I wish I had never become a parent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

You say you moved to be close to family. Are they helpful? Is that an added stress. I ask because family added stress to my situation. I'm full of family who don't or won't understand my dc's issues and are of the mindset that my kid is just coddled. It's a joy.

Yes, they are helpful in taking him off our hands when we need a break. But I don't feel like I have anyone I can really talk to about this, because I get the same attitude I get upthread - "your attitude sucks." Oh okay, thanks for the support. I'm having a bad day and your solution is to make me feel worse about myself. THAT is not helpful. So I don't talk about it to them, but I do reach out to ask for sitting help when I need a break.

It is hard to find support. It's hard for all of us to find support. It's also hard not to judge what is perceived as hostility to your child. Your words and terse writing style definitely cause a reaction. I have a child like yours and had to battle the school system and family. I have dropped most of my friends who don't have kids with disabilities because I felt if I heard one more ignorant comment, I would lose it. The advice, oh god, the stupid advice made me want to tear my hair out. I avoided so many people, my life has become a game of avoiding people. It kills me when people at my sweet kid like he has cooties. Like another poster, my dc's anxieties have improved drastically with maturity and a change of meds. Things really and truly have gotten better.

Our kids disabilities are so different that it makes it hard to be understanding. I've seen a lot of one upsmanship with disabilities among parents too. You know, the "my kids not doing a playdate with yours because Larlo only has dyslexia" kind of thing. BUT when you have perceived disapproval know that you there quite likely was someone feeling sympathy or wanting to help who remained quiet. How could I show you support if I saw you in one of these tense moments? The people who stand there quietly often aren't judging. You probably have people around who don't judge you but have no clue what to do or say.

Good luck op. I've criticized some of your comments but I truly hope things get better and you find support. You and your dc deserve it.

How could you help? Instead of being quiet you could pull me aside and let me know that you understand. Seriously. Because the room full of people quietly and awkwardly avoiding me and my son breaks my heart. Especially if you are an adult and you should know better than to ostracize a little kid. I know I sound like a bitch on this thread but I am angry and I hurt for my kid and I want to scream at people who don't understand, don't want to understand, and don't care.

I feel you on this so much. It kills me to the core. The parents who seem to enjoy ostracizing kids are the worst.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Yes, you're right. I was stupid to think that my four year old might grow out of this. I should have assumed that the way he was at 4 was how he always would be. I should have had my crystal ball. Stupid of me not to see the future.

Oh, stop the sarcasm. It was incredibly short-sighted of you to not think that your 4 year old may need continued assistance. Kids don't grow out of diagnosed anxiety and ADHD. There has to be some sort of therapy / meds / SOMETHING that you continue to plan for. What's the old adage, plan for the worst and hope for the best?

Again, OP, I want to support you but you're increased agitation and crazy lack of empathy for your child is hard to deal with -- even for a complete stranger. I can only imagine what your hero of a husband has to put up with on a daily basis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LAY OFF THE OP!

Holy hell! Let her vent...she obviously needs it. And to all the sunshine mary janes out there NOT EVERYONE IS LIKE THAT.

The posts on this thread like that are the ones agitating her. If you want a sparkly rainbow thread go find another one. But let the woman vent!!!!!!!

Sorry OP but I cannot believe some the ridiculous responses on here. Goodluck and feel better!

Thank you. It's true. People keep asking what they can do to help. What you can do is be here and let me get it out of my system. No one lets you talk. You are never allowed to be angry or sad or scared or frustrated. If you betray any weakness people pounce on it. I left all of my closest friends behind to do what I thought was best for my son. It is lonely. And I know it will get better. But today just feels like shit.

OP, I have been reading your posts today and it has left me in tears. I am sending you as many hugs and/or punching bags as you need, virtually. It must be overwhelming. I also agree that the reactions to your vents are downright bizarre. The fact that you said the above bolded, however, is reassuring. It will get better. And we're here for you on the days when it slips back. Hugs.

XO

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Yes, you're right. I was stupid to think that my four year old might grow out of this. I should have assumed that the way he was at 4 was how he always would be. I should have had my crystal ball. Stupid of me not to see the future.

Oh, stop the sarcasm. It was incredibly short-sighted of you to not think that your 4 year old may need continued assistance. Kids don't grow out of diagnosed anxiety and ADHD. There has to be some sort of therapy / meds / SOMETHING that you continue to plan for. What's the old adage, plan for the worst and hope for the best?

Again, OP, I want to support you but you're increased agitation and crazy lack of empathy for your child is hard to deal with -- even for a complete stranger. I can only imagine what your hero of a husband has to put up with on a daily basis.

