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To the OP,
By telling your neighbors, you are enabling them to make an informed choice. They may choose to divorce, or they may choose to stay and forgive - but it's their choice. By not telling your neighbors you are making the decision for them - to stay. What all those posters commenting to MYOB know and aren't telling you is that you have something more important to your neighbors than knowledge of the affair. You have photographic evidence. In states like VA, divorce on the grounds of adultery is a game changer. It can impact important matters such as spousal support, equitable distribution, and child custody. |
| Even more reason for the OP to stay quiet. These two people while obviously not great spouses, I'd hope they are good parents. If this photo can effect custody, that's not blood id want on my hands. |
| I'm in the MYOB camp. Take a long look inside yourself, OP, and question hard your motivations for wanting to tell. Is it really because you want to help the non-cheating spouses and it's weighing on your conscience, or is it because you bought an expensive house and you feel the cheating neighbors are ruining what you envisioned your idyllic neighborhood to be? |
| MYOB. Seriously. |
| What about sending photo to the cheating spouses? They have the opportunity to come clean |
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I like that idea^
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| So you live in a nice neighborhood. I'll assume that the homes were expensive. In order to afford these homes I'll assume that most people in the neighborhood are well educated. So you have a well educated pregnant woman who husband is cheating on her in a not so subtle way, and you think she doesn't know? Like the OP said previously, you don't know what goes on behind closed doors . You don't know what either of those marriages look like from the inside and you don't know exactly how much the wife already knows and is dealing with. I would not get involved. This has the potential to get very messy and even if what ever note you send to the pregnant wife doesn't have your name on it. I am sure that this woman will be able to figure it out. |
| Maybe send the guilty parties a warning? Let them hang themselves. |
+100! |
| Confront the cheaters |
| Op isn't posting anymore but as a np, I don't get all the hate being spewed. She has a dilemma. It's valid. She's torn up because she can see herself in the pregnant lady's shoes. I get it. I would want someone to tell me. It is humiliating that the whole block knows. But that's not relevant to the question of Myob unless she knows for certain what the pregnant lady's position is on wanting to know. Whether I told would depend on the closeness of my friendship. I would be MYOB with any of my neighbors because I am not close. But I could never keep a secret like that from a best friend who had previously told me she'd want to know. |
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OP could confront the lady cheater, OP's husband could confront the man and say: "This is extremely embarrassing for me to say, but are you aware that other people can see the two of you? This is none of my business, I don't want it to be my business. Please - I don't want to see that."
No - you can't just drop an anonymous bomb in the pregnant lady's lap. |
| We'll if the whole block knows, it's gonna come out. MYOB, pop some popcorn and enjoy the show |
I totally get her point with these remarks. She just moved to her dream house, and was looking forward to her new stage in her life, new neighbors, Bla, bla, bla..... And who really wants this drama in their neighborhood. That's how I read it. It is not about pretentiousness. |
Cannot believe it! What a looser! Where is your self esteem! I am sure he cheated on you. Why wouldn't he? Nothing to loose there. He know you will stick around no matter what. And guess what.... He will do it again. Good luck to you. You will need it. |