Is 58 too old for 38?

[Anonymous]

I'm a woman 38 years old as of last Saturday. Have met a nice man ( at the dog park) and we've hit off. The one thing giving me pause is the age difference.
Though I'm not looking for anything serious, not do I plan on having kids.
I'm also seeing a guy who is younger but closer to my age we aren't exactly exclusive but neither of us is seeing anyone else yet.
What are your thoughts on both situations?.

[Anonymous]

Do you see yourself ever wanting to get married? Would you be happy to be this man’s caretaker for the last 15-20 years of his life? He’s at that age now where he should be considering his later years.

[Anonymous]

It's not too old. Rule of thumb is half the older partner's age plus 7 years. 58/2 = 29. 29 + 7 = 36. It's fine. It's kind of May-December, but it's; fine. If you like the guy, go for it. He's probably counting his lucky stars that you're interested.

[Anonymous]

In my experience people tend to fall apart pretty quickly after 70. He’s 12 years away from it; you’re 32. Just my $0.02.

[Anonymous]

I’m 37 and I definitely would not. I don’t understand why this is so normalized either. What on earth would you have in common?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not too old. Rule of thumb is half the older partner's age plus 7 years. 58/2 = 29. 29 + 7 = 36. It's fine. It's kind of May-December, but it's; fine. If you like the guy, go for it. He's probably counting his lucky stars that you're interested.

Who made this rule?

[Anonymous]

He’s not too old for right now. If you wanted something serious you need to keep in mind that when you are his age he will be 78.

For the younger guy, he’s also fine for right now. He could be good for long term too if he also doesn’t want kids.

[Anonymous]

I am newly 39, and my mom is 64. I wouldn’t date someone less than a decade older than my parents.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s fine for a younger woman to date an older man. The reverse is gross though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 37 and I definitely would not. I don’t understand why this is so normalized either. What on earth would you have in common?

Op here.
I can't speak for every pairing with the age difference. But for us it's believe it or not a similar upbringing. He's only a few years older than my oldest sibling.
A love of dogs. Similar taste in music. Same charitable activities.

There are things that give me pause like I'm only 12 years older than his daughter.

He's widowed and still wears a ring.


But at the same time I don't want to be married ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you see yourself ever wanting to get married? Would you be happy to be this man’s caretaker for the last 15-20 years of his life? He’s at that age now where he should be considering his later years.

No I don't ever want to be married. I've done the caregiving thing when one of my parents was on hospice so that's not a deterrent to me in any relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He’s not too old for right now. If you wanted something serious you need to keep in mind that when you are his age he will be 78.

For the younger guy, he’s also fine for right now. He could be good for long term too if he also doesn’t want kids.

The younger guy would be fine with or without, but he has a lot of cultural/ familial pressure for kids and marriage, and at 34 is considered quite old in his culture for not being a married father.

[Anonymous]

To be friends, fine. To date, no

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be friends, fine. To date, no

What about carnal friends? Maybe she wants to get with him carnally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be friends, fine. To date, no

What's the difference?