How hard is dating for late thirties childless women?

[Anonymous]

There seem to be a lot of them in the DC area. They are beautiful, fit, well educated and have great careers. The only thing missing, if they would like, are husbands.

I imagine these women are catches and can date whomever they'd like? But there is definitely a lack of eligible bachelors at that age as most of them are snagged by women by mid twenties.

As a similar thirtysomething considering divorce in a terrible marriage...I am curious. I am still beautiful and am mistaken for late twenties/early thirties a lot.

I don't have any wrinkles or have gained significant weight. I also don't have kids...just wondering how dire my situation is if I still want a great marriage and at least a kid

[Anonymous]

I'm 35 and recently reentered the dating scene after a 15 year relationship (7 dating, 8 married) and I have two little kids and a big dog. I had zero expectations and anticipated basically no one would be interested in a 35yo mom of 2 when they could have someone a few years younger without kids or a few years older with no kids or older kids.

I cannot even tell you how blown away I have been in the best way by the people I have met so far. I actually almost made a detailed post about it to give people in similar boats hope.

[Anonymous]

It depends on how rare you are as a total package relative to the men you want. A very attractive woman with reasonable expectations would theoretically have an easy time dating. But if she were an attractive woman with reasonable expectations, there's a close to 0% chance she'd be single in the first place. Men don't leave attractive and stable women on the shelf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how rare you are as a total package relative to the men you want. A very attractive woman with reasonable expectations would theoretically have an easy time dating. But if she were an attractive woman with reasonable expectations, there's a close to 0% chance she'd be single in the first place. Men don't leave attractive and stable women on the shelf.

Attractive and stable women can also end up single due to no fault of their own; death of a spouse; misbehavior on the part of their spouse - cheating, alcoholism etc

They are snapped up really quickly though!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how rare you are as a total package relative to the men you want. A very attractive woman with reasonable expectations would theoretically have an easy time dating. But if she were an attractive woman with reasonable expectations, there's a close to 0% chance she'd be single in the first place. Men don't leave attractive and stable women on the shelf.

Attractive and stable women can also end up single due to no fault of their own; death of a spouse; misbehavior on the part of their spouse - cheating, alcoholism etc

They are snapped up really quickly though!

Yep. My husband cheated and I left. Dating wasn't even on my radar, but as soon as I took my rings off and changed my name back on facebook, guys were immediately and constantly coming out of the woodwork reaching out to me.

[Anonymous]

Spouses are boring. Birth or adopt a child on your own -- you will never be bored.

--SMC, 49, adopted my daughter at 37 and never missed a beat on the dating scene wanted I to date.

[Anonymous]

I was 34 and a lawyer in DC when I got divorced, no kids, and I was amazed by the attention I got but from the wrong people including many married guys. I got fed up with DC and moved back to the mid-west to be closer to family and friends. My sister introduced me to a wonderful guy and at 38 I'm married with a baby. som it can happen!

[Anonymous]

You have to make it a part time job. Read this (title is terrible, contents is good): http://bookoutlines.pbworks.com/w/page/14422733/Why%20Men%20Marry%20Some%20Women%20And%20Not%20Others

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There seem to be a lot of them in the DC area. They are beautiful, fit, well educated and have great careers. The only thing missing, if they would like, are husbands.

I imagine these women are catches and can date whomever they'd like? But there is definitely a lack of eligible bachelors at that age as most of them are snagged by women by mid twenties.

As a similar thirtysomething considering divorce in a terrible marriage...I am curious. I am still beautiful and am mistaken for late twenties/early thirties a lot.

I don't have any wrinkles or have gained significant weight. I also don't have kids...just wondering how dire my situation is if I still want a great marriage and at least a kid

Men you would like to marry, would probably prefer someone more youthful and not having to worry about infertility battles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spouses are boring. Birth or adopt a child on your own -- you will never be bored.

--SMC, 49, adopted my daughter at 37 and never missed a beat on the dating scene wanted I to date.

Adopt, yes. Birth, no. Anything happens to you and they are up for adversity or being orphans. Obviously, both parents can become destitute or die too but odds are twice as good for one to survive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was 34 and a lawyer in DC when I got divorced, no kids, and I was amazed by the attention I got but from the wrong people including many married guys. I got fed up with DC and moved back to the mid-west to be closer to family and friends. My sister introduced me to a wonderful guy and at 38 I'm married with a baby. som it can happen!

What to do now do in Midwest? You SAH?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There seem to be a lot of them in the DC area. They are beautiful, fit, well educated and have great careers. The only thing missing, if they would like, are husbands.

I imagine these women are catches and can date whomever they'd like? But there is definitely a lack of eligible bachelors at that age as most of them are snagged by women by mid twenties.

As a similar thirtysomething considering divorce in a terrible marriage...I am curious. I am still beautiful and am mistaken for late twenties/early thirties a lot.

I don't have any wrinkles or have gained significant weight. I also don't have kids...just wondering how dire my situation is if I still want a great marriage and at least a kid

Why?

Yes there will be guys who are interested but probably more so if they're indifferent on having kids or already have them from a first marriage.

[Anonymous]

I’m watching a friend go through this and she gets a lot of dates with a lot of quality men.

But, she’s basically ONLY interested in a man who can support her without her having to work full time in a demanding job (she has hobby jobs-like in non-profits or being a part time teacher, etc.). That limits the possibilities greatly and is the reason she’s not in a relationship.

If you’re open to men of more average means, it expands the possibilities dramatically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spouses are boring. Birth or adopt a child on your own -- you will never be bored.

--SMC, 49, adopted my daughter at 37 and never missed a beat on the dating scene wanted I to date.

This is the way! Kids are awesome and you don’t need a spouse to have one.

I’m divorced with one kid and my dating life has been great. I can have a different date every weekend with a decent guy if I want. I have been in some good longer term relationships as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 34 and a lawyer in DC when I got divorced, no kids, and I was amazed by the attention I got but from the wrong people including many married guys. I got fed up with DC and moved back to the mid-west to be closer to family and friends. My sister introduced me to a wonderful guy and at 38 I'm married with a baby. som it can happen!

What to do now do in Midwest? You SAH?

No, still working full time.