How tolerant are private schools towards neurodiversity?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The tolerance of ND related issues goes down as the kids get older. The teachers get fed up and so the peers.

PPs aren't even just talking about tolerance they want full supports and accommodations and retraining teachers to deal with varying unique needs. That's just not what the private schools do best.

I think most folks are more realistic and seek out schools better suited to handle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think it’s about being “tolerant.” But most private schools simply don’t have the resources for neuro divergent students.

It’s not that. It’s that the other parents are purchasing a set of peers that is of a certain type/level. Kids with autism don’t meet that social expectation even if they are “well behaved” and don’t need much support beyond what the other kids might need. Think Napoleon Dynamite. ADHD is a different story - kids with ADHD are often very outgoing and charming and socially on par (or even popular). Of course this is all muddied by parents claiming kids with any difficulty are “ND” which makes it harder to assess claims that such-and-such a private school is “so accepting of neurodiversity.”

This is interesting and I’ve never heard it discussed. At our school a lot of moms will spill that their popular, social butterfly kid is “neurodiverse” or “special needs” and then upon further questioning admit that they mean medicated ADHD. Whereas I have the Napoleon Dynamite kid (he’s much cuter though) who doesn’t meet their standard for parties etc. luckily he gets a lot of support from admin who encourage him to do ECs and he got a lead in the play, a leadership role in student council and stuff like that

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Adderall is amphetamines. They used to give it to Nazis so they could fight better.

Unrelated to the topic at hand. By the way, you also don't understand how medication works on a neurodivergent brain compared to a neurotypical brain. It's not quite the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No I am saying we live in a pharma nutty culture where the pharma companies main goal is to make addicted kids for life and when these kids are hyped on on drugs they are bouncing off the walls and dealing their pills throughout the schools.

Everyone wants a diagnosis to explain that kids are kids and that usually they test everyone, have rebellious phases, and experiment drugs and alcohol. If we proactively call human behavior ND in order to give them crazy pills then it indicates the countries love affair with dangerous drugs, quick fixes, and unfair playing fields. Further it shows parents and school systems will be swift and inconsiderate if the consequences of head meds for kids that make patients for life.

IOW, no, you don’t know anything about ND students.

Or the medication they take. Why do people comment on things they are utterly clueless about? PP, this topic is NOT about 'kids being kids" and going through phases. I assure you the doctors making diagnoses are fully aware of the phases kids go through. Sheesh.

Incidently, my kid with ADHD did none of the things you describe as 'normal' kid behavior. He was literally never once a behavior problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Inattentive ADHD and mild ASD are fine, especially if the child is 2E with high IQ. But few privates have much capacity (or will) to accommodate anything else.

+1. A well behaved neurodiverse kid who will boost the school's academic profile will be warmly welcomed.

So basically a kid without a real diagnosis.

DP: You don't know what you are talking about.

[Anonymous]

All the kids are on some sorta pills these days. Its difficult dealing with the spazzy ones. The chill pill kids are easier going. Gosh bless big pharma and the work they do because they know that people need to have their pills to live productive lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At the private school I teach in, some neurodiversity is welcomed and supported. However, we have had many kids with extreme behaviors in kindergarten and 1st with extreme behaviors. (masturbating in class frequently, eloping, harming others, threatening to kill everyone, don't comply with directives frequently, etc) These students were allowed to stay either the entire year or both years. Usually, though by the end of 1st, that is the end of the tolerance window. And it is only tolerated if the parents are good partners. This means they are attending all meetings, getting their kids OT or a neuropysch or therapy or something. But the parents who ignore requests for meetings, who refuse to get a neuropsych, those families are counseled out at year's end, maybe in a few cases mid year.

We do have MANY kids with dyslexia and ADHD and some with other specialized learning profiles. Our school can support some, but not all of these needs. I am really shocked at the families who will spend more on K-12 education than I pay in tuition for my college kids who have their heads in the sand. I don't understand refusing to even consider that one's child might have some kind of a disability. I also don't understand being unwilling to even try medication for adhd AND being angry about being counseled out when your kid is disrupting learning for everyone. It's fine to not medicate, but a private school doesn't have to allow kids who cannot be successful in a gen Ed room to stay.

I wish PP could name the school. This situation sounds outrageous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child with ADHD, anxiety, and OCD is at Bullis and they have been there since elementary school. It is because of the education and learning support that they received that they will be attending a top 40 school this fall. My child learned to think critically, work individually and in groups, but most importantly, they had support to help them when they faltered. What I love about Bullis is that you can be on an Ivy League path and get the challenge you need, or be on a regular path and be supported and encouraged.

Congratulations! This is fantastic, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the kids are on some sorta pills these days. Its difficult dealing with the spazzy ones. The chill pill kids are easier going. Gosh bless big pharma and the work they do because they know that people need to have their pills to live productive lives.

Wow—that is a crazy take!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child with ADHD, anxiety, and OCD is at Bullis and they have been there since elementary school. It is because of the education and learning support that they received that they will be attending a top 40 school this fall. My child learned to think critically, work individually and in groups, but most importantly, they had support to help them when they faltered. What I love about Bullis is that you can be on an Ivy League path and get the challenge you need, or be on a regular path and be supported and encouraged.

Bullis does better than most but given the price, they could do better. This is true for so many overpriced privates iN DC/VA/MD

We had a terrible experience at Bullis. I think a difference is if the kid is there from elementary when they give the effort to help support needs and the kids have a basis for how and when to ask for help and the school has helped “train” them from an earlier age. Starting in 9th the school was not helpful and refused to actually do many of the accommodations in DC’s learning plan that they had agreed to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child with ADHD, anxiety, and OCD is at Bullis and they have been there since elementary school. It is because of the education and learning support that they received that they will be attending a top 40 school this fall. My child learned to think critically, work individually and in groups, but most importantly, they had support to help them when they faltered. What I love about Bullis is that you can be on an Ivy League path and get the challenge you need, or be on a regular path and be supported and encouraged.

Bullis does better than most but given the price, they could do better. This is true for so many overpriced privates iN DC/VA/MD

We had a terrible experience at Bullis. I think a difference is if the kid is there from elementary when they give the effort to help support needs and the kids have a basis for how and when to ask for help and the school has helped “train” them from an earlier age. Starting in 9th the school was not helpful and refused to actually do many of the accommodations in DC’s learning plan that they had agreed to.

I’m the poster with the child at Bullis and I think you may be right. We put him in private early bc we knew he needed the support and when we started there, it was an amazing experience in the lower school. I have heard it has changed, and if that’s true, that makes me sad bc it used to be such a nurturing place that really gave my child a solid foundation. They looked forward to going to school everyday.