Things you wish your wish your spouse told you before the wedding:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll play.

I'll become indifferent to sex.

I'll have horrible dental habits even though you'll ask nicely time after time for me to floss. Eventually you'll stop kissing me and I won't care.

I won't help with the kids. In fact, I'll put them in dangerous situations and you'll always have to supervise them.

I won't be able to help in managing our finances because it's "just too hard."

I'll lie to you about serious things.

When caught, I'll weep like a little girl and tremble so you feel bad and don't get upset with me.

I'm a DW btw.

I know these are infuriating, enraging even, but I am laughing so hard at your wording, that I think I may have strained my neck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll play.

I'll become indifferent to sex.

I'll have horrible dental habits even though you'll ask nicely time after time for me to floss. Eventually you'll stop kissing me and I won't care.

I won't help with the kids. In fact, I'll put them in dangerous situations and you'll always have to supervise them.

I won't be able to help in managing our finances because it's "just too hard."

I'll lie to you about serious things.

When caught, I'll weep like a little girl and tremble so you feel bad and don't get upset with me.

I'm a DW btw.

I know these are infuriating, enraging even, but I am laughing so hard at your wording, that I think I may have strained my neck.

I'm the poster! Glad that nonsense is at least good for something!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That even though I just quit my $10k/yr job at the hotel and will not make any $ for the first 2 years of our marriage I will eventually make millions. I will be a better father than you could ever imagine. That I will insist that you quit your job and that your parents move in with us when they get sick (cancer and Alzheimers).

Wha- what's your damage, PP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That even though I just quit my $10k/yr job at the hotel and will not make any $ for the first 2 years of our marriage I will eventually make millions. I will be a better father than you could ever imagine. That I will insist that you quit your job and that your parents move in with us when they get sick (cancer and Alzheimers).

Wha- what's your damage, PP?

Awesome

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. I can watch The Shawshank Redemption an infinite number of times and if it's on any cable channel I will expect to watch it, even if I just watched it earlier in the day.

Gee! I was not aware I was married. I could have written this!

My husband is like this with Forrest Gump

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im gonna get really fat when pregnant and it will be hard on me emotionally. I will lose the weight within the year but each time it will be really hard for me. I know you don't care but I felt disgusting each time for a solid year. Please try and realize its super super hard for me.

Wow, what an asshole. I am so glad you are not my husband. Your wife gave birth to your children AND lost all pregnancy weight!!! she had the right to complain and feel miserable because guess what? It IS really, really tough!

I read this as she struggles with the weight gain and the husband doesn't care and doesn't understand why it's hard for her.

[Anonymous]

Even though I want to be faithful I will cheat throughout our entire marriage; not one night stands but with friends; coworkers; ex-s.

[Anonymous]

"I may be sweet and agreeable, but once I gain leverage -I will become someone akin to a teenager suddenly given the powers, but not the wits and responsibility of an adult".

[Anonymous]

When I'm angry or annoyed with you, I'll withhold sex and give you the silent treatment. I won't tell you why I'm angry or annoyed because I'll expect you to be a mind reader.

I was a go getter when we got married, but I'll become selfish and lazy after the baby comes. Suddenly, I'll believe in "man's work" and "woman's work".

We'll have a loveless marriage for 15 years until I drop dead from a heart attack because I'll refuse to follow doctor's orders.

Will you be mine?


P.S. My mother will always come first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I'm angry or annoyed with you, I'll withhold sex and give you the silent treatment. I won't tell you why I'm angry or annoyed because I'll expect you to be a mind reader.

I was a go getter when we got married, but I'll become selfish and lazy after the baby comes. Suddenly, I'll believe in "man's work" and "woman's work".

We'll have a loveless marriage for 15 years until I drop dead from a heart attack because I'll refuse to follow doctor's orders.

Will you be mine?


P.S. My mother will always come first.

Wow, she had a heart attack? There IS justice in this world.


]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I'm angry or annoyed with you, I'll withhold sex and give you the silent treatment. I won't tell you why I'm angry or annoyed because I'll expect you to be a mind reader.

I was a go getter when we got married, but I'll become selfish and lazy after the baby comes. Suddenly, I'll believe in "man's work" and "woman's work".

We'll have a loveless marriage for 15 years until I drop dead from a heart attack because I'll refuse to follow doctor's orders.

Will you be mine?


P.S. My mother will always come first.

Hugs. Sounds like you need one. Not to be a mommy, but please take care of yourself and visit the doctor. Busy parents always come last.

[Anonymous]

The sex ends now.

[Anonymous]

That you will support me financially, you will do all parenting of the children, all the housework unless you work harder to pay for that help and I will spend my days on my iPad, going to church and going to hookers.

[Anonymous]

I wish my DW had told me that she really did not have a work ethic, that she is lazy, and hates house work.

I wish I knew she would spend her days on her phone instead of doing anything else....

Oh, and I wish I knew that sex was only for landing a hubby and making a kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That even though I just quit my $10k/yr job at the hotel and will not make any $ for the first 2 years of our marriage I will eventually make millions. I will be a better father than you could ever imagine. That I will insist that you quit your job and that your parents move in with us when they get sick (cancer and Alzheimers).

Wha- what's your damage, PP?

PP, I would have married him faster