Bringing toddler to lunch with friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

1. You did say that, twice. Three times if you include this post.

"Husbands don’t go out to lunch with their guy friends. Nice try though."
"I said guys don’t get together with their friends for lunch. They just don’t."
"It’s just not a thing."

2. Why does it bother you that men have lunch with their friends? What a bizarre hill to die on.

Of course men have lunch with friends. Of course men have free time without their child. Instead of pretending it doesn't exist, why don't you dig into the cultural and societal issues that make it fine for men but not women. No one is telling men "Oh you're such a bad friend if you don't want to hang around with your friends' children". And yet, some are saying that exact thing about women.

You’re funny.

It’s the “cultural and societal issues” that explain WHY men don’t socialize with other men the way women do with other women — including lunch.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-pathways-of-experience/202304/male-friendship-why-its-hard-for-men-to-bond-closely

People are literally telling you about their men and how they socialize. I think pp is right. You don't have any friends and simply can't fathom a world in which someone invites you to enjoy a meal with them. Sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Any husbands have this issue?

They definitely aren't dragging kids to meet up with their friends ..

Men typically don’t lose their identities when they have kids. So no, they don’t bring their kids everywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

DP. It’s rare. It’s why you’ve heard “ladies who lunch” and not “gentlemen who lunch.”

Really though this argument is a waste of time and distracting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

Not really. It’s like how they don’t go on walks together. It’s out of fear they will be assumed to be gay.

Also considering many men can’t plan or manage a schedule, they are going to struggle to get friends together at a specific time and place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

1. You did say that, twice. Three times if you include this post.

"Husbands don’t go out to lunch with their guy friends. Nice try though."
"I said guys don’t get together with their friends for lunch. They just don’t."
"It’s just not a thing."

2. Why does it bother you that men have lunch with their friends? What a bizarre hill to die on.

Of course men have lunch with friends. Of course men have free time without their child. Instead of pretending it doesn't exist, why don't you dig into the cultural and societal issues that make it fine for men but not women. No one is telling men "Oh you're such a bad friend if you don't want to hang around with your friends' children". And yet, some are saying that exact thing about women.

You’re funny.

It’s the “cultural and societal issues” that explain WHY men don’t socialize with other men the way women do with other women — including lunch.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-pathways-of-experience/202304/male-friendship-why-its-hard-for-men-to-bond-closely

"According to a 2021 survey of 2,000 adults, 15 percent of the male respondents said they had no close friends at all. (That compares to 3 percent who said this in 1990.)"

Must be you?

My husband has a small group of close friends, that he's known for 25+ years, and through those friends have made friends with the overlapping larger groups. We just hung out with a bunch of them over the weekend. A few of the WAGs, but otherwise 20+ dudes. I do agree that lack male friendship is contributing to the male loneliness epidemic, but to say that NO men have friends or NO men have lunch with their friends is just crazy talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women are expected to work like they don’t have kids and raise kids like they don’t work. Now we’re expected to maintain friendships as if we don’t have kids? Hard pass. Moms don’t need that kind of pressure, and if you can’t understand kids are part of the picture for a few years, no need to continue the friendship.

Everyone knows this. OP got a pity invite because her friends didn’t want to drop her, but they don’t expect her to show up with the toddler to their group lunch. They politely ask just to keep her in the loop and her job is to politely decline and eventually everyone will move on.

If friendship is equivalent to putting on airs and feigning your version of politeness, this just seems sad.

For all of you who don’t want your friends to bring their kids, have you considered just making your invite clear of that intention rather than completely dropping your friend when they bring their kid????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

Not really. It’s like how they don’t go on walks together. It’s out of fear they will be assumed to be gay.

Also considering many men can’t plan or manage a schedule, they are going to struggle to get friends together at a specific time and place.

LOL no. Idk anyone who is afraid of walking or eating with another man because people will assume they're gay. First, most people don't think that, and second, most people don't care what randos passing in the street think. Many men are in charge of scheduling and managing at work.

Stop projecting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

DP. It’s rare. It’s why you’ve heard “ladies who lunch” and not “gentlemen who lunch.”

Really though this argument is a waste of time and distracting.

Ladies who lunch are sahms or sahws, while the men were at work. This trope is like, from my grandmothers time. Time to update your references.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

Not really. It’s like how they don’t go on walks together. It’s out of fear they will be assumed to be gay.

