, but did say it’s slightly cheating, she disagrees and says it’s more common than I’d think, and just harmless fun. It’s cheating right?

You're stupid af, OP. Way to guarantee she's not going to tell you about her goofy little game ever again. You thought it was hot, but then you had a meltdown because... why? Examine that. Your need to control, shame, or otherwise reject your spouse for this is a you issue, and you're going to have problems in your marriage (if you don't already) if you don't get a grip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I assume this is the two women going to home to masturbate. And I do not think it's cheating, but maybe a little weird. Sort of like a circle jerk.

Exactly, and gotta love DCUM. It’s 2 women, I’m the husband. I think it’s "slightly" cheating. I asked if she’d care if I did it with a female friend, and "that’s different"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DW (50) had lunch with a friend she sees a few time a month. Apparently there was some hot topic brought up, and the friend said she can’t wait to get home and "take care of business". Somehow this became a game of they both went home to do so as a race to see who could finish first. She showed me texts where they both started, who "won" etc.

I thought it was kind of hot, but did say it’s slightly cheating, she disagrees and says it’s more common than I’d think, and just harmless fun. It’s cheating right?

You're stupid af, OP. Way to guarantee she's not going to tell you about her goofy little game ever again. You thought it was hot, but then you had a meltdown because... why? Examine that. Your need to control, shame, or otherwise reject your spouse for this is a you issue, and you're going to have problems in your marriage (if you don't already) if you don't get a grip.

lol at meltdown. We are just having a debate if it’s a form of cheating. Neither of us care enough to do more than debate it. Her feeling is since it’s 2 women, no big deal, if it was a M/F it’s a big deal, I think sexes shouldn’t matter

[Anonymous]

I doubt most women would be okay with their husbands doing this with a female friend.