Did I screw this mom over?

[Anonymous]

I am curious what state this is. In MD it is illegal to run a food business like this out if your home. In VA you can in some cases, but if course have to be licensed and inspected.

If the baker is a true business expecting to be paid she should have been more up front. peopke keep commenting about the cheap price. Likely bc she isn't paying the legitimate overhead that a real bakery warrants. Or taxes.

Op went above and beyond here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I got married, a friend starting a flower business offered to do the flowers and I thought we agreed on the price in advance but kept asking for it in writing. All sorts of things happened, and it became clear she wasn't thinking through the business side of her skill. If the cake pop person is a close enough acquaintance I'd consider telling her that it wasn't clear whether she was doing this as an opportunity to advertise / drum up business or as a paid gig. It could help her run her business even better in the future. That said, glad you paid her OP!!

Good advice here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think I should be ok. I messaged her that I pay paled her the payment and I really appreciated her hard work and she said... "thank you so much, look forward to future parties. " So i don't think she will be insulted I paid her. Looking back it was silly for me to think otherwise.

OP I think you did the right thing, but it should be a lesson learned. She did not act in the least bit professional. It is like one of those creepy sales parties and the person says "why don't you take it home?" It is a slick (and underhanded) way of making you use her business and pay for it. She should not have assumed that you knew it was a business -- because people bring food gifts over all the time for parties. Yes, she is starting a "business" but she is going about it the wrong way. "I'll bring the birthday cake! I can make that for you!" is just bizarre. Also, she opened the door to lots of talk behind your back if you didn't pay her, because others would naturally assume that she told you it was a catering job. manipulative. Those would be the last cake pops I would ever buy from her. Or anything else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Her prices are kind of high (dollar a pop!) would you pay her "list" prices or just offer her a set amount of money?

You pay her what her website prices are. PERIOD. I hate to be an ass, but seriously. Who makes these kinds of assumptions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:$1 a pop? I'd love to know the baker mom's FB page!

+1

Please share!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:pay her this isn't a hippie commune

Haha. Well put. I couldn't agree more.

[Anonymous]

I had a similar business going for a while - she should have been clearer. "I make cake pops. Let me know if you'd like me to bring some to Larla's party" OR "I have a cake pop business. Here's my card if you want to check out the designs and order some". In the beginning I just brought them everywhere - enough for the whole daycare, every birthday party, every holiday... I never asked anyone for money, just attached the business info. After a while I would get calls and emails placing orders, which obviously I had a price list and charged for. But I would never expect a dime from someone without discussing rates or even letting them view designs to discuss details or colors or designs.

You did a nice thing by paying her, but she should have been clearer about whether she was looking for business or experience. If she was looking for experience, she should have told you that too, and if you asked the cost she could have just said "this one's on me, but if anyone asks about the pops be sure to send them to my business page".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am curious what state this is. In MD it is illegal to run a food business like this out if your home. In VA you can in some cases, but if course have to be licensed and inspected.

If the baker is a true business expecting to be paid she should have been more up front. peopke keep commenting about the cheap price. Likely bc she isn't paying the legitimate overhead that a real bakery warrants. Or taxes.

Op went above and beyond here.

Not necessarily.

[Anonymous]

She sounds like a terrible business woman.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like this is settled, but I still wanted to chime in. My husband runs a business out of his home and routinely gets into these kind of nebulous arrangements with friends. I always tell him you've got to make it clear that you're in business. Yes, it's awkward, but as a business person doing business, you've got to tell people what you charge. If you want to give a friend a deep discount, then you'd say "I run a little side business with this, here's my website, but let's talk - I will charge you cost because we're friends and if you'd like them, I always appreciate word of mouth referrals!"

On the other hand, it is rude to assume that just because someone does this work, that they'd be glad to do it for you for free. Still, the way OP put it, it was never even mentioned that this was a business! My husband's situation is a little bit different because people clearly know he runs a business - it's a very specific thing that he does. Even so, you would't believe the people who think he's going to do it for free.

A good friend of mine runs a cake business and she made my wedding cake gratis, but told me that she was going to do that for me as my wedding gift.

My husband's business situation is that he ends up doing things for people without discussing the rates first, and feels they should know what he charges and shouldn't enter into things without looking into it. That makes me crazy! You need to be clear up front that you're in business, if you want to do business. And if it's awkward at first, it won't be after you develop your own style going into it.

After a few thousand dollars in losses, my DH has learned this lesson and now says up front, here is what I charge per hour - you get the friends discount of X. If people can't afford it, and plenty say they can't, and he really wants to do the project, he might cut them another deal. But at least that way every one knows going into it.

[Anonymous]

"He can surely present a bill for his services. After all gentlemen, we are not communists!" (chuckle around room)

[Anonymous]

I haven't waded through 9 pages, but this seems to be ridiculously weighted towards Cake Pop mom and against OP. If Cake Pop mom does this as a business, she should've made clear that she would be glad to do the party and let OP know her rates. OP should have offered to pay at the outset- as in, "you don't have to go to all that trouble to make themed cake pops for Larlo's party, can I offer you something for them," but I think it is silly for her to have to figure out by looking on the internet that Cake Pop mom has a "business" and then send her a check with no invoice. Both parties are being unreasonable, but I think the onus is on the business owner to get herself paid if that's what she expects.

[Anonymous]

OP, I agree with others that you should ask how much you owe. That being said, the lady should have been upfront from the beginning that this is a business! Why on earth would she not advertise it as such?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here! Yikes I was totally in the wrong! I pay paled her the exact amount I owed her according to her list prices.

You had no idea this was a business - the baker is at fault too. I think ppl are being way too hard on OP. OP graciously admitted she was wrong without being defensive and paid. I think she's a class act.

The baker is not "at fault", because she never asked for payment. OP found out she ran a business, and paid accordingly because that's the right thing to do. Don't see how the baker did anything wrong at all.

The baker did not make it clear that she is running a business and never asked for payment. If OP had never looked her up, how was she to know this person expected to get paid? Weird way to run a business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am curious what state this is. In MD it is illegal to run a food business like this out if your home. In VA you can in some cases, but if course have to be licensed and inspected.

If the baker is a true business expecting to be paid she should have been more up front. peopke keep commenting about the cheap price. Likely bc she isn't paying the legitimate overhead that a real bakery warrants. Or taxes.

Op went above and beyond here.

Not necessarily.

If she isn't on a farm with an associated cottage food exemption, yes. It is. 100 %.

Where would it be legal in md?