Also considering many men can’t plan or manage a schedule, they are going to struggle to get friends together at a specific time and place.

This makes me wonder why golf isn't coded as gay. It is just walking around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Any husbands have this issue?

They definitely aren't dragging kids to meet up with their friends ..

Men typically don’t lose their identities when they have kids. So no, they don’t bring their kids everywhere.

Is this just all it is? It seems like women aren't allowed to have a separate identity once they have kids. That somehow, if you retain part of your own identity, you're less of a mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Huh? Have you been in public lately? Time to get out of your mommys basement. Plenty of men have lunch with their male friends outside of work. Do you actually believe his doesn't happen?

Not really. It’s like how they don’t go on walks together. It’s out of fear they will be assumed to be gay.

Also considering many men can’t plan or manage a schedule, they are going to struggle to get friends together at a specific time and place.

This makes me wonder why golf isn't coded as gay. It is just walking around.

Talking about their "strokes" and whatnot too.
And that is quite a "male friend" orientated activity. Usually concludes with drinks (with other men!) or a meal (with other men!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

1. You did say that, twice. Three times if you include this post.

"Husbands don’t go out to lunch with their guy friends. Nice try though."
"I said guys don’t get together with their friends for lunch. They just don’t."
"It’s just not a thing."

2. Why does it bother you that men have lunch with their friends? What a bizarre hill to die on.

Of course men have lunch with friends. Of course men have free time without their child. Instead of pretending it doesn't exist, why don't you dig into the cultural and societal issues that make it fine for men but not women. No one is telling men "Oh you're such a bad friend if you don't want to hang around with your friends' children". And yet, some are saying that exact thing about women.

You’re funny.

It’s the “cultural and societal issues” that explain WHY men don’t socialize with other men the way women do with other women — including lunch.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-pathways-of-experience/202304/male-friendship-why-its-hard-for-men-to-bond-closely

People are literally telling you about their men and how they socialize. I think pp is right. You don't have any friends and simply can't fathom a world in which someone invites you to enjoy a meal with them. Sad.

People are telling anecdotes. That’s all. Doesn’t detract from my point. Nor does
getting nasty and personal and hateful because you disagree. Not persuasive, not becoming, and frankly more childish behavior than that of the toddler you want to bring with you to lunch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

Noticed this also. Men tend to prefer to eat alone at lunch, while women are more about talking than eating at lunch.

Sounds like you follow some red pill podcast stuff. "Women just yap"

Touch a nerve?
Guess what small talk socializing is? Yapping. Gossiping. Prattle. Babbling.
It is what it is.
Not like you are solving great philosophical debates over mimosas at brunch.
Also.....
Podcasts??
You need to get out of your bubble and experience the world. You are too narrowminded.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, I’m not saying that men NEVER meet up with their male friends for lunch outside of work. Of course it happens. But not as much as women. It’s just not a thing. There ARE some differences between male and female social interactions you know. Stop getting all worked up over something so obvious.

1. You did say that, twice. Three times if you include this post.

"Husbands don’t go out to lunch with their guy friends. Nice try though."
"I said guys don’t get together with their friends for lunch. They just don’t."
"It’s just not a thing."

2. Why does it bother you that men have lunch with their friends? What a bizarre hill to die on.

Of course men have lunch with friends. Of course men have free time without their child. Instead of pretending it doesn't exist, why don't you dig into the cultural and societal issues that make it fine for men but not women. No one is telling men "Oh you're such a bad friend if you don't want to hang around with your friends' children". And yet, some are saying that exact thing about women.

You’re funny.

It’s the “cultural and societal issues” that explain WHY men don’t socialize with other men the way women do with other women — including lunch.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-pathways-of-experience/202304/male-friendship-why-its-hard-for-men-to-bond-closely

People are literally telling you about their men and how they socialize. I think pp is right. You don't have any friends and simply can't fathom a world in which someone invites you to enjoy a meal with them. Sad.

People are telling anecdotes. That’s all. Doesn’t detract from my point. Nor does
getting nasty and personal and hateful because you disagree. Not persuasive, not becoming, and frankly more childish behavior than that of the toddler you want to bring with you to lunch.

Yes, personal anecdotes, that prove your statements wrong. That's kind of what happens when you make blanket statements about 4 billion people

If you want to make more friends, you should try! If all you males are so lonely, there must be something you can bond over. Well, besides eating, drinking, walking or probably talking, because you think that makes you gay.