When your spouse buys the cheap stuff but eats the good stuff

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and his family are like this. Greedy little gluttons. It took a while to train him out of it.

When we moved into our first house he ran around excitedly placing his objects in prime locations and claiming all the best closet space like he was competing with a sibling. I said oh hell no. I once made an Asian dish with shrimp, vegetables, rice and chicken and set it out bar style as the kids won’t eat shrimp, some adults were vegetarian, etc. I turned around and he simply added rice to the shrimp serving dish and walked away it. I had to tell him you take a serving you don’t take the serving dish.

When I was pregnant, I finished making kids breakfast, getting MIL coffee and pastries and was making myself an English muffin. As I was holding the muffin, raising it to eat it, she plucked it out of my hands and took it saying umm, yum yum. I told her how rude that was to do.

You have to be direct. These people weren’t raised right.

😲 How did you marry into this? How have you stayed married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hide the good apples this week. Report back and tell us if he ate his crap apples.

+1

[Anonymous]

My husband is a vacuum cleaner.

He eats two full meals when I think I’ll have leftovers. He ate my cookie batter from the fridge and the chocolate chips I’d set aside for cookies.

I’ve started hiding food or it won’t be in the pantry when I want to cook something.

He also leaves crumbs or four cashews in a bag so we have several bags of chips and nuts food food dust or a few bits in them.

It must be something from childhood.

[Anonymous]

Are you sure this isn’t a passive aggressive (or at this point, aggressive-aggressive) attempt to get out of grocery shopping? Like trying to see how badly he can botch it until you say “f it, I’ll buy everything myself from now on?”

[Anonymous]

Wow I appreciate this post. When I eat out w my husband he stretches to finish my food too,even if he’s full. He will order “light because hes trying to be healthy” like a salmon dish while I get steak, eat his dish in 3 minutes and no longer look me in the eye. He just stares at my food. The whole 20 minutes I’m still eating. Or if we get takeout or I make something expensive like crab cakes, he always has more room and overeats to finish it all, versus when we get a rotisserie chicken. Then suddenly he’s full very quickly.

[Anonymous]

Do you have a car? Tell him to stop buying what he's buying and either have him change what he's buying to what you both want, or drive and pick up 2x the apples, beer, make 2x the salad dressing, etc...

[Anonymous]

This thread is incredibly entertaining! Why are men like this?!? Is it because they weigh more and thus eat more? My Dh is 50lbs heavier than me. Do people who are the same weights also have this problem?

My Dh eats like a teenaged boy. He is still thoughtful though. If I buy a box of Oreos he will eat the entire thing and leave me 2 cookies as a peace offering. He also stays away from food if he knows it’s for company. We joke it’s “family hold back.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just hide the good food from him from now on. Don’t you have a drawer or something? He sounds rude.

This sounds like an elaborate, flowery troll post.

But if it isn’t the H is self centered.

[Anonymous]

Wow! What a first world problem! Divorce him.

[Anonymous]

My former husband was like this. My current husband will drive to my favorite farm with me every Sunday to get the good apples for the week. He’ll go with me to the other farm for the peaches and the other farm for the strawberries. He knows I love fresh in season fruit and is happy to help me procure it. He wouldn’t dream of eating all of the good apples. Don’t waste a more time with this jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow I appreciate this post. When I eat out w my husband he stretches to finish my food too,even if he’s full. He will order “light because hes trying to be healthy” like a salmon dish while I get steak, eat his dish in 3 minutes and no longer look me in the eye. He just stares at my food. The whole 20 minutes I’m still eating. Or if we get takeout or I make something expensive like crab cakes, he always has more room and overeats to finish it all, versus when we get a rotisserie chicken. Then suddenly he’s full very quickly.

It’s self centered need and lack of consideration for others.

It got to the point at home I have to hide the nice stuff. He’s too lazy to notice.

And if we’re out at dinner sharing appetizers or a meal or tapas or dessert I now have to immediately divide the food in half. I eat my half at a normal speed. He inhales all his half - barely tasting it- asap. If I don’t do that he will eat 2/3s or 3/4s of the whole table before I take a couple bites.

