Is it bad form to bring your kids to back to school night?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

People will give you the evil eye - ignore them. As long as your child is not making noise / being disruptive it is not an issue.

I have never known a parent who could guarantee that their child would not make noise in a public setting.

Nobody can guarantee that anybody won't make noise. I can't guarantee that I won't make noise. So what?

[Anonymous]

Why have BTSN at all? What a PITA. Just email a Power Point presentation home to everyone. Print for those with no email.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why have BTSN at all? What a PITA. Just email a Power Point presentation home to everyone. Print for those with no email.

It's actually really helpful. It's a good opportunity to meet the teacher, see the classroom, Q&A, and get a quick 411 on what to expect in the upcoming school year.

You don't seem to understand the importance of personal interaction, do you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

I've been to lots of BTSNs. There were kids at all of them. Even when the school provided child care, people still brought babies. So clearly it's possible to do it that way.

Who paid for that???? That's certainly not a public school thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why have BTSN at all? What a PITA. Just email a Power Point presentation home to everyone. Print for those with no email.

It's actually really helpful. It's a good opportunity to meet the teacher, see the classroom, Q&A, and get a quick 411 on what to expect in the upcoming school year.

You don't seem to understand the importance of personal interaction, do you?

The quick 411 is not rocket science. And I have open house and all year to personally interact with the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

Np here. No, I haven't. This is my oldest's first year in school (prek) and I have lived a life that until now has been back to school night free. (As an adult. I have no recollection of what they may have been like as a kid.) I assumed it was for the whole family. The school gave no guidance as far as I could tell and it just seemed like one more thing. I had planned on the entire family going. My husband was the one who brought up the idea that it was probably for parents only and we checked with some veteran parents in our dd's class. Don't worry- Grandma lives close and can watch the kids, but I would like to think that if we showed up with two kids, people would be kind to parents new to this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

Np here. No, I haven't. This is my oldest's first year in school (prek) and I have lived a life that until now has been back to school night free. (As an adult. I have no recollection of what they may have been like as a kid.) I assumed it was for the whole family. The school gave no guidance as far as I could tell and it just seemed like one more thing. I had planned on the entire family going. My husband was the one who brought up the idea that it was probably for parents only and we checked with some veteran parents in our dd's class. Don't worry- Grandma lives close and can watch the kids, but I would like to think that if we showed up with two kids, people would be kind to parents new to this.

I think most people would be kind. Except for the DCUM parents (and apparently at least 1 nutty teacher) that have anger issues and vent on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

People will give you the evil eye - ignore them. As long as your child is not making noise / being disruptive it is not an issue.

I have never known a parent who could guarantee that their child would not make noise in a public setting.

Nobody can guarantee that anybody won't make noise. I can't guarantee that I won't make noise. So what?

So, they asked you not to bring your child, that's what.

If you don't bother to follow the rules, why should your child be expected to follow your rules?

I bet if someone cut in line in front of you, ie, didn't follow the "line" rule, you'd be pissed, right? You'd think the person was rude and selfish, right? This is what we think of you, too. But of course, rules don't apply to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

Np here. No, I haven't. This is my oldest's first year in school (prek) and I have lived a life that until now has been back to school night free. (As an adult. I have no recollection of what they may have been like as a kid.) I assumed it was for the whole family. The school gave no guidance as far as I could tell and it just seemed like one more thing. I had planned on the entire family going. My husband was the one who brought up the idea that it was probably for parents only and we checked with some veteran parents in our dd's class. Don't worry- Grandma lives close and can watch the kids, but I would like to think that if we showed up with two kids, people would be kind to parents new to this.

I think most people would be kind. Except for the DCUM parents (and apparently at least 1 nutty teacher) that have anger issues and vent on DCUM.