He wasn't diagnosed at 4, and no one supports a diagnosis at 4. He was JUST diagnosed about two months ago, at age six. He actually did get better, much better, after we moved, for an entire year. He thrived at his preschool and made friends in our neighborhood. But then he started K and the shit hit the fan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Agreed. One of them is going to have to sacrifice their career for the sake of their child, which should be an easy thing to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Yes, you're right. I was stupid to think that my four year old might grow out of this. I should have assumed that the way he was at 4 was how he always would be. I should have had my crystal ball. Stupid of me not to see the future.

Oh, stop the sarcasm. It was incredibly short-sighted of you to not think that your 4 year old may need continued assistance. Kids don't grow out of diagnosed anxiety and ADHD. There has to be some sort of therapy / meds / SOMETHING that you continue to plan for. What's the old adage, plan for the worst and hope for the best?

Again, OP, I want to support you but you're increased agitation and crazy lack of empathy for your child is hard to deal with -- even for a complete stranger. I can only imagine what your hero of a husband has to put up with on a daily basis.

He wasn't diagnosed at 4, and no one supports a diagnosis at 4. He was JUST diagnosed about two months ago, at age six. He actually did get better, much better, after we moved, for an entire year. He thrived at his preschool and made friends in our neighborhood. But then he started K and the shit hit the fan.

OK. That's new information. What are his options for school? Is the problem the kids or his teacher? Does he have his IEP / 504 in place? What was it about the preschool that allowed him to thrive vs. K? You mention he has friends in the neighborhood. Is there any chance that one of them can attend the same camp from time to time?

I know this is never going to go away and that you'll continue to have good days and bad days; however, you need to remain focused (and I know you are -- I know your posts are just vents and not serious threats) on your little guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Yes, you're right. I was stupid to think that my four year old might grow out of this. I should have assumed that the way he was at 4 was how he always would be. I should have had my crystal ball. Stupid of me not to see the future.

Oh, stop the sarcasm. It was incredibly short-sighted of you to not think that your 4 year old may need continued assistance. Kids don't grow out of diagnosed anxiety and ADHD. There has to be some sort of therapy / meds / SOMETHING that you continue to plan for. What's the old adage, plan for the worst and hope for the best?

Again, OP, I want to support you but you're increased agitation and crazy lack of empathy for your child is hard to deal with -- even for a complete stranger. I can only imagine what your hero of a husband has to put up with on a daily basis.

He wasn't diagnosed at 4, and no one supports a diagnosis at 4. He was JUST diagnosed about two months ago, at age six. He actually did get better, much better, after we moved, for an entire year. He thrived at his preschool and made friends in our neighborhood. But then he started K and the shit hit the fan.

OK. That's new information. What are his options for school? Is the problem the kids or his teacher? Does he have his IEP / 504 in place? What was it about the preschool that allowed him to thrive vs. K? You mention he has friends in the neighborhood. Is there any chance that one of them can attend the same camp from time to time?

I know this is never going to go away and that you'll continue to have good days and bad days; however, you need to remain focused (and I know you are -- I know your posts are just vents and not serious threats) on your little guy.

He goes to a private and they have been wonderful. We will have their version of a 504. The difference between preschool and K? Expectations. For behavior, academic performance, etc. If you can't pay attention and can't sit still you can't learn, and you are disruptive. Preschool was more fluid - no intensive academic content, no assessments, etc. He learned a lot, but the expectations where way different.

He has let his friendships with the neighbor kids slide. He won't go to someone's house without us. He won't join in games. Just getting him to go outside is like drawing blood from a stone. Plus he knows kids at camp and it doesn't seem to matter. The counselors and lots of other kids are all new to him, and he gets clingy and shy and doesn't want us to leave. He refuses to participate. If he stays home he just wants to watch TV all day. Again, I've stayed home with him a couple of days. Trying to talk him into a game, or a walk, or a bike ride, or to go to the pool, or anything other than TV is brutal. I'm not going to let him spend his whole childhood alone and indoors.

[Anonymous]

That things changed so much with K makes me wonder about the school or a teacher there. My dc's anxiety went through the roof and we discovered his home room teacher, an asshole football coach, was picking on him. It was night and day once we left that hell hole of a school.

[Anonymous]

OP sounds vaguely familiar. She moved to be closer to family and out the DC area bc she thought his issues could be resolved by a less hectic life style and a more understanding school system.

Since your DS got the diagnosis, does he have an IEP? Since you moved to a less cost of living area, why can't one parent stay home?

[Anonymous]

Well, based on all of this new information, it does sound like the poor little guy will have to get his meds adjusted. I'm glad to hear that his school is a caring, understanding environment. And I agree that he shouldn't be allowed to sit around all day and not engage in some sort of activity.

This is hard parenting OP. You're not alone. We are all out there struggling to do our best by our kids on a daily basis. We've all made our choices and we are here because we had the best of intentions to live our lives surrounded by people we love. That doesn't make it easy, though.

