I am sad for DD--this past weekend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What on Earth is Viva Vienna and who the hell cares about it

It's a spring festival. I don't why all these mommies think it's like the prom of Vienna. My teens had zero interest in going - it's geared towards younger children. I asked and they said "that's for babies, mom, ugh" so maybe OP's kids are like 11/12?

That’s my recollection. Like parents take their kids when they are younger, and then the kids want to go once on their own when they are 11 or 12, and then it’s just kind of lame and best avoided unless you’ve never matured beyond middle school.

[Anonymous]

My kid texted a friend on Tuesday before Viva Vienna about going on Saturday in a small group and the friend said they were going on Wednesday and couldn'tgo on Saturday. The fair was Saturday to Monday. They met up but didn't plan anything because the friend can't plan. Don't take it too seriously. It was just a couple of hours they missed to hang out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of mean girls turned mean mommies on this thread!

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why kids shouldn't have social media. You sound very immature if you are sad about this.

You wouldn't feel sad if your kids were sad about something?

No, I don't let their emotions impact mine.

There’s an expression about how mothers can only be as happy as their saddest kid. If their heart is breaking so is mine.

+1

Such a lack of empathy on this thread by the mean mommies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

+1

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

+1

This is the exact point.

Some of you are the mean moms with the mean kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Grown woman saying girls are asking to cat called and assaulted based on what they wearing is crazy to me. This thread is a bunch of possessive helicopters who believe judging other young kids is a healthy hobby

They aren't saying the girls are asking to be cat called and assaulted. They are saying that the girls are asking to be looked at and admired. As one PP put it, the girls are not wearing those clothes because they are comfy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What on Earth is Viva Vienna and who the hell cares about it

It's a spring festival. I don't why all these mommies think it's like the prom of Vienna. My teens had zero interest in going - it's geared towards younger children. I asked and they said "that's for babies, mom, ugh" so maybe OP's kids are like 11/12?

That’s my recollection. Like parents take their kids when they are younger, and then the kids want to go once on their own when they are 11 or 12, and then it’s just kind of lame and best avoided unless you’ve never matured beyond middle school.

VV is not lame. And isn't the very definition of "middle school" is to call something "lame" that you don't like?

My kids are in college but they did the VV thing for years when younger. Looking at the fair through the eyes of a tween or young teenager it is easy to see the attraction: carnival rides, not the usual things to eat (funnel cakes!), bands and music and tons of activity. Just a really lively and fun scene. AND it is the type of family destination where parents took their young ones years before and probably then a few years later let their now older elementary and middle school kids go on their own. So for many kids VV is one of their first taste of independence they have, attending with friends and not their parents. That is a big deal to a 11 or 12 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

OP said her kids reached out to friends but never heard back. They weren't waiting around for an invitation. And my 15 yo DS would rather die than go to VV with his 13 year old sister and possibly see his friends there....

That's kinda sad.

Yeah. It is. My kids (opposite genders, similar age difference) would hang out together and offer each other comfort in a situation like this. It’s one of the best thing about having siblings. Sure it’s not ideal but it does strengthen their bond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

+1

+2. And every time this topic comes up, moms come on here to say this is just the way it is and our kids should just deal with their kids’ poor behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

So what? If the kids didn’t respond within a reasonable time, you move on and make other plans. Not sit home, sulk, and stalk social media trying to see if they are there without you. The absence of a response is a no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems like every kid we know went to Viva Vienna with someone this weekend and no one invited or included my DD (13) or DS (15). They both reached out to friends and no one got back to them but they know from the socials that they were there. It's so disheartening when your teens aren't inclusive. They have friends and we host plenty so it's not a regular issue but it was very much in their face this weekend.
I don't have a question but a general sense of sadness for my kids and putting this PSA out to parents to teach your kids to be inclusive.

I offered to go with them to Viva Vienna but they said they'd rather die than be seen with their mom there.

I’d like to out a PSA out to parents to not let your kids on social media. This causes horrendous FOMO, social anxiety, pain and anguish!!! If your kids weren’t invited help them make their own plans especially if they invited kids who didn’t respond. We have to be proactive about these things!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

+1

This is the exact point.

Some of you are the mean moms with the mean kids.

As long as it isn’t THEIR kid who is being excluded they don’t care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You won’t be invited to every thing. Grow a backbone. They could have went with each other and had a good time. Don’t sit around waiting for an invitation.

It wasn’t a party with invitations. The two kids texted friends about meeting up with them or going with them and they rudely never responded.

I’ve taught my kids not to exclude someone if they ask to join in. Whether it’s a birthday party or just hanging out. Unfortunately most mothers just don’t care and they pass that lack of empathy on to their kids.

+1

This is the exact point.

Some of you are the mean moms with the mean kids.

As long as it isn’t THEIR kid who is being excluded they don’t care.

No kids get invited to everything or get to have all the plans they are thinking of work out how they want. Move on. One plan doesn’t pan out make other. If your kid is sitting on social media feeling sorry for themselves, that is a fail for both of you.