My sister just tried to stage a parenting intervention with me, basically

[Anonymous]

Have the kids never encountered anyone eating junk food or on electronics before? Does she have this chat with every parent she encounters who parents differently than her? Wonder how play dates work in her world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I would be extra careful not to create envy in her poor children - so no pulling out of iPads, no walking in with fries, etc. It’s good for your kids to have a detox from all that, frankly. You don’t need to live like this all year - just when your families get together.

I think OP's sister was way out of line, but I would do the same thing anyway. Let them eat whatever you want when they are with you, sure, but not in front of them. And no screens outside of your cottage. It's not like it will hurt them to have a little less screen time -- they can play a game with their cousins or read a book or help make dinner or whatever together. But I'd do it because (1) less screen time is better anyway, (2) if they don't get a lot of time with their cousins, I'd rather they were spending time with them instead of glued to a screen anyway, and (3) I was raised that flaunting things in front of people who don't have them is unkind. The cousins can't help their parents' rules; show them a little grace by doing things they can participate in.

PP you replied to. You said it so much better!

Both of you- best comments on the thread.

+1

no getting out of the car eating your french fries.

Has this happened before? Or been a pattern?

I mean, I agree that all sides should make attempts to keep the piece. But treating french fries like they are toxic goes too far. Sister needs to suck it up and realize that she can't demand that no french fries ever be within her children's sight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Why is this same sort of snark parroted here over and over? It's really not "helicopter" -- and by they you mean crazy and overbearing -- to not let you children eat garbage fast food and not let them become addicted to iPads/iPhones. It's actually HEALTHY and RESPONSIBLE. It's EASY to be a lazy ass parent who lets your kids be dullards who leave you alone while they're addicted to junk food, video games, iPads and whatever degeneracy and filth they can find online.

And then as a coping mechanism, you cling to the idea the kids raised better than yours will ACTUALLY turn out to be failures! I suspect you're the same trolls who obsessively post in the private school forum the same tired cliches about private school kids all being drug addicts.

Please point out where OP indicates that her children are addicted to junk food and screens, because I must have missed that part.

Moderation is key. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

Going to Burger King period SCREAMS low class addicted to fast food. Not Chick-fil-A or Panera or Sweetgreen...Burger King is basically dog food. Let alone while ON VACATION. OP also attempts to rationalize her kids being addicted to screens, it's all just really obvious.

Her sister doesn't sound crazy to me. Her sister sounds normal. Plus factor in the OP is likely exaggerating to sister's behavior to make her point and sway this message board.

More likely the sister is genuinely worried because her low class sister can't go a day without feeding her kids fast food. And maybe the sister detects other stunted behavior and maturity in her nieces and nephews.

I'm also guessing the sister is married and it sounds like OP is a single mom.

The fact that the sister’s kids have to have screens and junk food hidden from them to keep them from “going crazy” means the sister isn’t the stellar parent she thinks she is. Her kids’ reaction is abnormal.

I am not a fan of Burger King etc. and my kids never get fast food because we just don’t eat it ourselves, but they do get the occasional sweet treat (ice cream, cookies) and a limited amount of screen time. We socialize regularly with a family that limits neither - treats are readily accessible at their house and there are iPads just laying around (each kid has one). Never once have my kids “gone crazy” and tried to binge on sweets and have never tried to or asked to watch the iPads. In fact sometimes my kids will lost interest and walk away to play during their designated screen time. Something that is forbidden is always so much more tempting to a kid.

[Anonymous]

Sister out of line. Period. Tell her that. Move on.

[Anonymous]

At lunch my sister took me aside and told me, "out of kindness," how worried she is about my kids.

Clearly she took advice from DCUMers…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Why is this same sort of snark parroted here over and over? It's really not "helicopter" -- and by they you mean crazy and overbearing -- to not let you children eat garbage fast food and not let them become addicted to iPads/iPhones. It's actually HEALTHY and RESPONSIBLE. It's EASY to be a lazy ass parent who lets your kids be dullards who leave you alone while they're addicted to junk food, video games, iPads and whatever degeneracy and filth they can find online.

And then as a coping mechanism, you cling to the idea the kids raised better than yours will ACTUALLY turn out to be failures! I suspect you're the same trolls who obsessively post in the private school forum the same tired cliches about private school kids all being drug addicts.

Please point out where OP indicates that her children are addicted to junk food and screens, because I must have missed that part.

Moderation is key. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

Going to Burger King period SCREAMS low class addicted to fast food. Not Chick-fil-A or Panera or Sweetgreen...Burger King is basically dog food. Let alone while ON VACATION. OP also attempts to rationalize her kids being addicted to screens, it's all just really obvious.

