I hate parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's behind your desire to convert to Catholicism? Given your emotional state, that sounds like a terrible idea.

We want to send him to a Catschool. My husband is Catholic although not confirmed. I wanted to join a community of faith in searching for more meaning in life. Although i've found some meaning in spirituality, the weekly classes have become a chore. They end around 8:30 and I need to get home quickly and get up for work the next morning at 5AM for work, all to be woken up at 1 or 3AM by my kid wanting to come in my bed.

You don't have to be Catholic to send your kids to a catholic school. We are evangelical and our kids go to catholic school. No issue! Don't convert for school...They'll be happy to take your money, Catholic or not. .one less thing on your plate.

[Anonymous]

There’s a lot of things in your post that just don’t make sense. Your husband wasn’t unemployed, he was working out of state. Regardless, let’s say he gambled it all away. Do you know how many welfare programs are available for low earners? If you couldn’t afford food you go on SNAP, not pay with credit cards. If you have one kid and you’re $20k in debt of course you sell your minivan and buy a little sedan at half the price. While you’re at it, cash out on the market while it’s still ok, sell your house and get a 2-BR condo. You don’t have to “fantasize about” any of this. Sounds like your husband can’t afford a week-long guys trip (since you’re now on SNAP!) so use that time to find a counselor and start going.

There is nothing in here that would prevent you from changing your circumstances and I’m not talking about divorce. These “woe-is-me, life just happens *to* me and I’m powerless” posts are really tiring. Your note a domestic abuse victim, put in some effort to make your life better instead of just going along with it.

[Anonymous]

1. Take care of yourself. He's 4.5, put him in a half day preschool and use that time to exercise and find a therapist to help you sort through your feelings.

2. This will be over next year when he starts Kindergarten.

3. Playdates, playdates, playdates.

[Anonymous]

I know this won't help you but this is why we have two children. They entertain each other. I would kill myself if I had an only child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s a lot of things in your post that just don’t make sense. Your husband wasn’t unemployed, he was working out of state. Regardless, let’s say he gambled it all away. Do you know how many welfare programs are available for low earners? If you couldn’t afford food you go on SNAP, not pay with credit cards. If you have one kid and you’re $20k in debt of course you sell your minivan and buy a little sedan at half the price. While you’re at it, cash out on the market while it’s still ok, sell your house and get a 2-BR condo. You don’t have to “fantasize about” any of this. Sounds like your husband can’t afford a week-long guys trip (since you’re now on SNAP!) so use that time to find a counselor and start going.

There is nothing in here that would prevent you from changing your circumstances and I’m not talking about divorce. These “woe-is-me, life just happens *to* me and I’m powerless” posts are really tiring. Your note a domestic abuse victim, put in some effort to make your life better instead of just going along with it.

I'm betting one of her parents made her feel worthless and now she has zero self esteem and she repainting a different version of the same scenario in her adult life

Something else OP, if you're on hormonal birth control that can worsen depression

[Anonymous]

You have one kid. You can get a small car. Again, so many of these are problems of your own making.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another idea for childcare: ask the other moms at your son's school if they would pick him up when they get their own kid and watch him for pay, then your DH picks him up at 3.

We are so bent on saddling other women with work as long as it makes it simple for the male. This mentality has to stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another idea for childcare: ask the other moms at your son's school if they would pick him up when they get their own kid and watch him for pay, then your DH picks him up at 3.

We are so bent on saddling other women with work as long as it makes it simple for the male. This mentality has to stop.

I am not PP but paying a female to watch your kids during work hours (I would never allow a non-related male to watch my kids alone) is not anti-feminist, dipwad.

[Anonymous]

Don't have kids

[Anonymous]

I have two and parenting is miserable just pure misery every day I want to fast forward my life so they’re out of the house.

[Anonymous]

Pretend bday parties with cakes and cookies made out of playdough or using a play kitchen is the way to go.

If you are able to I recommend putting your child in daycare or preschool and taking care of yourself is the way to go. I hope you feel better soon!

[Anonymous]

This is kind of normal but people won’t admit it. It’s a recent thing that parenting is supposed to be enjoyable and fulfilling. Sure people loved their children but parenting was viewed as another type of work. Now you have grown 35 year old women pretending that playing Lego’s and wiping butts is enjoyable. Don’t fall for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't have kids

Are you the person who also suggests adoption constantly and getting rid of pets? Tell me, what in life brings 100% satisfaction and/or happiness? Life is hard.

Jobs, pets, family relationships, kids — everything is challenging. The trick here isn’t to give up everything because that will also make you sad and lonely and depressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know this won't help you but this is why we have two children. They entertain each other. I would kill myself if I had an only child.

Definitely wasted your time writing this. Next.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is kind of normal but people won’t admit it. It’s a recent thing that parenting is supposed to be enjoyable and fulfilling. Sure people loved their children but parenting was viewed as another type of work. Now you have grown 35 year old women pretending that playing Lego’s and wiping butts is enjoyable. Don’t fall for it.

The introvert mom, energetic extrovert son combo is a special kind of misery. Some day he will be older and will be up the butt of his buddies and not mommy.

OP before you get a divorce, ask yourself if it is truly solving problems or just trading the old set of problems for a new set of problems. If you are stressed about finances divorce will not help that problem. OP's DH seems dead average in the DH department to me.