Just tell me straight- is the uninvited sibling you are bringing to the party going to take a favor?

[Anonymous]

In Chicago, where I live, the whole family is invited to parties unless they are drop off parties. I have never once seen it done any other way. Anyone can go to parties, and they are often focused on whole families, like grandparents and such too.

I cannot imagine a scenario where every child does not get a favor, like if they’re labeled for the ‘invited’ kid. In OP’s case I’d buy more cookies (not custom, but nice) and make the cookies be a mixed offering.

Imagine single parents. Parents where one partner is ill or out of town. Parents with an infant who is pretty easy to drag along. Be kind and inclusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is not a big deal and I'm always against siblings just coming. If you have an edible favor, just buy an extra box of cookies. YOU care that they are matching and "tasty" and special cookies, but kids won't.

This. Honestly the expensive custom decorated cookies taste like crap. Just get a tray of cookies from the bakery section that are decorated. Any grocery store bakery has them. And you don’t have to order advance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In Chicago, where I live, the whole family is invited to parties unless they are drop off parties. I have never once seen it done any other way. Anyone can go to parties, and they are often focused on whole families, like grandparents and such too.

I cannot imagine a scenario where every child does not get a favor, like if they’re labeled for the ‘invited’ kid. In OP’s case I’d buy more cookies (not custom, but nice) and make the cookies be a mixed offering.

Imagine single parents. Parents where one partner is ill or out of town. Parents with an infant who is pretty easy to drag along. Be kind and inclusive.

^^Must be mid-western thing b/c I'm from Chicago too and that's what I would do. Just be kind

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In Chicago, where I live, the whole family is invited to parties unless they are drop off parties. I have never once seen it done any other way. Anyone can go to parties, and they are often focused on whole families, like grandparents and such too.

I cannot imagine a scenario where every child does not get a favor, like if they’re labeled for the ‘invited’ kid. In OP’s case I’d buy more cookies (not custom, but nice) and make the cookies be a mixed offering.

Imagine single parents. Parents where one partner is ill or out of town. Parents with an infant who is pretty easy to drag along. Be kind and inclusive.

^^Must be mid-western thing b/c I'm from Chicago too and that's what I would do. Just be kind

Well here in DC people have small homes and do parties at venues that cap the amount of kids. So it’s not always possible to invite all the kids. I’m not paying to entertain your whole family at the expense of people we actually know and want to invite. Rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is not a big deal and I'm always against siblings just coming. If you have an edible favor, just buy an extra box of cookies. YOU care that they are matching and "tasty" and special cookies, but kids won't.

This. Honestly the expensive custom decorated cookies taste like crap. Just get a tray of cookies from the bakery section that are decorated. Any grocery store bakery has them. And you don’t have to order advance.

Ha really? My kid brought one home and that’s where I fit the idea. It was delicious. I ate it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry this is op- I’m just flummoxed. This is my one and only kid and first big birthday and I didn’t know people just RSVPd for siblings without checking. I doubled the pizza and cake but stupid me I had custom favors.

When people rsvp’d you had the chance to say “sorry this is just for the 3yr olds”, but you didn’t. If you didn’t say no siblings or “limited space, Larla’s classmates only” AND you didn’t shut it down when they rsvp’d, unfortunately you need more favors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is not a big deal and I'm always against siblings just coming. If you have an edible favor, just buy an extra box of cookies. YOU care that they are matching and "tasty" and special cookies, but kids won't.

This. Honestly the expensive custom decorated cookies taste like crap. Just get a tray of cookies from the bakery section that are decorated. Any grocery store bakery has them. And you don’t have to order advance.

Ha really? My kid brought one home and that’s where I fit the idea. It was delicious. I ate it!

I haven't read the whole thread- but isn't the obvious choice her just to not have favors! (or have them in the car, and only bring them out if you have enough no-shows that every kid can have one)?! no one will care if the party doesn't have favors, and you'll spare yourself the stress. I'm sure it will feel like wasted $, but next year you can do differently (either explicitly state no sibs, or do cheap favors you can give to all).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In Chicago, where I live, the whole family is invited to parties unless they are drop off parties. I have never once seen it done any other way. Anyone can go to parties, and they are often focused on whole families, like grandparents and such too.

I cannot imagine a scenario where every child does not get a favor, like if they’re labeled for the ‘invited’ kid. In OP’s case I’d buy more cookies (not custom, but nice) and make the cookies be a mixed offering.