Her sister doesn't sound crazy to me. Her sister sounds normal. Plus factor in the OP is likely exaggerating to sister's behavior to make her point and sway this message board.

More likely the sister is genuinely worried because her low class sister can't go a day without feeding her kids fast food. And maybe the sister detects other stunted behavior and maturity in her nieces and nephews.

I'm also guessing the sister is married and it sounds like OP is a single mom.

The person railing about "low class" is getting shirty about . . . Panera?

Irony truly is dead.

Chick-fil-A is the fast-food equivalent of Alinea! Didn’t you know? THE COMEDY WRITERS ARE OUT IN FORCE TODAY. Also laughing at the poster who suggested packing a sandwich before going on a Target run. What is this, Oregon Trail?

[Anonymous]

Cuss her out
Her kids will be wildin’ out in a few years
Her lack of perspective is astonishing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I would be extra careful not to create envy in her poor children - so no pulling out of iPads, no walking in with fries, etc. It’s good for your kids to have a detox from all that, frankly. You don’t need to live like this all year - just when your families get together.

She’s already trying to be considerate but good God it’s their vacation they’re allowed to do some things that maybe they aren’t at home!
Good Lord her kids have to suffer because their cousins aren’t allowed to live?

[Anonymous]

Wow! OK. I'm the OP. Just a few factual things:

1. It shouldn't matter, but I'm not a single mom; I've been happily married for 15 years.

2. My kids get a half-hour of screen time per day as a rule. They were chilling out before dinner playing a game on their iPads while we cooked, not gambling our life savings on a TikTok scam after staring bug-eyed at YouTube for 11 hours.

3. Fast-food is a treat. Kids were hungry. Stopped at a drive-thru. I do not believe occasional french fries will lead to obesity.

[Anonymous]

I am probably more like your sister, at least when my kids were younger, and I feel like she wants to have an intervention with me! Our parenting makes her crazy. Shrug. Luckily my kids don't beg to have what their cousins have for the most part. They just find it annoying that they don't see their cousins much and when they do, they seem glued to their iPads.

[Anonymous]

Also, BK onion rings are the bomb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow! OK. I'm the OP. Just a few factual things:

1. It shouldn't matter, but I'm not a single mom; I've been happily married for 15 years.

2. My kids get a half-hour of screen time per day as a rule. They were chilling out before dinner playing a game on their iPads while we cooked, not gambling our life savings on a TikTok scam after staring bug-eyed at YouTube for 11 hours.

3. Fast-food is a treat. Kids were hungry. Stopped at a drive-thru. I do not believe occasional french fries will lead to obesity.

You sound totally reasonable. Good luck with vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Why is this same sort of snark parroted here over and over? It's really not "helicopter" -- and by they you mean crazy and overbearing -- to not let you children eat garbage fast food and not let them become addicted to iPads/iPhones. It's actually HEALTHY and RESPONSIBLE. It's EASY to be a lazy ass parent who lets your kids be dullards who leave you alone while they're addicted to junk food, video games, iPads and whatever degeneracy and filth they can find online.

And then as a coping mechanism, you cling to the idea the kids raised better than yours will ACTUALLY turn out to be failures! I suspect you're the same trolls who obsessively post in the private school forum the same tired cliches about private school kids all being drug addicts.

Please point out where OP indicates that her children are addicted to junk food and screens, because I must have missed that part.

Moderation is key. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

Going to Burger King period SCREAMS low class addicted to fast food. Not Chick-fil-A or Panera or Sweetgreen...Burger King is basically dog food. Let alone while ON VACATION. OP also attempts to rationalize her kids being addicted to screens, it's all just really obvious.

Her sister doesn't sound crazy to me. Her sister sounds normal. Plus factor in the OP is likely exaggerating to sister's behavior to make her point and sway this message board.

More likely the sister is genuinely worried because her low class sister can't go a day without feeding her kids fast food. And maybe the sister detects other stunted behavior and maturity in her nieces and nephews.

I'm also guessing the sister is married and it sounds like OP is a single mom.

LOL

You are a piece of work, pp.

-Gourmet cook who has on occasion taken my kids to BK or McD’s. Especially if there is nothing else around for a fast bite when we are on vacation.

[Anonymous]

low class poster - you are trying way too hard. just decided to check out Burger King - I haven’t been there in 20 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I would be extra careful not to create envy in her poor children - so no pulling out of iPads, no walking in with fries, etc. It’s good for your kids to have a detox from all that, frankly. You don’t need to live like this all year - just when your families get together.

This. I get it that it is your vacation too, but save the screen time for your cottage and be a little more on top of the fast food without it being a big secret from the cousins. Or bad mouthing aunt to your kids.

But yes, the intervention is annoying. Any chance she really meant it instead of it being the passive aggressive judginess that it came across.