Most embarrassing naked moment

[Anonymous]

This didn’t happen to me but my friend was there. Law firm associates (including my friend) threw a surprise birthday party for a female colleague. Someone had a key to her apartment. They huddled in the kitchen to surprise her when she came home. She zipped upstairs fast, then came downstairs butt naked, calling for her dog, who the associates kept with them in the kitchen. Strategically placed peanut butter smears on her privates. It was absolutely devastating and I’ve never forgotten this story. Nothing beats this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This didn’t happen to me but my friend was there. Law firm associates (including my friend) threw a surprise birthday party for a female colleague. Someone had a key to her apartment. They huddled in the kitchen to surprise her when she came home. She zipped upstairs fast, then came downstairs butt naked, calling for her dog, who the associates kept with them in the kitchen. Strategically placed peanut butter smears on her privates. It was absolutely devastating and I’ve never forgotten this story. Nothing beats this.

Urban legend.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/the-lap-dog/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It happened about five years ago when DH and I were recent empty nesters with our youngest being a freshman in college.

Early one Saturday morning after some (very loud) sex, I went down to the kitchen in the nude to get some ice water. On my way back up I heard the bathroom door down the hallway open. Not only did that startle and confuse me because there wasn’t supposed to be anybody else in the house, but out came DS19 still in a sleepy fog…and also completely nude. I screamed, he let out an expletive or two, and we both disappeared into our rooms until getting up the nerve to face each other at breakfast.

It turns out he had decided to come home that weekend and pay us a surprise visit. After arriving in the middle of the night, he went to bed and then woke up to go to the bathroom assuming the coast was clear since nobody would be awake that early. Just. Really. Bad. Timing. But we can both at least laugh about it now. DH thought it was hilarious from the beginning.

Sooo…why was he also nude? It’s obvious why you were but seems kind of weirdly coincidental that he was also.

Not the PP to whom you're responding, but: Why does it seem "weirdly coincidental" to you, with your "Soooo..." as if it's odd? There are many people who sleep in the nude; even if you claim you don't know anyone who does it, well, there really is such a thing, and it's not inherently sexual. Or maybe, since he came home as a surprise and maybe on the spur of the moment, the kid forgot to bring any pajamas and didn't want to sleep in underwear. Or, sure, maybe he'd been enjoying himself solo earlier that night and didn't bother to put anything on afterward. It's weird that you find it weird for someone to be in a bedroom or a bed while naked, whatever their reason.

This. Sleepwear preference is not a subject anybody talks about other than with close friends and in anonymous forums, because why would we need to? How I go to bed at night is a very personal choice and probably not known to anyone other than my spouse. I’m an introvert, pretty conservative, not a risk taker…nobody would peg me for someone who wears nothing to bed 80% of the time and swims and lounges naked by the poolside after dark, yet it’s true.

Trust me, PP who thinks it’s “weirdly coincidental” - you have many relatives and friends who enjoy non-sexual nudity, be it sleeping nude, walking around naked when home alone, skinny dipping, cleaning or doing household chores in the nude on occasion, generally wanting to be free of clothing when it’s not necessary, perhaps all of the above, etc. You just don’t know who they are. You’d probably be surprised if you did and maybe you’d loosen up a little.

Dp -- what on earth do these traits and values have to do with comfort being nude? Are you saying introverts, conservatives and the risk-averse are prudes? I don't get it. I've always thought sleeping nude has to do with body temperature, housemate, and bed comfort factors. How would anyone come to the conclusion that based on those traits you would be uncomfortable being naked?

Meaning that there’s always an inherent risk of accidentally being seen naked where it wouldn’t be just assumed that one is naked (basically anywhere other than the shower) unless doors are always locked, blinds are always shut, and it’s never outside, which isn’t likely to be the case every single time casual nudity is enjoyed. Yet even many people who are otherwise cautious and reserved find it to be a risk worth taking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This didn’t happen to me but my friend was there. Law firm associates (including my friend) threw a surprise birthday party for a female colleague. Someone had a key to her apartment. They huddled in the kitchen to surprise her when she came home. She zipped upstairs fast, then came downstairs butt naked, calling for her dog, who the associates kept with them in the kitchen. Strategically placed peanut butter smears on her privates. It was absolutely devastating and I’ve never forgotten this story. Nothing beats this.

Urban legend.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/the-lap-dog/

Thank you. Snopes helps catch these "it happened to my friend!" tall tales.

[Anonymous]

I got very drunk at my brother-in-law’s bachelor party a couple nights before his wedding to my sister. I was sharing a hotel room with my parents, so the guys brought me back and put me to bed, removing my shoes and jeans in order to make me more comfortable. The problem? It just so happened that I had gone commando that day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Birth. There I was all naked and everything hanging out.