He was fat as a kid, I intend to ask his parents how and why that happened. And then shut up and see what they have to say for themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Example 1: Apples. So many apples are disappointingly terrible - mushy, soft, flavorless, blech. One particular stand at the farmers market sells the best apples in the world. I try to buy some of these delicious apples every week, but I walk to the market and can't lug 20 pounds of apples home. DH goes to the grocery store and buys mealy Granny Smiths and Red Deliciouses, which would be fine if he ate them. But he doesn't eat them because they're bad. He eats all of the delicious farmers market apples instead. He brings several farmers market apples to work for his snack, he munches them on his commute, he ignores the bad apples, and then there are no good ones left.

Example 2: Beer. We like a beer from time to time. Now that I am past a certain age I don't want cheap, tasteless beer like Coors and Bud Light, so when I go to the store I buy beer that I like. When DH goes to the store, he buys whichever beer is cheapest. The problem is that he drinks all the good beer first and leaves the crappy beer behind. And when I want a beer, what's left? Coors.

Example 3: Salad dressing. I make a very good vinaigrette. Even kids eat salads with my vinaigrette! I don't love creamy dressings like ranch or Caesar, but that's OK because my vinaigrette is there in the fridge. Oh wait, no, it's not in the fridge! DH finished it today, even though he only managed to be home for 10 minutes and there was at least a cupful left yesterday. Maybe my vinaigrette is so good he drinks it straight.

When I say something like, "Please leave some of the good apples for me," he scoffs and says "I EAT AN APPLE A DAY." -- "I know you eat an apple a day, but can you save a couple of the good ones for me?" -- "HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO TELL APPLES APART? I EAT AN APPLE A DAY." -- "But you bought these Granny Smiths ... don't you want them?" - "I EAT AN APPLE A DAY. I GRAB AN APPLE. I EAT IT." -- "Can you save me one good apple?" -- "IT'S AN APPLE. GOD, YOU'RE OVERREACTING. CAN'T I EAT A GOOD APPLE? I DON'T DESERVE GOOD APPLES?"

I kind of hate him.

You grew up in a house with all girls huh? You probably had a cute doll house and had tea parties. 🥰.

Food not eaten within the half hour of you bringing it home is fair game when you have brothers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's what no one has the heart to tell you:

He knows exactly what he's doing. He's playing a game of "What can I get away with? How can I nickle and dime this dummy and play the fool when she brings it up?" He's eating your apples deliberately and is perfectly capable of telling the difference. He gets a sadistic or selfish kick out of being the one in the household to eat all the "good stuff" and leave you with the junky stuff. He's a fundamentally selfish, anti-socially competitive person.

And deep down inside, you know this.

+ 1. And even if we give him the benefit of the doubt re: apples (hey, they're all red-pink spectrum after all), there is NO way in hell that the guy doesn't know the difference between the value of a Coors and the value of a good Belgian red-brown pint.

Regarding the bolded ^^^, the detail about racing through the shared dessert in a restaurant -- leaving you none -- confirms this. FFS, you're sitting right there 2 feet from his face -- do NOT let him claim "What? What? I didn't know you were enjoying it because you didn't spell it out for me and your half was disappearing more slowly than my side of the cake." He's a dick in sheep's clothing

DP

And his mother is the same way. Comes to “help” on maternity leave and eats all the gift foods from my friends and work they sent. Inventories all the cupboards and eats the nicest stuff first. Has the gall to say: Don’t want anything to go to waste! Eats 4-5x a day when staying with us but only 2x a day when we stay there.
The father snacks constantly, crumbs are everywhere he goes.
The make a game out of trying to never pay for groceries or meals out. And if it does come up they immediately say they do not want to split the meal, you get this one and they’ll get the next “thing”. Then proceed to order a glass of wine, salad, steak dinner, dessert. The next day they’ll spot an ice cream stand and say it’s their turn to buy the kids a cone!

It’s like some greedy sport to them. And they have $3m in the bank in rental properties.

[Anonymous]

Aldi has good apples and they are cheap. The ones called honey crisp

[Anonymous]

In laws came for Thanksgiving and at the entire shelf of kids’ individually wrapped snacks for school Monday - Wed while we were at work and they were at home w the kids. Well H was working from home so should have helped out more. It was 3 months supply for 3 kids.

Meanwhile we had $600 of real food from Costco out in the house.