Special Needs Child Bully on Soccer Team

[Anonymous]

A reasonably astute parent can figure it out with observation.

NO they can't. My friend had her son tested because he was pushing people on the play ground and at sports practice and she was made to feel she was in DENIAL. She took him out of sports.

The testing came back nothing.

It's bizarre, because she has 3 kids, all raised in the same house, same parents, same rules.

One pushes.

He no longer pushes. See how that happens. Ends up he was having a delayed reaction (6 month delay - lasted about 6 months) to the death of his grandmother (hindsight is 20/20).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP may have a legitimate problem in there somewhere but it is obscured by the assumption she is making that aggressive kid = special needs. And then compounding it by coming here and essentially saying "hey parents of kids with special needs, one of your bullying children is misbehaving so tell me how to deal with this." Its really insulting and thats why most of us can't even get to the kernel of a legitimate issue in there.

This is where you went wrong, OP:

1. You are playing amateur diagnostician. It is incredibly presumptuous to do this. Most of us have had serious issues with the professionals in our DC's lives, like teachers and such, jumping in where they don't belong. You aren't even a professional.

2. The assumption that aggressive kid equals special needs. Some of our kids do have impulse control issues but there is far from a one to one correlation there. I know my kids -- DC 1 with ADHD, and DC 2 with AS and ADHD -- are the gentlest kids you could meet.

3. Then you come here and ask us to help you, compounding problems one and two. As i wrote, you are sending the message that you see us as parents of kids who are little monsters.

4. I have no idea idea whether you are even credible when it comes to this other mother. You are definitely stirring the kettle here by kicking up more drama than the situation entails.

Just go to general parenting.

This is where you went wrong, PP:

1. You think that other parents are not capable of watching from the sidelines and determining what constitutes the range of normal kid behaviors vs. a child or children whose behaviors are clearly out of the norm. I know you want to think all SN kids just blend in seamlessly. This doesn't always happen. A reasonably astute parent can figure it out with observation.

2. Impulse control goes hand in had with physical aggression in young children. It's a fair assumption whether you want it to be or not.

3. You come here and pretend that a SN child may not actually be on a soccer team.

4. I have not idea if you are even credible.

This makes no sense. First Of all, behavior outside of the norm is not a diagnosis. It can indicate anything and nothing. That's why experts diagnose and not buttinski other parents. Would you
Like me to diagnose you? No? Because I don't know you and I'm
Not qualified? Exactly.

Impulse control and aggression are cOmpletely different things. My children have never ever
Hit anyone. My DS has run into the street.

I have no idea where you got the thing about SN kids being on teams. My kids have been. What's your point.

And by going out of your way to insult parents of kids with SN you illustrate why many of us feel you don't belong here,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. ... This time, our son did just as we instructed. He pushed the boy who is twice his size back....

nice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP may have a legitimate problem in there somewhere but it is obscured by the assumption she is making that aggressive kid = special needs. And then compounding it by coming here and essentially saying "hey parents of kids with special needs, one of your bullying children is misbehaving so tell me how to deal with this." Its really insulting and thats why most of us can't even get to the kernel of a legitimate issue in there.

This is where you went wrong, OP:

1. You are playing amateur diagnostician. It is incredibly presumptuous to do this. Most of us have had serious issues with the professionals in our DC's lives, like teachers and such, jumping in where they don't belong. You aren't even a professional.

2. The assumption that aggressive kid equals special needs. Some of our kids do have impulse control issues but there is far from a one to one correlation there. I know my kids -- DC 1 with ADHD, and DC 2 with AS and ADHD -- are the gentlest kids you could meet.

3. Then you come here and ask us to help you, compounding problems one and two. As i wrote, you are sending the message that you see us as parents of kids who are little monsters.

4. I have no idea idea whether you are even credible when it comes to this other mother. You are definitely stirring the kettle here by kicking up more drama than the situation entails.

Just go to general parenting.

This is where you went wrong, PP:

1. You think that other parents are not capable of watching from the sidelines and determining what constitutes the range of normal kid behaviors vs. a child or children whose behaviors are clearly out of the norm. I know you want to think all SN kids just blend in seamlessly. This doesn't always happen. A reasonably astute parent can figure it out with observation.

2. Impulse control goes hand in had with physical aggression in young children. It's a fair assumption whether you want it to be or not.

3. You come here and pretend that a SN child may not actually be on a soccer team.

4. I have not idea if you are even credible.

NP here.

OP, you are an idiot who doesn't have the slightest idea what she is talking about. You have described a child that is bored and aggressive. Kids who do not have special needs are bored or aggressive all the time. You also described a crap parent who doesn't intervene with the child when he is aggressive. Kids who do not have special needs but who have behavior problems frequently have crap parents.

Kids with special needs are not more likely to be bullies than kids who do not have special needs. Kids with special needs are more likely to BE BULLIED. Your ignorance on this topic and your insistence that this aggressive child is a child with special needs has crossed over into offensive and rude.

Please leave. You aren't listening. You aren't trying to learn anything. You have terrible social skills. Your lack of intelligence and sheer ignorance is impervious to penetration.

[jsteele]

This thread has probably provided all the help it is ever going to provide. So, probably time to shut it down.