ES Parents, please listen in to one or two zoom classes to make sure your kid isn’t “that kid”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP, are you a teacher or admin? Why are you sitting in on classes?

I'm a parent. I have more than one kid so I've done my share of parties and chaperoning etc over the years. Just saying what I've observed.

[Anonymous]

The school-home collaboration is the key to success. No one said anything about punishment, but rather support from home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP, are you a teacher or admin? Why are you sitting in on classes?

I'm a parent. I have more than one kid so I've done my share of parties and chaperoning etc over the years. Just saying what I've observed.

Got it — do your finite time at parties or field trips is a good gauge on what happens on a daily basis in the classroom. You really are out of your lane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes but in the past, children experienced consequences for poor behavior. Not anymore. How does that prepare them for reality?

Agree. Before the teachers had more control because the parents always backed the teacher. Now they demean them. They label their kids instead of parenting them. Make excuses. Want the government, county, school, and teachers to do more because they chose not to parent.

When my kids are in school, I expect them to be in capable hands. I don't expect them to blame me for behavior that is going on in their classrooms, when I'm not there.

In my experience, teachers don't bother teaching difficult kids. They just punish them. If they bothered explaining to them what the issues are, or work on having a good relationship with them, or -- yes, even give them some responsibility in the classroom so they feel wanted or needed -- then the kids have a chance to grow into the kind of kid teachers want in the classroom. It takes a special kind of talent to do things like that. I already posted, but we've come across a couple of teachers who have this ability and they're worth their weight in gold. They are the kind of teachers these kids remember and love for the rest of their lives.

They have 30 kids a day. If your kid is an a-hole in class every day, it is your fault, not theirs. Whether the teacher can work with the child or not. Whether they decrease time other kids have learning or not. Whether they get set to the principal or not. Your job as a parent is to get them prepared for school, manners, behavior, expectations, respect. Then and now with online learning. Stop making it out to be the teacher's fault. You are insane.

LOL nice touch. You lost all credibility with that last line. It's akin to what a teacher does with students who aren't perfect.

I'm not just talking about my own kids. I've been in classrooms plenty of times and seen teachers whittle away at kids with strong personalities -- and even with strong intellects. I've seen them try to shut down kids who ask too many questions or are too interested or engaged. It's easier for the teacher to have a roomful of kids who are docile than to have even one who is genuinely excited about something they're learning. Good teachers don't try to blunt their students emotions and intellect to mange the classroom. Admit it, not all teachers enjoy children.

DP

Give me a break. I have one kid with a ‘strong intellect’ who is interested and engaged. That doesn’t give him the right to be disruptive. He knows he can ask questions when the teacher allows for questions.

I’ve sat in on his CES classes and some kids are straight up disrespectful.

Being smart and inquisitive doesn’t mean you get to interrupt the teacher while he/she is trying to teach a lesson.

And I’m happy if a teacher cracks down on this. That doesn’t mean he/she doesn’t enjoy children. It just means that he/she is looking out for the rest of the kids as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Someone posted about a teacher shortage. There is no shortage. There are enough teachers out there to do the job but are choosing not to. Nobody cares much about the reasons they are choosing not to. My SIL quit teaching two years ago. She said she went to Human Capitol to sign some paperwork and asked if there would be an exit interview. They said that don’t do that. Okay, so who cares why she isn’t leaving? She is still certified and able to do the job but she couldn’t stand it anymore.

True enough.

We would have more teachers if teachers felt supported by parents and by administration.

Instead, MCPS likes to blame its problems on the teachers and admin provides little support. Who wants to work in an environment like that??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are a lot of parents who dismiss teacher’s comments about behavior simply because they cannot “see” the behavior. Meaning, they ignore it, whereas a teacher in a classroom of 25 students cannot ignore the behavior as it is preventing learning from happening.

While harnessing children’s behavior with jobs and tasks work with some children, it is not helpful for all. For example, it is effective for early finishers that disrupt others who are still working, but it for the student running around the classroom or refusing to work. That student will learn disruption=reward, and while it is a band aid for that time period, the cycle will continue as it becomes a learned behavior. When that student goes to another class and the teacher does not continue the cycle, that does not make the teacher a poor teacher nor not liking children as a PP stated. There is nothing magical about reinforcing negative behaviors, but there is something magical about a teacher-parent collaboration that encourages and supports growth.

That is not what happens. Actually what happens is a bond develops between the problem child, the teacher and the class, and that solves a lot of the behavioral problems right there. But some people prefer the satisfaction they get from punishing -- winning -- rather than changing the problem student for the better.

I've even seen teachers ignoring the PITA child -- always a boy -- who raises his hand over and over and over and never gets called on because he's the PITA kid. That's wrong. Again, I'm not talking about my own kids but what I've seen sitting in on classes.

No way. Not always the boy. What in the world?? Why would you say that.

The most irritating kid in my DS’ class last year was a girl who was a huge ‘know-it-all’ and couldn’t keep quiet when she was supposed to. All the kids knew. And it was incredibly disruptive. She would make rude comments when other kids spoke up. Or roll her eyes or make a point to read her own book if another kid was presenting, etc.

