Awkward – neighbors overheard me talk about their DC

[Anonymous]

Op Said that the neighbor knew her baby was a preemie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op Said that the neighbor knew her baby was a preemie.

I don't know how since they had just met.

[Anonymous]

9 pages??? Get lives! People judge! Be okay with that!

People really care what others think of you/ your children?? That's lunacy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I said a preemie baby -- one who you know is/was a preemie, as op's neighbor did -- should not be called tiny. No matter how innocently you mean it, you have to pause for or second and imagine the reception. Most of us censor ourselves somewhat in almost every conversation we have to avoid being g unnecessarily rude or hurtful. It's part of living in society.

this thread really brought out the PC police. i am as liberal as they come, but this is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said a preemie baby -- one who you know is/was a preemie, as op's neighbor did -- should not be called tiny. No matter how innocently you mean it, you have to pause for or second and imagine the reception. Most of us censor ourselves somewhat in almost every conversation we have to avoid being g unnecessarily rude or hurtful. It's part of living in society.

this thread really brought out the PC police. i am as liberal as they come, but this is ridiculous.

Op. your baby is so tiny. Adorable .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said a preemie baby -- one who you know is/was a preemie, as op's neighbor did -- should not be called tiny. No matter how innocently you mean it, you have to pause for or second and imagine the reception. Most of us censor ourselves somewhat in almost every conversation we have to avoid being g unnecessarily rude or hurtful. It's part of living in society.

this thread really brought out the PC police. i am as liberal as they come, but this is ridiculous.

If you think this is ridiculous -- to remember you're talking to the mom of a preemie, and choose your words carefully as a result -- then you are self-centered and heartless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said a preemie baby -- one who you know is/was a preemie, as op's neighbor did -- should not be called tiny. No matter how innocently you mean it, you have to pause for or second and imagine the reception. Most of us censor ourselves somewhat in almost every conversation we have to avoid being g unnecessarily rude or hurtful. It's part of living in society.

this thread really brought out the PC police. i am as liberal as they come, but this is ridiculous.

If you think this is ridiculous -- to remember you're talking to the mom of a preemie, and choose your words carefully as a result -- then you are self-centered and heartless.

+1

[Anonymous]

My kid is big for his age. If I had overheard what you said I wouldn't have been offended. Most likely she didn't even hear it, it only takes a second to drop off a sock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said a preemie baby -- one who you know is/was a preemie, as op's neighbor did -- should not be called tiny. No matter how innocently you mean it, you have to pause for or second and imagine the reception. Most of us censor ourselves somewhat in almost every conversation we have to avoid being g unnecessarily rude or hurtful. It's part of living in society.

this thread really brought out the PC police. i am as liberal as they come, but this is ridiculous.

If you think this is ridiculous -- to remember you're talking to the mom of a preemie, and choose your words carefully as a result -- then you are self-centered and heartless.

+1

-1. Totally disagree.

I understand you may be sensitive (as many people are to things that hit close to home). But if you go looking for things to be offended about, you will always find it.

[Anonymous]

I'd let it go. Any over the top gushing over how tiny/huge your kid is would make anyone feel a little miffed. DC#1 was always tiny, and is especially so now that he is 5 and his younger sister (18 months old) is and has always been chunkier. So I've had both experiences.

[Anonymous]

I mean, are you willfully oblivious people even reading? We're not talking about being OFFENDED. I at least clearly said several times that I can't imagine many people would say that trying to hurt your feelings. And most people get that. Nonetheless, if you're having a nice Sunday and for once you happen NOT to be worrying about the baby's size or what he has or hasn't kept down that day, or maybe for once you're not nervous that he'll have to be hospitalized after the scheudled doctor's visit because he hasn't gained...again.... Do you think it is pleasant to get a reminder? That's what I'm saying. I don't think anyone is coming unhinged by the comments. But yeah, some people call all babies tiny. But when your baby is truly teeny tiny, MANY MANY people say it. I'd get it several times a day, every day. Never got it more than once every few months with my chunky first. So please, get outside of yourself. Or don't. You seem to feel that if you don't mean any harm, nobody has a right to be harmed?

And the person saying get psychotherapy, etc, you're just a bitch. I doubt you care if you hurt anyone's feelings. Baiting and insulting a stressed-out group of premie moms and taking shots at them is definitely one of your finer moments. Please, make sure you teach your children to take shots at people who are struggling. Cuz it's just so fun! Right?

[Anonymous]

no. offensive is using something horrific like the "r" word to describe a child, or just the use of the "r" word in general conversation. you seem to be projecting your insecurities on places they have no business being. please use this energy for other things vs. getting upset over the use of an adjective in an innocent manner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:no. offensive is using something horrific like the "r" word to describe a child, or just the use of the "r" word in general conversation. you seem to be projecting your insecurities on places they have no business being. please use this energy for other things vs. getting upset over the use of an adjective in an innocent manner.

dude, really? Did you not read where I said it's not offensive, it's the fact that the word triggers stress and brings them down? Nobody is spoiling for a fight. We're just telling you that when you call our babies, who are tiny because there is something wrong, "tiny," it reminds us that there is something wrong. Sometimes, shocking as it might seem, we just don't want to have our kids' problems observed and pointed out to us. And YES, we get that you didn't know it was a problem. Now you do. If you KNOW a kid has a premie child, please just don't go there with "tiny." Seriously.

[Anonymous]

God, you people who are bleeding on about your right to call known preemies tiny and how wussy preemie moms need o toughen up and really being willfully obtuse and nasty and stubbornly refusing to recognize that your stance might be a little shitty. It's apparently way too much to ask for you to learn anything about their struggles, so keep on keeping on calling their babies wee in the face of it, knowing that you're just keeping it real. Seriously, you suck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean, are you willfully oblivious people even reading? We're not talking about being OFFENDED. I at least clearly said several times that I can't imagine many people would say that trying to hurt your feelings. And most people get that. Nonetheless, if you're having a nice Sunday and for once you happen NOT to be worrying about the baby's size or what he has or hasn't kept down that day, or maybe for once you're not nervous that he'll have to be hospitalized after the scheudled doctor's visit because he hasn't gained...again.... Do you think it is pleasant to get a reminder? That's what I'm saying. I don't think anyone is coming unhinged by the comments. But yeah, some people call all babies tiny. But when your baby is truly teeny tiny, MANY MANY people say it. I'd get it several times a day, every day. Never got it more than once every few months with my chunky first. So please, get outside of yourself. Or don't. You seem to feel that if you don't mean any harm, nobody has a right to be harmed?

And the person saying get psychotherapy, etc, you're just a bitch. I doubt you care if you hurt anyone's feelings. Baiting and insulting a stressed-out group of premie moms and taking shots at them is definitely one of your finer moments. Please, make sure you teach your children to take shots at people who are struggling. Cuz it's just so fun! Right?

OK, mom of a preemie and FTT with developmental disabilities kid here. If innocent gushing about your baby throws you into a tizzy, maybe you do need counseling. That is nuts. Yeah, some people don't get it but harmed. Really?