Imagine single parents. Parents where one partner is ill or out of town. Parents with an infant who is pretty easy to drag along. Be kind and inclusive.

^^Must be mid-western thing b/c I'm from Chicago too and that's what I would do. Just be kind

Well here in DC people have small homes and do parties at venues that cap the amount of kids. So it’s not always possible to invite all the kids. I’m not paying to entertain your whole family at the expense of people we actually know and want to invite. Rude.

Understood. However, since this area is full of transplants from different cultures, the nice thing to do is specify on the invitation whether siblings are included. That eliminates any confusion.

Of course, the polite thing to do is ask if Larlo’s baby sister can tag along because you’re flying g solo that weekend, and IME most parents do this.

[Anonymous]

This drives me nuts and happens way too frequently. Do not bring siblings to parties unless you have extenuating circumstances and you ok it with the host in advance. There are A LOT of party venues that only allow for X number of children. Most hosts invite X number of children. We are not all loaded and can pay an extra $200 for you to bring extra kids.

I have learned my lesson and now make sure I limit RSVPs on the evite to only one child. This actually does not stop everyone as I’ve seen someone rsvp for one and then write in the comments that multiple kids are excited for the party. So now I also write in the party details that siblings are not invited.

It sucks OP, but now you know. Personally I would provide extra favors for the extra kids in your situation, but now you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This drives me nuts and happens way too frequently. Do not bring siblings to parties unless you have extenuating circumstances and you ok it with the host in advance. There are A LOT of party venues that only allow for X number of children. Most hosts invite X number of children. We are not all loaded and can pay an extra $200 for you to bring extra kids.

I have learned my lesson and now make sure I limit RSVPs on the evite to only one child. This actually does not stop everyone as I’ve seen someone rsvp for one and then write in the comments that multiple kids are excited for the party. So now I also write in the party details that siblings are not invited.

It sucks OP, but now you know. Personally I would provide extra favors for the extra kids in your situation, but now you know.

+1. Chalk it up to being a first-time birthday party planner and buy some extra cookies. Not worth stressing out over. Next time you’ll know better.

[Anonymous]

OP, if you know they are planning on coming (though initially uninvited), WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY, "NO" ??

[Anonymous]

OP, how many extra kids are showing up uninvited? I can't imagine it's a lot and thus should not be a huge inconvenience to you. You are making a bigger deal than it is.

[Anonymous]

I once forgot to disable the evite option to add additional guests and got 11 extra siblings added. It was unreal. This was in Arlington at a bounce place. Crazy!

But you need to be the bigger person and be gracious.

Wegman’s has beautiful/absolutely delicious iced cookies for $1-2 each. Do that. Then everyone gets a bakery decorated cookie with frosting. Just sticking Oreos in a bag for siblings really isn’t a “like” favor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In Chicago, where I live, the whole family is invited to parties unless they are drop off parties. I have never once seen it done any other way. Anyone can go to parties, and they are often focused on whole families, like grandparents and such too.

I cannot imagine a scenario where every child does not get a favor, like if they’re labeled for the ‘invited’ kid. In OP’s case I’d buy more cookies (not custom, but nice) and make the cookies be a mixed offering.

Imagine single parents. Parents where one partner is ill or out of town. Parents with an infant who is pretty easy to drag along. Be kind and inclusive.

^^Must be mid-western thing b/c I'm from Chicago too and that's what I would do. Just be kind

Well here in DC people have small homes and do parties at venues that cap the amount of kids. So it’s not always possible to invite all the kids. I’m not paying to entertain your whole family at the expense of people we actually know and want to invite. Rude.

I am also from the Midwest and don’t quite get this either. About half of the parties my kids have been to (or held) are at venues, but they are drop off parties. Why are you all expecting parebts to be there? Don’t the venues there have staff to help manage the kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is not a big deal and I'm always against siblings just coming. If you have an edible favor, just buy an extra box of cookies. YOU care that they are matching and "tasty" and special cookies, but kids won't.

This. Honestly the expensive custom decorated cookies taste like crap. Just get a tray of cookies from the bakery section that are decorated. Any grocery store bakery has them. And you don’t have to order advance.

Ha really? My kid brought one home and that’s where I fit the idea. It was delicious. I ate it!

I know that what you thought. Hence the bolded.