A Jew named Mary?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jewish people are literally members of tribes so of course they are tribalistic.

Being tribalistic (in the sense that I’m referring to) in 2026 is not a positive thing. (This applies to all groups.) We’re all human beings.

I can bet that if you (or anyone else - including myself) needed an organ donation or blood transfusion, you would accept the first match without hesitation. You wouldn’t ask which ethnic or racial group the donor belongs to.

[Anonymous]

Do it. It’s a pretty name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jews are God’s chosen people while everyone else isn’t. If you had the chance to be chosen, or be relegated to the discarded, aren’t you going to try to get into the chosen group?

Chosen is a neutral word.

I’ll leave you to figure out what that means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do it. It’s a pretty name.

This. I hate when people say that Mary is overused or plain. It was overused 50+ years ago. It’s not overused in the 2020s. Catch up, people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jews are God’s chosen people while everyone else isn’t. If you had the chance to be chosen, or be relegated to the discarded, aren’t you going to try to get into the chosen group?

Documents written by a certain group of people are obviously going to claim that group of people are inherently superior or special. That’s just bias, I fear.

If you read a document written by a WS, you’d see the same pattern.

[Anonymous]

What about Maayan or Meira? I think both go much better with your other daughters’ names.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jewish people are literally members of tribes so of course they are tribalistic.

Being tribalistic (in the sense that I’m referring to) in 2026 is not a positive thing. (This applies to all groups.) We’re all human beings.

I can bet that if you (or anyone else - including myself) needed an organ donation or blood transfusion, you would accept the first match without hesitation. You wouldn’t ask which ethnic or racial group the donor belongs to.

What? Of course I would. The odds of an organ matching you better if it’s from your same group of people is obviously higher?? What nonsense is this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jews are God’s chosen people while everyone else isn’t. If you had the chance to be chosen, or be relegated to the discarded, aren’t you going to try to get into the chosen group?

Documents written by a certain group of people are obviously going to claim that group of people are inherently superior or special. That’s just bias, I fear.

If you read a document written by a WS, you’d see the same pattern.

Except these are “documents written by a certain group of people.” These are God’s own words.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jewish people are literally members of tribes so of course they are tribalistic.

Being tribalistic (in the sense that I’m referring to) in 2026 is not a positive thing. (This applies to all groups.) We’re all human beings.

I can bet that if you (or anyone else - including myself) needed an organ donation or blood transfusion, you would accept the first match without hesitation. You wouldn’t ask which ethnic or racial group the donor belongs to.

What? Of course I would. The odds of an organ matching you better if it’s from your same group of people is obviously higher?? What nonsense is this?

I think PP was talking about once a match has already been found. They’re saying you wouldn’t turn it down just because it came from someone of a different group. Also, it’s possible to receive a donation or transfusion from someone that is from a different group of people (especially when it comes to blood transfusions). It’s just less likely when it comes to bone marrow. Less likely doesn’t mean impossible, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jews are God’s chosen people while everyone else isn’t. If you had the chance to be chosen, or be relegated to the discarded, aren’t you going to try to get into the chosen group?

Documents written by a certain group of people are obviously going to claim that group of people are inherently superior or special. That’s just bias, I fear.

If you read a document written by a WS, you’d see the same pattern.

Except these are “documents written by a certain group of people.” These are God’s own words.

I believe they were written by mere human beings. I view them the same as I view the Book of Mormon and the Quran. They just have the luxury of being older than both the BOM and Quran. My mind cannot be changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jewish people are literally members of tribes so of course they are tribalistic.

Being tribalistic (in the sense that I’m referring to) in 2026 is not a positive thing. (This applies to all groups.) We’re all human beings.

I can bet that if you (or anyone else - including myself) needed an organ donation or blood transfusion, you would accept the first match without hesitation. You wouldn’t ask which ethnic or racial group the donor belongs to.

What? Of course I would. The odds of an organ matching you better if it’s from your same group of people is obviously higher?? What nonsense is this?

Let’s think about this rationally. Jewish people (assuming you’re Jewish) are about 2.5% of the US population (assuming you live in the US). An even smaller percentage are eligible and/or willing to be blood or organ donors. The likelihood that you would receive blood or an organ from another Jewish person in the event of needing either is extremely low. This is especially true in the case of blood transfusions.

Can you honestly say that you would turn down a match solely because the donor didn’t belong to your ethnic group? There are also higher odds of one’s own family members being a better match, but I doubt any sane person would turn down a match from a stranger if that was their only option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, she'll forever have an icebreaker when meeting new people.

That’s not necessarily a bad thing. My name has been a conversation starter my entire life. I love it!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Jew with a very non-Jewish name - don’t do it. My whole life, everyone has assumed I’m not Jewish or a convert. Which isn’t the end of the world but it gets tedious. When I got married the rabbi grilled me about whether I was sure I wasn’t a convert, because of my name.

If you must call her Mary, then name her Miriam and use Mary as a nickname.

Also your other kids have very religious sounding Jewish names and if you add Mary, people will think she’s adopted and not converted. With Miriam, even nicknamed Mary, they won’t think that.

THIS. I've had to jump through hoops to prove that I'm Jewish because of my non-Jewish name (especially when getting married). I swear they practically did a full-blown background check on me. They wanted the names of my parents, my grandparents, etc. They wanted to know which cemeteries my older ancestors are buried in. They wanted to know where my family emigrated from. Thankfully, my parents were able to give me their ketubah that I was able to eventually provide as proof to easily put the doubt to rest.

If your daughter is even slightly interested in her Jewish identity and wants to be actively involved in her Jewish community, being named Mary will be a nightmare for her logistically speaking.

Why does anyone even choose to be part of a community that is so exclusive and unwelcoming? That is a choice.

This proves to me that humans are still very tribalistic.

Jews are God’s chosen people while everyone else isn’t. If you had the chance to be chosen, or be relegated to the discarded, aren’t you going to try to get into the chosen group?

If someone truly wanted to be Jewish AKA “chosen”, don’t you think they already would have started the process of converting...?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The most famous Mary in history was Jewish.

But of course her actual name was Miriam. Mary is the Christian version.

Mary is the English language version. It’s Maria in Spanish / Italian / Greek / Slavic , Maryam in Arabic, Marie in French… they all refer to the same person.

[Anonymous]

This would have been fine in the 90s when "eThNiCiTy is a construct" ruled the liberal paradigm.

It ain't the 90s.