Keep on keeping on, OP. You and your DH might have to pull out a nuclear option to keep you all emotionally afloat. But, for now, follow through on your appointments and hope for the best.

I'm pulling for you all!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
He has let his friendships with the neighbor kids slide. He won't go to someone's house without us. He won't join in games. Just getting him to go outside is like drawing blood from a stone. Plus he knows kids at camp and it doesn't seem to matter. The counselors and lots of other kids are all new to him, and he gets clingy and shy and doesn't want us to leave. He refuses to participate. If he stays home he just wants to watch TV all day. Again, I've stayed home with him a couple of days. Trying to talk him into a game, or a walk, or a bike ride, or to go to the pool, or anything other than TV is brutal. I'm not going to let him spend his whole childhood alone and indoors.

You could try (maybe you have already) not engaging him. Give him a screen limit and if he tantrums, ignore it. Go on about your day. Tell him its game time. He doesn't want to and starts in, then you and DH start playing and don't engage him. Stop giving him attention for negative behavior (its extremely difficult to do I know). Time for a walk and he doesn't want to go? You and DH go, out to the sidewalk and see what he does. He'll push back but you stand firm. Yes, I know he has anxiety and ADHD that just means he needs the same as all children, structure and discipline, it just might take him longer to adapt to it.

And don't forget tons of over the top attention and praise when he does partake in the game, walk, screen limits etc. He is the child, you are the parent. He'll figure that out if you stand firm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Yes, you're right. I was stupid to think that my four year old might grow out of this. I should have assumed that the way he was at 4 was how he always would be. I should have had my crystal ball. Stupid of me not to see the future.

Oh, stop the sarcasm. It was incredibly short-sighted of you to not think that your 4 year old may need continued assistance. Kids don't grow out of diagnosed anxiety and ADHD. There has to be some sort of therapy / meds / SOMETHING that you continue to plan for. What's the old adage, plan for the worst and hope for the best?

Again, OP, I want to support you but you're increased agitation and crazy lack of empathy for your child is hard to deal with -- even for a complete stranger. I can only imagine what your hero of a husband has to put up with on a daily basis.

He wasn't diagnosed at 4, and no one supports a diagnosis at 4. He was JUST diagnosed about two months ago, at age six. He actually did get better, much better, after we moved, for an entire year. He thrived at his preschool and made friends in our neighborhood. But then he started K and the shit hit the fan.

OK. That's new information. What are his options for school? Is the problem the kids or his teacher? Does he have his IEP / 504 in place? What was it about the preschool that allowed him to thrive vs. K? You mention he has friends in the neighborhood. Is there any chance that one of them can attend the same camp from time to time?

I know this is never going to go away and that you'll continue to have good days and bad days; however, you need to remain focused (and I know you are -- I know your posts are just vents and not serious threats) on your little guy.

He goes to a private and they have been wonderful. We will have their version of a 504. The difference between preschool and K? Expectations. For behavior, academic performance, etc. If you can't pay attention and can't sit still you can't learn, and you are disruptive. Preschool was more fluid - no intensive academic content, no assessments, etc. He learned a lot, but the expectations where way different.

He has let his friendships with the neighbor kids slide. He won't go to someone's house without us. He won't join in games. Just getting him to go outside is like drawing blood from a stone. Plus he knows kids at camp and it doesn't seem to matter. The counselors and lots of other kids are all new to him, and he gets clingy and shy and doesn't want us to leave. He refuses to participate. If he stays home he just wants to watch TV all day. Again, I've stayed home with him a couple of days. Trying to talk him into a game, or a walk, or a bike ride, or to go to the pool, or anything other than TV is brutal. I'm not going to let him spend his whole childhood alone and indoors.

My child's iep allows movement breaks, anxiety breaks, you name it. He has a designated safe place and safe teachers to go to if he feels overwhelmed. I know some of his friends have the same accommodation. It helped a great deal because along with the break, the child regains some control over an environment that seems out of control. At our public ES my dc was never expected to sit still for any length of time and 6 is still young. The accommodations were implemented to such an extent that he never disrupted class. If he has behavior problems and is getting in trouble, he needs a version of a behavior plan which will protect your child from a punitive teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds vaguely familiar. She moved to be closer to family and out the DC area bc she thought his issues could be resolved by a less hectic life style and a more understanding school system.

Since your DS got the diagnosis, does he have an IEP? Since you moved to a less cost of living area, why can't one parent stay home?

Because neither of us makes enough independently to adequately support a household on our own. And even a temporary step out for either of us probably means never getting a decent job again. I do not think the answer is for my husband to quit his (flexible, PT, WAH) job since my child is now school aged and he'll still have to go to school 9 months out of the year. We are both there in the evenings and on weekends.