Teacher do what she could to get a hold of this, but my point is that it is not always a boy.

[Anonymous]

Did what she could

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I'm on my own conference calls. If my kid is behaving poorly on Zoom, the teacher should email me just like she does during the school year and I will talk to my kid.

If you are getting emails or calls from your teacher during the school year, your child is a total PIA. It takes a lot for teachers to have to start with parents. I would be embarrassed and very much in tune with my kid during those classes, even if it means rescheduling conferences to help him.

And maybe some are NT (mine is and thankfully he’s beyond elementary bc he was That Kid).
Not sure why you’d find that embarrassing as a parent.

[Anonymous]

A**hole kids have a**hole parents. They weren't parenting their child properly before, they're not going to start now. Email your teacher and ask him/her to mute problematic students or all students when she is speaking and have students utilize the "raise hand" button if they have a question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A**hole kids have a**hole parents. They weren't parenting their child properly before, they're not going to start now. Email your teacher and ask him/her to mute problematic students or all students when she is speaking and have students utilize the "raise hand" button if they have a question.

x10000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A**hole kids have a**hole parents. They weren't parenting their child properly before, they're not going to start now. Email your teacher and ask him/her to mute problematic students or all students when she is speaking and have students utilize the "raise hand" button if they have a question.

You don't have any idea.

You should feel lucky, not judgy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are a lot of parents who dismiss teacher’s comments about behavior simply because they cannot “see” the behavior. Meaning, they ignore it, whereas a teacher in a classroom of 25 students cannot ignore the behavior as it is preventing learning from happening.

While harnessing children’s behavior with jobs and tasks work with some children, it is not helpful for all. For example, it is effective for early finishers that disrupt others who are still working, but it for the student running around the classroom or refusing to work. That student will learn disruption=reward, and while it is a band aid for that time period, the cycle will continue as it becomes a learned behavior. When that student goes to another class and the teacher does not continue the cycle, that does not make the teacher a poor teacher nor not liking children as a PP stated. There is nothing magical about reinforcing negative behaviors, but there is something magical about a teacher-parent collaboration that encourages and supports growth.

That is not what happens. Actually what happens is a bond develops between the problem child, the teacher and the class, and that solves a lot of the behavioral problems right there. But some people prefer the satisfaction they get from punishing -- winning -- rather than changing the problem student for the better.

I've even seen teachers ignoring the PITA child -- always a boy -- who raises his hand over and over and over and never gets called on because he's the PITA kid. That's wrong. Again, I'm not talking about my own kids but what I've seen sitting in on classes.

But isn’t the whole point of parenting to prepare our kids to adapt to various environments? That they need to be respectful and listen regardless of whether they have a “special bond” with their teacher or not? My kids’ teachers have ranged from outstanding to very “meh” in terms of classroom management and my kids know — because I have actually taken my time to, y’know, parent them — how to behave regardless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A**hole kids have a**hole parents. They weren't parenting their child properly before, they're not going to start now. Email your teacher and ask him/her to mute problematic students or all students when she is speaking and have students utilize the "raise hand" button if they have a question.

x10000

Yep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s no coincidence that the disruptive attention-seeking kids have the parents who can’t be bothered to spend 5 minutes supervising them.

I totally agree with this. But what you're not getting is that it's not appropriate to punish a child for having crappy parents. Why not give them the extra attention they are (rightly) craving instead? Fill that gap and help them in life instead of being sanctimonious and punishing. Care about somebody other than you and yours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are a lot of parents who dismiss teacher’s comments about behavior simply because they cannot “see” the behavior. Meaning, they ignore it, whereas a teacher in a classroom of 25 students cannot ignore the behavior as it is preventing learning from happening.

While harnessing children’s behavior with jobs and tasks work with some children, it is not helpful for all. For example, it is effective for early finishers that disrupt others who are still working, but it for the student running around the classroom or refusing to work. That student will learn disruption=reward, and while it is a band aid for that time period, the cycle will continue as it becomes a learned behavior. When that student goes to another class and the teacher does not continue the cycle, that does not make the teacher a poor teacher nor not liking children as a PP stated. There is nothing magical about reinforcing negative behaviors, but there is something magical about a teacher-parent collaboration that encourages and supports growth.

That is not what happens. Actually what happens is a bond develops between the problem child, the teacher and the class, and that solves a lot of the behavioral problems right there. But some people prefer the satisfaction they get from punishing -- winning -- rather than changing the problem student for the better.

I've even seen teachers ignoring the PITA child -- always a boy -- who raises his hand over and over and over and never gets called on because he's the PITA kid. That's wrong. Again, I'm not talking about my own kids but what I've seen sitting in on classes.

But isn’t the whole point of parenting to prepare our kids to adapt to various environments? That they need to be respectful and listen regardless of whether they have a “special bond” with their teacher or not? My kids’ teachers have ranged from outstanding to very “meh” in terms of classroom management and my kids know — because I have actually taken my time to, y’know, parent them — how to behave regardless.

Yes, it is. But it's a decades-long process. And all adults are involved in the process, including teachers, in a positive or negative way.