Sharing pronouns at work

[Anonymous]

Yesterday my company had an Inclusivity training for managers, and during this training one of the topics discussed was micro aggressions in the workplace. The goal was to educate managers on all things that could be perceived as offensive to employees.

One thing that came up is the use of pronouns in our email signatures as well as when we introduce ourselves in meetings. The facilitator of the training said it’s offensive and unsupportive for ALL employees to not follow this protocol of including our pronouns.

The company asked us to start including/using them a year or so ago and maybe 50% of employees max do. I am one of the employees who does not list or proactively share my pronouns, which I feel is equally my right to do.

What I don’t understand is how this specific inaction OFFENDS others and looks like I am not supportive. As a straight female does listing she/her/hers indicate support? Overall my company is very inclusive and a decent number of employees are not straight, so this is definitely not just a handful of people being singled out.

Now we have all been asked again to add our pronouns by the end of the week or it will signal to employees that we don’t support equality or something like that. I truly don’t understand. Can someone enlighten me?

Again I am all for anyone listing their pronouns who wants to, I don’t understand why it’s essentially mandatory for all to do so.

[Anonymous]

I don’t have mine listed in my email signature, though they are on my business cards. (I should have them in my signature; I just keep forgetting.) It’s important for cisgender people to proactively give their pronouns so that trans people aren’t the only ones giving theirs. If it becomes normalized to share pronouns proactively, then trans people who aren’t totally comfortable telling everyone they’re trans (which is reasonable, given the state of trans rights) will be able to let everyone know their pronouns without having to go out of their way or be singled out.

[Anonymous]

The answer is that everyone listing pronouns makes it easier for people with non-obvious ones to announce theirs without having to feel as singled out.

I’m confused why you find it so uncomfortable to list yours. All you need to do is update your signature one time and it’s done. It’s not like this makes added work for you.

[Anonymous]

I would say that for a cis person to not list pronouns is definitely not offensive (I can’t imagine taking offense at it) but I can see how it could be viewed as unsupportive, as most Junior employees don’t want to be the ones opening themselves up to criticism or discrimination by being the only person listing/requesting specific pronouns but if their (cis) manager has them, they can feel more comfortable letting people know their gender identity.

However, I think enforcing sharing pronouns for all employees is equally problematic as it isn’t necessarily supportive of people who are transitioning or uncomfortable being out at work: they’re forced to choose between coming out when they’re not ready or misgendering themselves. Personally, I’d like to see a mix of pronouns and no pronouns in email signatures and complete respect for requested pronouns (via signature or verbally).

[Anonymous]

You have a right to refuse stupidity.

[Anonymous]

Why is not stating pronouns all of the sudden a problem? If yours are nonobvious, state them.

[Anonymous]

The only time I’m glad to see this is when the name is gender neutral. Tyler/Jordan/Taylor/Charlie/etc.

Too many misgendering a unintentionally got me ptsd lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is not stating pronouns all of the sudden a problem? If yours are nonobvious, state them.

As PPs said, it’s about making it less awkward for people who have nonobvious ones.

[Anonymous]

Wouldn't forcing people to do this also be a micro-aggression?

I will never understand this sort of thing. Many of us don't even use email signature files at work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't forcing people to do this also be a micro-aggression?

I will never understand this sort of thing. Many of us don't even use email signature files at work.

+1 (although we all have email signatures at my firm).

[Anonymous]

I am queer and will never “proactively” share my pronouns. I’m a woman. It’s obvious. This is such virtue signaling bs I can’t even. This makes me so mad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't forcing people to do this also be a micro-aggression?

I will never understand this sort of thing. Many of us don't even use email signature files at work.

Yep. I’m all for do whatever you want, but the coercion of it gets me.

[Anonymous]

Don’t comply and I’ll refer to you as “they” in all correspondence.

It’s not a big deal.

Do you really use a signature block for every email?

Is it so hard to follow the company standard?

If you don’t use a signature block don’t worry about it and get use to being a “they”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't forcing people to do this also be a micro-aggression?

In what way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't forcing people to do this also be a micro-aggression?

I will never understand this sort of thing. Many of us don't even use email signature files at work.

Following standards is not a micro-aggression.