IDK, I found that aspect of birth kinda liberating.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This didn’t happen to me but my friend was there. Law firm associates (including my friend) threw a surprise birthday party for a female colleague. Someone had a key to her apartment. They huddled in the kitchen to surprise her when she came home. She zipped upstairs fast, then came downstairs butt naked, calling for her dog, who the associates kept with them in the kitchen. Strategically placed peanut butter smears on her privates. It was absolutely devastating and I’ve never forgotten this story. Nothing beats this.

She must have been cucumber girl as a teen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college boyfriend and I were getting busy in our hotel room when some man used a key card to walk right in! He yelled “I’m sorry!“ And slammed the door. We called the front desk and they said they accidentally face the wrong key put, and then had the audacity to say we should’ve had the chain on the door! But we were college kids so didn’t do anything… if it happened now I would’ve demanded some sort of Credit.

This same basic thing happened to a couple girlfriends of mine while studying abroad in Italy in college, except that it didn’t involve anything sexual. They were each just sleeping naked in their own beds on opposite sides of the room around midnight when the door loudly opened and it turned out to be an older couple who were supposed to be in the room next door but were given the wrong key at the front desk. It’s actually terrifying to think what could have happened had it been some predator who got the wrong key and walked in on two vulnerable 20-year-old women.

I was on the other end of this once - I was given a key card and room number, but when I walked in, I saw clothes strewn about the room and heard the shower running. Luckily I did not see the occupant! I have no idea if he knew he'd been walked in on. I backed out of the room, ran downstairs and requested a new room. They apologized profusely and gave me a major upgrade ... I was like, that's cool, but the guy in that room up there is the one you really need to apologize to, whether he knows it or not!

Now I always use the chain/bolt when I'm in a hotel room. And when I'm entering a new hotel room for the first time, I crack the door open and pause for just a second before opening it all the way.

I always pause at the door and holler "Anyone in this room?". And I keep the door open when I do a quick check with my phone in hand to ensure that there is no one lurking inside. And then I close the door and lock it and engage the privacy chain. I always have a chair against the door of the hotel. Always.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This didn’t happen to me but my friend was there. Law firm associates (including my friend) threw a surprise birthday party for a female colleague. Someone had a key to her apartment. They huddled in the kitchen to surprise her when she came home. She zipped upstairs fast, then came downstairs butt naked, calling for her dog, who the associates kept with them in the kitchen. Strategically placed peanut butter smears on her privates. It was absolutely devastating and I’ve never forgotten this story. Nothing beats this.

Plus who keeps peanut butter in their bedroom, not the kitchen?

Urban legend.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/the-lap-dog/

Thank you. Snopes helps catch these "it happened to my friend!" tall tales.

[Anonymous]

Sneaking out for a skinny dip in our backyard pool after midnight and realizing my parents were already out there relaxing under the stars in the adjacent hot tub. I had left my bedroom wearing nothing but flip flops because all the towels were outside, and I’m the motion sensor spotlight I had to walk through left little to the imagination…

[Anonymous]

My reaction was embarrassing. I went to the sauna in a hotel in Prague. I knew it was mixed-gender but didn't expect people to be naked. I walk in, and there is a naked man sitting on the upper bench. I tried to look chill, so I smiled while his penis was right in front of me. So it looked like I'm really happy to see his penis...

[Anonymous]

I forgot that I was wearing swim shorts instead of a two piece bottom underneath gym shorts. I bent over and pulled down my "gym shorts" and realized when I felt air on my bare butt that I had totally mooned the pool with my whole enchilada.

My two saving graces- it was my sister's pool and we are twins. So I'm forever hoping her neighborhood pool thinks she mooned them and not me.

[Anonymous]

Was at a party and went to use the bathroom. Opened the door and a man was pooping in there, completely naked. I can kind of understand taking your pants off, but your shirt? At someone else’s house? Why??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was at a party and went to use the bathroom. Opened the door and a man was pooping in there, completely naked. I can kind of understand taking your pants off, but your shirt? At someone else’s house? Why??

well, at home maybe. But at someone else’s place? NO WAY!

It’s like George Costanza taking off his shirt to poop on that Seinfeld episode. Just, why??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Took a quick dip in the pool to cool off one hot summer night when I was around 17. Silly to bother wearing anything to swim at 4 am, right? I reclined in a lounge chair to dry off in the breeze for a couple minutes. Next thing I know I’m seeing daylight through my eyelids and hearing my mother’s voice saying, “Ummm, young lady! You had two bathing suits hanging right over there on the line. They’re not just going to jump out at you.” Thanks, Ma. Luckily our back yard faced the woods.

Hehe. At least she only had a problem with laziness and not necessarily skinny dipping. Not sure how my parents would have reacted to finding me passed out nude on a lounge chair in broad daylight.