Any colleges you wouldn't allow your kid to go to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any school that focuses on Greek Life...I don't like sororities or fraternities.

This.

Plus any school that takes sports way too seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love the way some posters are saying they "won't allow" certain schools. You know how I can tell you don't have college kids?

We have one who has graduated, three in college now, one in high school. My four oldest chose very different schools. Because we are the ones paying, of course we had some say in where they decided to go. But the only thing we said was that we would pay the equivalent of in-state tuition. Anything extra would have to be scholarships or other aid. Other that that, we let them make the decision.

These are ADULTS. You need to put aside your own prejudices (Really? No schools anywhere in the South? How stupid do you have to be to come up with something like that) and your own college experiences (The poster who hates Greek life was so obviously shut out of every good sorority) and let your adult children make their own decisions.

No wonder so many of you have kids on medication and in therapy.

I have three adult children all done with college and beyond.

We made it clear to them when they were in high school that we had the right to veto any school that we thought was not suitable for them. So with our help a short list of schools was drawn up in which they were heavily involved. They were fine with it.

Why did we do this? Easy, we were paying for their college and as long as it was on our dime we had a say - not that we would decide the school they would go to but we would decide which school they would NOT go to.

When it came to grad school, law school, med school, they made the decision partly because they were funding most of the cost and also because they were really mature enough to make a decision. You may think that 18 year olds can make informed decisions and some can - but many cannot and it is the role of the parents to guide them and if we are paying for it to have a decisive say on what is not acceptable.

BTW, none of my kids are or have been on medication or therapy.

What on earth does this have to do with the topic at hand?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:University of Maryland any campus. Awful.

My DS attend University of Maryland, primarily because I wanted him to live at home. He just turned 15 in June so it seemed reasonable.

say what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:University of Maryland any campus. Awful.

My DS attend University of Maryland, primarily because I wanted him to live at home. He just turned 15 in June so it seemed reasonable.

say what?

Finished high school early so started college early. Not too hard to figure out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Radford... Because, why bother?

Because it's affordable, pretty (according to some posters here), and some of its programs are very good. And I suspect it would provide a view of the world you don't get inside the Beltway.

Anyway, the two things that would make me nudge my kids away from a college or university are a dominant Greek presence and a large percentage of classes taught by adjuncts (I don't mind graduate students as instructors, because their crappy pay is a temporary problem for them, but adjuncts are the house elves of academia).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:University of Maryland any campus. Awful.

My DS attend University of Maryland, primarily because I wanted him to live at home. He just turned 15 in June so it seemed reasonable.

say what?

Finished high school early so started college early. Not too hard to figure out.

Another Sheldon Cooper.

[Anonymous]

I dropped out of college. I felt pressured to attend my dad's alma mater and it was not the right fit for me, triggering a chain of bad choices. I know I squandered a great educational and social opportunity, but of course I couldn't see that at the time. We've told our kids that we will support them as much as possible where touring and applying to schools is concerned, but that ultimately it's their choice where they go. Honestly, I'd rather have my kid happily attending NOVA and transferring to a state school than failing miserably at the school we told him he should attend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Radford... Because, why bother?

Because it's affordable, pretty (according to some posters here), and some of its programs are very good. And I suspect it would provide a view of the world you don't get inside the Beltway.

Anyway, the two things that would make me nudge my kids away from a college or university are a dominant Greek presence and a large percentage of classes taught by adjuncts (I don't mind graduate students as instructors, because their crappy pay is a temporary problem for them, but adjuncts are the house elves of academia).

Isn't that all large universities these days? Totally feudal/exploitative.

[Anonymous]

I cannot think of any schools I'd forbid my child attending, although I'd be reluctant to pay for a school that wasn't accredited or super ideological like Bob Jones, Liberty or Patrick Henry. Other than that I'd want my child to make their own decision about the best college for them.

[Anonymous]

I would not release the 529 funds for Santa Cruz, Evergreen State, Oberlin or anywhere else they would likely go up in smoke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love the way some posters are saying they "won't allow" certain schools. You know how I can tell you don't have college kids?

