47 with a 9 yo. Feel exhausted

[Anonymous]

I had my last on at 38. I feel so exhausted with job, sports/ activities for kids and housework. I worry sometimes if I would be able to launch my last one successfully. I just wish sometimes I had my kids when I was younger. I love them all so much but just don’t have enough energy and time to do everything. Does anyone else feel the same way?

[Anonymous]

OP again wanted to add husband does help. I do have a cleaning service.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry. I'm 46 with an 8 yo and I feel ya about being tied. When was your last check up with bloodwork? I was severely Vit D deficient and that made all the difference. It will also help you figure out of you're in peri. Can you afford to hire help?

I actually love having kids as an older mom. I've had an amazing career and while I'm still working, i feel retired in mindset. I feel like I got to have it all.

Can you hire help?

[Anonymous]

When my mom was 47 she had kids 5, 11, 12 and 14 yrs old, a full time job, a house to take care of, not enough income and that's when her marriage fell apart. She was exhausted all the time and really struggled getting us all through our teen years. She was a great mom but it was rough. We all turned out pretty good though.

I had my kids young, when I was 47 my granddaughter was five. Lots of people now look down on that but I wouldn't have had it any other way.

[Anonymous]

Check your ferritin and iron scores

[Anonymous]

I’m the same -/ had my youngest at 39, totally unexpected. I do think you might be at the hardest point.

[Anonymous]

I second the suggestion to get bloodwork done. I had my kids at 40 and 42. It was bone-tiring when they were younger, but once they were school aged things got progressively easier.

[Anonymous]

I had my last at 38 too. I’m 46 with a 7 year old and two teens. I definitely have less energy. I don’t work though so I can handle the three kids.

[Anonymous]

Same. 48 with a 10 year old.

[Anonymous]

If they are sleeping well through the night are you having sleep issues? If they are not I would try melatonin the liquid drops. If you are not I would check your hormone levels could be perimenopause? Otherwise could be iron, thyroid, hashimotos. I say this because I had my surprise baby at 45 and while the pregnancy and sleep deprivation was exhausting after that phase I mostly bounced back and am back on the monkey bars with them.

[Anonymous]

Thank you all for responding. OP here I do have thyroid. I see my other friends being done in 3-4 years but I am in long haul as the 9 yo will not be in college anytime soon. I dream of retired life where I am not waking up early in morning to pack lunches and make breakfast or rushing home to cook dinner and drive around activities. I know it sounds horrible but I just would like to get a book and curl up or for once just live for my self. Sounds horrible I know but I didn’t really live my life on my terms or my way just living for others all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they are sleeping well through the night are you having sleep issues? If they are not I would try melatonin the liquid drops. If you are not I would check your hormone levels could be perimenopause? Otherwise could be iron, thyroid, hashimotos. I say this because I had my surprise baby at 45 and while the pregnancy and sleep deprivation was exhausting after that phase I mostly bounced back and am back on the monkey bars with them.

Good point my average sleep is about 6 hours a day. Not that I have trouble sleeping but can’t get to bed earlier than 10-10.30 and wake up at 4-4.30 in morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they are sleeping well through the night are you having sleep issues? If they are not I would try melatonin the liquid drops. If you are not I would check your hormone levels could be perimenopause? Otherwise could be iron, thyroid, hashimotos. I say this because I had my surprise baby at 45 and while the pregnancy and sleep deprivation was exhausting after that phase I mostly bounced back and am back on the monkey bars with them.

Good point my average sleep is about 6 hours a day. Not that I have trouble sleeping but can’t get to bed earlier than 10-10.30 and wake up at 4-4.30 in morning.

HUH? Of COURSE you are tired. You aren't getting enough sleep! Why are you waking up at 4am??

And you say above you have thyroid issues? Are you seeing an endocrinologist regularly for that? You should if not. Your PCP might not be managing it correctly. And you should go for an annual physical if you haven't already

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they are sleeping well through the night are you having sleep issues? If they are not I would try melatonin the liquid drops. If you are not I would check your hormone levels could be perimenopause? Otherwise could be iron, thyroid, hashimotos. I say this because I had my surprise baby at 45 and while the pregnancy and sleep deprivation was exhausting after that phase I mostly bounced back and am back on the monkey bars with them.

Good point my average sleep is about 6 hours a day. Not that I have trouble sleeping but can’t get to bed earlier than 10-10.30 and wake up at 4-4.30 in morning.

HUH? Of COURSE you are tired. You aren't getting enough sleep! Why are you waking up at 4am??

And you say above you have thyroid issues? Are you seeing an endocrinologist regularly for that? You should if not. Your PCP might not be managing it correctly. And you should go for an annual physical if you haven't already

The only way I can work out iOS if get up early .

[Anonymous]

I am 39 and my youngest is 5 so I am a bit younger, but 3 kids are still exhausting.

What I think helps me feel better is going for a run every day and working from home so I feel I can always carve out some me time.
I also have someone that picks up my kids from school and then a few middle schoolers that come to play with younger one a couple of days a week so I can finish my work day.

Can you afford someone to drive and pick up your kids so you are not so rushed?

If I had to do school pick up (3 different schools this year), I would have to take 1 hour off from work (at 3 pm)