Do men regret their divorces?

[Anonymous]

Most guys I know who initiated their divorces already had someone waiting and instantly remarried. Just replacing one warm body with another. So I'm guessing no regrets.

I'm a woman btw.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The vast majority of guys in the world can't live without a woman.

And the vast majority of women in the world can't live without a man. So your point is... ?

Actually, once they stop wanting kids, they largely want to be left alone.

Yeah right that's why countless single moms are on dating sites desperately trying to find a man who won't mind their awful baggage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The vast majority of guys in the world can't live without a woman.

And the vast majority of women in the world can't live without a man. So your point is... ?

Actually, once they stop wanting kids, they largely want to be left alone.

Yeah right that's why countless single moms are on dating sites desperately trying to find a man who won't mind their awful baggage.

They're on dating sites.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The vast majority of guys in the world can't live without a woman.

And the vast majority of women in the world can't live without a man. So your point is... ?

Actually, once they stop wanting kids, they largely want to be left alone.

Yeah right that's why countless single moms are on dating sites desperately trying to find a man who won't mind their awful baggage.

That's because they need another paycheck, and the desperate men hope to have more sex. After a few years it becomes wash, rinse, repeat much like the first marriage. Or just a different set of problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The vast majority of guys in the world can't live without a woman.

And the vast majority of women in the world can't live without a man. So your point is... ?

Actually, once they stop wanting kids, they largely want to be left alone.

Yeah right that's why countless single moms are on dating sites desperately trying to find a man who won't mind their awful baggage.

That's because they need another paycheck, and the desperate men hope to have more sex. After a few years it becomes wash, rinse, repeat much like the first marriage. Or just a different set of problems.

Nah, not all single moms. I date because i generally like the company of a man. Most don't make more than me, so thats not a factor. BTW, I love sex.

[Anonymous]

You love sex? Wow! That’s new to hear on DCUM where it seems just another chore!

[Anonymous]

I’ve noticed that only three actual men have answered the OP’s question and all three were mrn who escspedsbusive relationdhips. I didn’t see anyone say they divorced their wives on a whim. I do have an acquaintance whose wife asked for divorce after 17 years of marriage. He said he was grateful because it was evident the marriage was on life support. He and she are in s much happier place now.

[Anonymous]

My male cousin is divorced and his behavior has gotten very strange since his divorce. Just one example is skipping family holidays when he had never done that before. But the marriage lasted less than a year (despite living together for years prior to the wedding) and no one really knows the whole story, so he may just regret marrying her to begin with.

[Anonymous]

My brother regrets. He cheated, his X-wife found out and kicked him out. Almost every time they meet - because of the kids he cries - its been 3 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most guys I know who initiated their divorces already had someone waiting and instantly remarried. Just replacing one warm body with another. So I'm guessing no regrets.

I'm a woman btw.

Five male friends, and me. All of us initiated, none had a new woman waiting. Of the five, 3 are re-married, one is in a 4+ year relationship, one had been divorced for 1.5 years and has yet to go on a date, and then there is me: divorced a long time, no relationships, can't get over the ex, but still relieved to be away from her and no regrets about the divorce. Even if I suffer heartache for the rest of my life, I won't regret the divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Statistically, men who divorce end up with women identical to or similar to the women they married in the first place. They repeat the same issues over and over because they refuse to do the work to address their own issues or understand why they are drawn to certain women.

Statistically, men who divorce end up with second wives who are on average 8 years younger.

and likely the same or identical in personality to the first wife - which is why most second marriages end in divorce.

No, not in my experience. All my divorced male friends who remarried are with the exact opposite (looks, and personality) from their exes. One of those friends is getting close to his 25th anniversary with wife #2, and one is at his 15th anniversary with wife #2. 100 percent of these friends report relationship #2 is night-and-day better.

Speaking just for myself, it has amazed me how kind my girlfriend is. She is the exact opposite from my ex-wife. My new love never has a tantrum, never gaslights, never does guilt trips, never calls me names, never uses sex as a weapon, never nags, and she makes as much as me and owns her own house and investment property. Plus she is younger and thinner than the ex and has family money.