We have one who has graduated, three in college now, one in high school. My four oldest chose very different schools. Because we are the ones paying, of course we had some say in where they decided to go. But the only thing we said was that we would pay the equivalent of in-state tuition. Anything extra would have to be scholarships or other aid. Other that that, we let them make the decision.

These are ADULTS. You need to put aside your own prejudices (Really? No schools anywhere in the South? How stupid do you have to be to come up with something like that) and your own college experiences (The poster who hates Greek life was so obviously shut out of every good sorority) and let your adult children make their own decisions.

No wonder so many of you have kids on medication and in therapy.

I have three adult children all done with college and beyond.

We made it clear to them when they were in high school that we had the right to veto any school that we thought was not suitable for them. So with our help a short list of schools was drawn up in which they were heavily involved. They were fine with it.

Why did we do this? Easy, we were paying for their college and as long as it was on our dime we had a say - not that we would decide the school they would go to but we would decide which school they would NOT go to.

When it came to grad school, law school, med school, they made the decision partly because they were funding most of the cost and also because they were really mature enough to make a decision. You may think that 18 year olds can make informed decisions and some can - but many cannot and it is the role of the parents to guide them and if we are paying for it to have a decisive say on what is not acceptable.

BTW, none of my kids are or have been on medication or therapy.

What on earth does this have to do with the topic at hand?

PP's pretty sure that kids with LDs just need a swift kick in the ass from their parents to get better. Letting kids choose their college is just a symptom of lax parenting that leads to therapy and medication.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love the way some posters are saying they "won't allow" certain schools. You know how I can tell you don't have college kids?

We have one who has graduated, three in college now, one in high school. My four oldest chose very different schools. Because we are the ones paying, of course we had some say in where they decided to go. But the only thing we said was that we would pay the equivalent of in-state tuition. Anything extra would have to be scholarships or other aid. Other that that, we let them make the decision.

These are ADULTS. You need to put aside your own prejudices (Really? No schools anywhere in the South? How stupid do you have to be to come up with something like that) and your own college experiences (The poster who hates Greek life was so obviously shut out of every good sorority) and let your adult children make their own decisions.

No wonder so many of you have kids on medication and in therapy.

I'm in a sorority and am a sorority advisor. I have my reservations about Greek life on some campuses -- Texas, Dartmouth, and Indiana spring to mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love the way some posters are saying they "won't allow" certain schools. You know how I can tell you don't have college kids?

We have one who has graduated, three in college now, one in high school. My four oldest chose very different schools. Because we are the ones paying, of course we had some say in where they decided to go. But the only thing we said was that we would pay the equivalent of in-state tuition. Anything extra would have to be scholarships or other aid. Other that that, we let them make the decision.

These are ADULTS. You need to put aside your own prejudices (Really? No schools anywhere in the South? How stupid do you have to be to come up with something like that) and your own college experiences (The poster who hates Greek life was so obviously shut out of every good sorority) and let your adult children make their own decisions.

No wonder so many of you have kids on medication and in therapy.

I have three adult children all done with college and beyond.

We made it clear to them when they were in high school that we had the right to veto any school that we thought was not suitable for them. So with our help a short list of schools was drawn up in which they were heavily involved. They were fine with it.

Why did we do this? Easy, we were paying for their college and as long as it was on our dime we had a say - not that we would decide the school they would go to but we would decide which school they would NOT go to.

When it came to grad school, law school, med school, they made the decision partly because they were funding most of the cost and also because they were really mature enough to make a decision. You may think that 18 year olds can make informed decisions and some can - but many cannot and it is the role of the parents to guide them and if we are paying for it to have a decisive say on what is not acceptable.

BTW, none of my kids are or have been on medication or therapy.

What on earth does this have to do with the topic at hand?

Not that poster, but I interpreted her last line as a preemptive strike against someone claiming that her approach is too controlling and going to "ruin her kids" -- an accusation I see frequently on these boards against parents who are highly involved and/or strict with older kids.

FWIW, I pretty much agree with this approach for most kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I cannot think of any schools I'd forbid my child attending, although I'd be reluctant to pay for a school that wasn't accredited or super ideological like Bob Jones, Liberty or Patrick Henry. Other than that I'd want my child to make their own decision about the best college for them.

Me too.

[Anonymous]

UVA