I just mentioned above that he will receive a 504. The school has, in fact, been immensely more understanding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you didn't "just move." You moved to be closer to family 2 years ago. If you need to switch houses to provide a better home environment for your son, then your DH and you really need to consider that option. Your kid doesn't care how big his house is, just that he is comfortable and loved. He is not comfortable and certainly can't feel loved when you are pulling him into a camp (that apparently terrifies him, hence his behavior) and oozing frustration and anger all over the place.

I can't imagine how it would feel to be a child, naturally anxious and suffering from ADHD, and know that my mother is constantly frustrated by me, angered by my actions, and has no problem telling strangers that she's thought about kicking the shit out of me.

Fine, you're getting help. Fine, you're on lexapro. Fine, you apparently can't afford extensive help(which, btw, you were stupid not to budget for...why would this situation get any better without continued help and therapy?). But you CAN get dad on board to stay home with this poor boy and give him a soft place to land at night.

I was so on your side until just recently. I just can't stand to think that your anger and frustration is this bad within your home on a daily basis. I ache for your son and DH too.

Yes, you're right. I was stupid to think that my four year old might grow out of this. I should have assumed that the way he was at 4 was how he always would be. I should have had my crystal ball. Stupid of me not to see the future.

Oh, stop the sarcasm. It was incredibly short-sighted of you to not think that your 4 year old may need continued assistance. Kids don't grow out of diagnosed anxiety and ADHD. There has to be some sort of therapy / meds / SOMETHING that you continue to plan for. What's the old adage, plan for the worst and hope for the best?

Again, OP, I want to support you but you're increased agitation and crazy lack of empathy for your child is hard to deal with -- even for a complete stranger. I can only imagine what your hero of a husband has to put up with on a daily basis.

He wasn't diagnosed at 4, and no one supports a diagnosis at 4. He was JUST diagnosed about two months ago, at age six. He actually did get better, much better, after we moved, for an entire year. He thrived at his preschool and made friends in our neighborhood. But then he started K and the shit hit the fan.

OK. That's new information. What are his options for school? Is the problem the kids or his teacher? Does he have his IEP / 504 in place? What was it about the preschool that allowed him to thrive vs. K? You mention he has friends in the neighborhood. Is there any chance that one of them can attend the same camp from time to time?

I know this is never going to go away and that you'll continue to have good days and bad days; however, you need to remain focused (and I know you are -- I know your posts are just vents and not serious threats) on your little guy.

He goes to a private and they have been wonderful. We will have their version of a 504. The difference between preschool and K? Expectations. For behavior, academic performance, etc. If you can't pay attention and can't sit still you can't learn, and you are disruptive. Preschool was more fluid - no intensive academic content, no assessments, etc. He learned a lot, but the expectations where way different.

He has let his friendships with the neighbor kids slide. He won't go to someone's house without us. He won't join in games. Just getting him to go outside is like drawing blood from a stone. Plus he knows kids at camp and it doesn't seem to matter. The counselors and lots of other kids are all new to him, and he gets clingy and shy and doesn't want us to leave. He refuses to participate. If he stays home he just wants to watch TV all day. Again, I've stayed home with him a couple of days. Trying to talk him into a game, or a walk, or a bike ride, or to go to the pool, or anything other than TV is brutal. I'm not going to let him spend his whole childhood alone and indoors.

My child's iep allows movement breaks, anxiety breaks, you name it. He has a designated safe place and safe teachers to go to if he feels overwhelmed. I know some of his friends have the same accommodation. It helped a great deal because along with the break, the child regains some control over an environment that seems out of control. At our public ES my dc was never expected to sit still for any length of time and 6 is still young. The accommodations were implemented to such an extent that he never disrupted class. If he has behavior problems and is getting in trouble, he needs a version of a behavior plan which will protect your child from a punitive teacher.

I assume he will have these things when next school year starts. But it is not helping me for summer camp now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, based on all of this new information, it does sound like the poor little guy will have to get his meds adjusted. I'm glad to hear that his school is a caring, understanding environment. And I agree that he shouldn't be allowed to sit around all day and not engage in some sort of activity.

This is hard parenting OP. You're not alone. We are all out there struggling to do our best by our kids on a daily basis. We've all made our choices and we are here because we had the best of intentions to live our lives surrounded by people we love. That doesn't make it easy, though.

Keep on keeping on, OP. You and your DH might have to pull out a nuclear option to keep you all emotionally afloat. But, for now, follow through on your appointments and hope for the best.

I'm pulling for you all!

If he was only diagnosed 2 months ago, he is still at the "need to find medication stage" not the adjustment stage. Op needs to take him to a child psychiatrist and find herself a doctor too. Since she moved two yrs ago, there is just no excuse other than burying her had in the sand about her own mental health issues.

Sounds like she also needs to find a school that is a better "fit" for her DS and get him some supports bc sunshine and playing outdoors simply is not going to cut it.