I think I'm going to write a book about divorced men, their miserable lives with their shrews, and their happily ever after lives after divorce.

Ha! Give it a couple years, you'll be calling her a shrew, too.

No, never, I promise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Statistically, men who divorce end up with women identical to or similar to the women they married in the first place. They repeat the same issues over and over because they refuse to do the work to address their own issues or understand why they are drawn to certain women.

Statistically, men who divorce end up with second wives who are on average 8 years younger.

and likely the same or identical in personality to the first wife - which is why most second marriages end in divorce.

No, not in my experience. All my divorced male friends who remarried are with the exact opposite (looks, and personality) from their exes. One of those friends is getting close to his 25th anniversary with wife #2, and one is at his 15th anniversary with wife #2. 100 percent of these friends report relationship #2 is night-and-day better.

Speaking just for myself, it has amazed me how kind my girlfriend is. She is the exact opposite from my ex-wife. My new love never has a tantrum, never gaslights, never does guilt trips, never calls me names, never uses sex as a weapon, never nags, and she makes as much as me and owns her own house and investment property. Plus she is younger and thinner than the ex and has family money.

I think I'm going to write a book about divorced men, their miserable lives with their shrews, and their happily ever after lives after divorce.

Ha! Give it a couple years, you'll be calling her a shrew, too.

Lol right? All of a sudden, his wonderful, rich, and beautiful girlfriend will turn into a mean, poor bitch. The bitter guys on this thread don’t seem to realize that they subconsciously attracted nasty bitches the last time because they themselves are miserable losers. Shit attracts shit. And I highly doubt their BS that they found an absolute winner the next time, unless they did some serious therapy and behavior modification.

I'm not bitter and ex didn't start out as a nasty bitch. I'm quite successful at everything, far from being a loser, but also a classic nice guy. So when she went bat-crazy bitch, I wasn't an asshole who could put her back down. I just tried being nicer. I'm getting better, though. That won't happen again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok.... My husband left me and the kids. Walked out the door for his mistress. He told me he regrets it. He doesn't cry himself to sleep every night (I don't think), he made peace (to some degree?) with the fact he pretty much f-ed up his life. We are friends.

Another story from a woman. I wonder what he would tell me if I met him in a bar.

You do realize that the story he tells you at the bar may not be the truth either, right? Most people don't like to admit when they have made a mistake, so they put on a happy front.

My ex told me on numerous occasions that he felt like our divorce was a mistake and that he wanted to get back together-- he cheated and he filed for the divorce. He never got back on his feet after the divorce (we had a 50/50 split so there was no child support) and he died from heart disease exactly two years after we split. He was only 44 at the time of his death.

I thrived after the divorce and would have never gone back to him.

Same thing with my SIL. Her husband stupidly left her at age 50 for another woman. The other woman was broke having gone through bankruptcy and a divorce with her husband. I don't think SIL's husband researched her. Nasty divorce. He wanted the new tart and the home that was paid off. Judge gave her the home since she had the kids, and took less of the retirement. Home really appreciated. He and the new woman almost had to start over. Not a good age to do that. The OW ended up dying of a heart valve problem, and he died 3 years after that. He also tried to get back with SIL, but she refused his calls. Never talked to him after the divorce. He wasn't even invited to the sons wedding.

A lot of people don't factor in health problems, or changes in the job market etc. There's a reason 2nd marriages fail at a greater rate.

Wow, your SIL did a fantastic job alienating the children so that they didn't even invite their own father to the wedding.

lol He was grown fyi. The ex cheater alienated many by his actions.

So kids unlearn the alienation when they turn 18?

[Anonymous]

Reading through this thread, it's not the men who are bitter, but the women. The women on DCUM think they are somehow God's gift to men - perfect bodies that can wear yoga pants (that's the white women anyway), have multiple degrees or are partners in law firms and are the best moms on the face of the planet and any many that would divorce such a woman is obviously a loser.

Sorry to break it to you ladies, but if you can't be a loving and respectful wife to your husband, he will leave. No man (or woman for that matter) needs to spend their life with someone who makes them miserable.

[Anonymous]

And if you are bitter, please take a look in the mirror.