Just tell me straight- is the uninvited sibling you are bringing to the party going to take a favor?

[Anonymous]

Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a question: will the uninvited sibling be bringing a separate gift? If not, no goodie bag, and the parent in question doesn’t have a leg to stand on in expecting one. They’re the cheapo, not OP.

Point of the party should not be how many gifts the kid get. To even look at a child's birthday party like you suggest is really materialistic.

If you’re couching it in terms of the OP being cheap, then you are the one who has brought it to a materialistic level. You give a gift, you get a bag. No gift, no bag. Very simple.

Wrong. If a few extra children show up, you graciously offer them something--doesn't have to be the same as the invited guest but can be a substitute. OP can just make a batch of cookies and put them in gift bag. It's not a big deal. No bag, no gift? You are truly a tightwad and yes, materialistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

[Anonymous]

8 pages? Good grief but regular old cookies for the extras. Kids wont know the difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

This. Just tell them OP. Or else own your doormat self.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

This. Just tell them OP. Or else own your doormat self.

It’s not about being a doormat. I don’t need people talking smack about me if some people show up with siblings and some get told no.

[Anonymous]

OP, I completely understand your frustration! It is beyond rude to assume all of your children are invited to every party! However, if you know they are coming, I think the right thing to do is to have something for each kid. I don't think it has to be the same thing if you can't increase the cookie order at this point. Just run to target and get some small party bags and put some snacks and maybe some stickers or something in them. And then make sure you hand them out personally.

Going forward, I would specifically state on the invitation whether siblings are included. When my kids where still in preschool, siblings were frequently included, in which case the invitations said "siblings welcome." If they weren't included, most of the invitations stated "sorry but we can't accommodate siblings." If the invitation was silent, I always assumed they weren't included. I think it's better to just be clear on the invitation and save yourself the aggravation. If people think it's rude to state no siblings, oh well for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

This. Just tell them OP. Or else own your doormat self.

It’s not about being a doormat. I don’t need people talking smack about me if some people show up with siblings and some get told no.

Are you in high school? Talking smack?

I am at capacity so unfortunately, I cannot accommodate any additional siblings. Just communicate like an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes you'll need to either tell people no siblings or order more favors. Once a kid is there it takes a special kind of person to take a cookie out of their hands and say "you weren't invited, were you, Larlo's brother?"

I made a favor basket. I was wondering more along the lines of a parent saying “no that’s Larlo’s” and taking one large gourmet cookie. I wouldn’t personally be policing it.

How is the parent supposed to know they should decline? This is not a good strategy. You will end up with the last kids in the line (whether originally invited or not) without a favor, and it wouldn't be anyone's fault but yours. Since you said yes to the guest, give them a favor. Unless your secret revenge against these parents is to make their children cry and fight on the way home because one got the cookie and the other didn't (which, by the way, is not the fault of the kid who wasn't invited)?

They respond with two kids on the evite- I thought it would be fine and even ordered extras, but then everyone did it!

Next time specify on the invite that you cannot accommodate siblings at the party. This is not uncommon and understandable. Families who do not have alternate arrangements for the sibling can decline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

This. Just tell them OP. Or else own your doormat self.

It’s not about being a doormat. I don’t need people talking smack about me if some people show up with siblings and some get told no.

Are you in high school? Talking smack?

I am at capacity so unfortunately, I cannot accommodate any additional siblings. Just communicate like an adult.

People will still crab about it if they see other siblings there. I don’t need that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

This. Just tell them OP. Or else own your doormat self.

It’s not about being a doormat. I don’t need people talking smack about me if some people show up with siblings and some get told no.

Are you in high school? Talking smack?

I am at capacity so unfortunately, I cannot accommodate any additional siblings. Just communicate like an adult.

People will still crab about it if they see other siblings there. I don’t need that.

OMG either include siblings or don’t. This is not that hard.

[Anonymous]

Just buy another favor that's not customized and give to siblings. Place names on the customized favors, or just give them to the kids who don't have siblings there and give all the siblings a non customized favor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get this, OP. I ordered enough fancy cookies to send extra home for siblings that did not attend the party. Because I’m not cheap, 20 extra bucks is not that big a deal, and then parents don’t have to deal with fights or whining when they get home.

Hurrah for you? I’m not trying to be cheap, it’s a time thing. I just didn’t realize the phenomenon of “RSVP really late and tack on siblings”.

Then grow a spine. “So excited Larla can attend! Unfortunately, I am not able to accommodate siblings.”

This. Just tell them OP. Or else own your doormat self.

It’s not about being a doormat. I don’t need people talking smack about me if some people show up with siblings and some get told no.

Are you in high school? Talking smack?

I am at capacity so unfortunately, I cannot accommodate any additional siblings. Just communicate like an adult.

People will still crab about it if they see other siblings there. I don’t need that.

OMG either include siblings or don’t. This is not that hard.

OMG don’t bring uninvited kids to a party. It’s not that hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just eat the cookies myself and skip the party favors.

That’s what I would do too!