Father not involved in child’s life

[Anonymous]

I hope when she dude for support, he sues for full custody.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope when she dude for support, he sues for full custody.

Kid is at disadvantage in every scenario here because of how irresponsible both parents are.

[Anonymous]

Its possible he just used her as a rebound then discarded?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She should file for child support. She should enter therapy to understand why she did such a shitty thing to a child instead of going to a sperm bank and why she is foisting her own abandonment issues onto a new generation. I know our culture sends a message that says this is okay. It is not okay, for either of them.

What? This doesn’t make sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope when she dude for support, he sues for full custody.

He's never met his two-year-old, by his own choice. Obviously he's not getting full custody of a toddler he's chosen never to meet. If he wanted visitation and then partial custody, he could. Maybe the prospect of child support would push him in that direction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope when she dude for support, he sues for full custody.

He’s entitled to 50%. If the kids dad wants 50% then OP gets her wish of an involved dad.

Now, would a judge assign 50% to someone who has evaded all responsibility for his child to this point, probably not, but if OP sues for child support then she’s going to get more money and more involvement than she has now— again, win-win.

[Anonymous]

She's a single mother and it's best that she just get that in her head and not count on the father to do anything. You can't make a man be a father. The courts will make him pay child support, but they can't make him be a man. Unfortunately, only time will tell how this will all pan out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He told her to abort the child and she was hesitant. In the end, she decided to keep the baby. He never asked about her during the pregnancy or his son until now. When she met him, he was separated from his ex-wife and was always involved with his other 2 children. He was really hands on and a doting father to them. But if he can be loving towards the children of his ex, why can’t he be loving towards his own son as well? That’s the confusing part.

My friend talks about this, so it’s not like I’m involving myself in her business. Would it be a good idea if one of my friend’s parent meets her ex and confronts him about why he is not involved in his son’s life?

No. Her parents will not make this man suddenly become a father to his child. How can he be a father to his other children and not hers? Because he's an asswipe. Some people are just able to detach from their child(ren).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope when she dude for support, he sues for full custody.

He’s entitled to 50%. If the kids dad wants 50% then OP gets her wish of an involved dad.

Now, would a judge assign 50% to someone who has evaded all responsibility for his child to this point, probably not, but if OP sues for child support then she’s going to get more money and more involvement than she has now— again, win-win.

hard no on that, once divorced or separated neither parent has any entitlement at all to the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why hasn’t she filed for child support?

I know two women who never filed for child support from their "sperm donors". They didn't want to deal with the guy nor did they want to risk losing any custody. They were able to support themselves. My cousin remarried and the kid was adopted by her new husband. The other has stayed single, but the now young adult child has a relationship with his father (and the father's side of the family).

That's all fine and dandy, but this lady needs to file for child support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NO to the parents getting involved.

There's nothing either of you can do. He's decided and made it very clear that he does not want a relationship with his child. You can't force someone to have a relationship. Expecting him to suddenly change and become an involved parent is magical thinking.

After trying for over two years with no change in his position, it's time for you and your friend to drop it. If you want to help your friend, help her to move on.

OP here. It’s a quite sad situation overall. I’m trying to be very supportive for her as much as I can.

When my friend’s son will start going to school, he would probably ask her, where is my father? What does she tell him then?

What did she think she'll say to the kid when she decided to have him without father's consent?

Father's consent was when he had sex with Mother without using a condom or having had a vasectomy.

She said she was on the pill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NO to the parents getting involved.

There's nothing either of you can do. He's decided and made it very clear that he does not want a relationship with his child. You can't force someone to have a relationship. Expecting him to suddenly change and become an involved parent is magical thinking.

After trying for over two years with no change in his position, it's time for you and your friend to drop it. If you want to help your friend, help her to move on.

OP here. It’s a quite sad situation overall. I’m trying to be very supportive for her as much as I can.

When my friend’s son will start going to school, he would probably ask her, where is my father? What does she tell him then?

What did she think she'll say to the kid when she decided to have him without father's consent?

Father's consent was when he had sex with Mother without using a condom or having had a vasectomy.

She said she was on the pill.

Which means he’s consenting to a 1 in 10 chance of pregnancy assuming normal use. If he wants a 0% chance he needed a vasectomy and a condom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He told her to abort the child and she was hesitant. In the end, she decided to keep the baby. He never asked about her during the pregnancy or his son until now. When she met him, he was separated from his ex-wife and was always involved with his other 2 children. He was really hands on and a doting father to them. But if he can be loving towards the children of his ex, why can’t he be loving towards his own son as well? That’s the confusing part.

My friend talks about this, so it’s not like I’m involving myself in her business. Would it be a good idea if one of my friend’s parent meets her ex and confronts him about why he is not involved in his son’s life?

Is the father a Republican politician?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope when she dude for support, he sues for full custody.

He’s entitled to 50%. If the kids dad wants 50% then OP gets her wish of an involved dad.

Now, would a judge assign 50% to someone who has evaded all responsibility for his child to this point, probably not, but if OP sues for child support then she’s going to get more money and more involvement than she has now— again, win-win.

hard no on that, once divorced or separated neither parent has any entitlement at all to the child.

In many if not most states now, the law presumes 50/50 custody. In my state, if this father wanted it, he'd probably get it.

[Anonymous]

Your friend should have gotten an abortion. She made the decision to keep a baby.

Does the guy have money? Maybe file for child support. I personally wouldn’t.