Most people would "tolerate" your child, but inwardly think, "ffs, leave your kids at home so I can hear the teacher and not let it be a waste of my time".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

Np here. No, I haven't. This is my oldest's first year in school (prek) and I have lived a life that until now has been back to school night free. (As an adult. I have no recollection of what they may have been like as a kid.) I assumed it was for the whole family. The school gave no guidance as far as I could tell and it just seemed like one more thing. I had planned on the entire family going. My husband was the one who brought up the idea that it was probably for parents only and we checked with some veteran parents in our dd's class. Don't worry- Grandma lives close and can watch the kids, but I would like to think that if we showed up with two kids, people would be kind to parents new to this.

I think most people would be kind. Except for the DCUM parents (and apparently at least 1 nutty teacher) that have anger issues and vent on DCUM.

Most people would "tolerate" your child, but inwardly think, "ffs, leave your kids at home so I can hear the teacher and not let it be a waste of my time".

If you're kid was being loud/unruly. Otherwise, only those with their undies already twisted in a wad would care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

I've been to lots of BTSNs. There were kids at all of them. Even when the school provided child care, people still brought babies. So clearly it's possible to do it that way.

Who paid for that???? That's certainly not a public school thing.

I'm the PP you're responding to. Yes, it was a public school thing, through the PTA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

People will give you the evil eye - ignore them. As long as your child is not making noise / being disruptive it is not an issue.

I have never known a parent who could guarantee that their child would not make noise in a public setting.

Nobody can guarantee that anybody won't make noise. I can't guarantee that I won't make noise. So what?

So, they asked you not to bring your child, that's what.

If you don't bother to follow the rules, why should your child be expected to follow your rules?

I bet if someone cut in line in front of you, ie, didn't follow the "line" rule, you'd be pissed, right? You'd think the person was rude and selfish, right? This is what we think of you, too. But of course, rules don't apply to you.

If it comes to a choice of going to back-to-school night with your children, or staying home, then I want you to choose going to back-to-school-night with your children. And I would hope that the school would want you to choose that too. Why does it bother you so much if other people bring their children and the children aren't disruptive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the heck is back to school night considered an adult-only event in the first place? When I was a kid, it was for the whole family, and it was fine.

Because it's a time for the teachers to give a little speech to ALL of the parents, and it's hard to hear them when kids are making noise.

When you were a kid you also probably didn't have IEPs for SN kids. Why not go back to that, too.

Yes to above. Adding to that is that your kids are a distraction AND it's super crowded so if you made BTSN a family event it would be even more crowded.

Seriousky, have you never been to a BTSN??? A family event...gimme a break! This isn't the PTA fall festival fundraiser, it's BTSN.

Np here. No, I haven't. This is my oldest's first year in school (prek) and I have lived a life that until now has been back to school night free. (As an adult. I have no recollection of what they may have been like as a kid.) I assumed it was for the whole family. The school gave no guidance as far as I could tell and it just seemed like one more thing. I had planned on the entire family going. My husband was the one who brought up the idea that it was probably for parents only and we checked with some veteran parents in our dd's class. Don't worry- Grandma lives close and can watch the kids, but I would like to think that if we showed up with two kids, people would be kind to parents new to this.

They often talk about things that kids should not hear:
- the actual day sex Ed starts (fourth grade)
- how discipline may work (at one btsn the teacher explained she has a point system where the kids work towards a pizza party. She had only a single class earn two in a year but all will earn one for field day. The kids aren't to know that earning that one is a definite)
- teacher in fifth grade discussed how math groups are based on protests and kids are placed in groups based on how well they did but they did NOT want the kids to know which group meant what.
- teacher in second had sign up for mystery reader there for parents to sign up for it right then

This is not a family event. This is to provide information between the adults (teachers, parents, specialists, some admin, etc). That's it.

[Anonymous]

To clarify, they ask the kids not be told when sex Ed is starting because they want the kids to hear about in the timing of it at home privately from parents rather than just stated blatantly at btsn. (Former teacher here). It is in the flyer we send home about it too

[Anonymous]

A fourth grader could sit at home for an hour. Or they could sit quietly in the hall. Or- THEY COULD EVEN LEARN THE DATE of the start of sex Ed. None of these things are big deals.