Invited neighbor friends over

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have a real horse in this race but I’m struck by the sneering tone so many people here are using at being invited to a neighbor’s house for dinner. No, it’s not tea with the queen, but if someone graciously opens up their home to you and shows hospitality, that’s not nothing. So many people complain about being lonely, but then when someone makes an effort to reach out, it’s met with so little appreciation. Maybe people should stay home if going to someone’s house for dinner is such a chore that they can’t drag themselves out of whatever they were already wearing that day.

right but i do think most people probably DON'T really want to go to their neighbor's house for dinner. If they're not a good enough friend that you can wear what you want, then it is a chore. What is fun about going to someone's house for dinner who is not your friend? Presumably if they are sweatpants ppl and OP is judgy, curtain twitching, too much free time and thus writing this post type, they probably dont actually especially like op and have noticed this. And just went to be polite. If they found out that op didn't like them and wont have them back, I can't imagine they'd care. was an obligation yes. dont ever assume you are doing someone a favor by asking them over for dinner.

Do you really feel this way? Why not just say no when you get an invite then?

I would but hard if it's a neighbor you have to see all the time. there's no polite way to say 'I don't like you and i dont want to come to your house now or ever'. You have to just go. I'm 100% sure these people don't give a rats *ss what OP thinks of them, they just dont want OP to activey hate them bc that's super awkward if you live right next to each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't know many adult women who wear sweatpants out of the house, and certainly not to any social event. So just an FYI--if you are invited to someone's home for dinner in NYC, do not wear sweatpants. You will stand out, and not in a good way.

i'm from NYC and this is absolutely false

Staten Island?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have a real horse in this race but I’m struck by the sneering tone so many people here are using at being invited to a neighbor’s house for dinner. No, it’s not tea with the queen, but if someone graciously opens up their home to you and shows hospitality, that’s not nothing. So many people complain about being lonely, but then when someone makes an effort to reach out, it’s met with so little appreciation. Maybe people should stay home if going to someone’s house for dinner is such a chore that they can’t drag themselves out of whatever they were already wearing that day.

right but i do think most people probably DON'T really want to go to their neighbor's house for dinner. If they're not a good enough friend that you can wear what you want, then it is a chore. What is fun about going to someone's house for dinner who is not your friend? Presumably if they are sweatpants ppl and OP is judgy, curtain twitching, too much free time and thus writing this post type, they probably dont actually especially like op and have noticed this. And just went to be polite. If they found out that op didn't like them and wont have them back, I can't imagine they'd care. was an obligation yes. dont ever assume you are doing someone a favor by asking them over for dinner.

If you don't want to go to your neighbor's house, then use your words and decline. Don't go while silently conveying your disdain by wearing any old thing you found on the floor of your closet. Don't assume YOU are doing them the favor by going.

Your post encapsulates everything awful about the DC area--cold, passive-aggressive, unfriendly, and ungracious.

but how would you decline?
neighbor - 'want to come over for dinner some time?'
sweatpants neighbor - 'no. no we never want to come over for dinner'

not possible.

also i'm not from DC!

How have you reached adulthood without learning how to softly decline things?

"Oh, that's so sweet of you. I'm actually in a really busy period at work, but when it relents, I'll let you know!" Then never let them know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree Op. no one is saying you had to be “dressed up” but I’d at least wear nice jeans and a dressy top.

‘Dressy top’ lol
Tell me you’re middle class suburban without telling me you’re middle class suburban

So?

+1.

Was that supposed to mean something. Most people are middle class suburban.

Just your typical DCUM snobbery

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With you OP. Can’t stand when people do this and wonder why they don’t get invited back. I don’t have family over for the same reason.

Wow

. right!.

The total lack of awareness should be astounding but this is DCUM

[Anonymous]

Wow some of these responses are harsh! I live in my yoga pants and wouldn't think twice about showing up to my neighbors bbq in sweats. But my neighbors also see me out and about, in yoga pants, as are they. We joke about it. We are casual with each other because we are relatively close friends.

I had a friend move back to town after 10+ years of living abroad, and invited her and her husband over. I was literally relieved when they showed up in sweats, because that's what I was wearing to welcome them hahaha. We had a great night with KBBQ and so much soju.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't know many adult women who wear sweatpants out of the house, and certainly not to any social event. So just an FYI--if you are invited to someone's home for dinner in NYC, do not wear sweatpants. You will stand out, and not in a good way.

i'm from NYC and this is absolutely false

Staten Island?

LOL no i'm just not 70 years old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have a real horse in this race but I’m struck by the sneering tone so many people here are using at being invited to a neighbor’s house for dinner. No, it’s not tea with the queen, but if someone graciously opens up their home to you and shows hospitality, that’s not nothing. So many people complain about being lonely, but then when someone makes an effort to reach out, it’s met with so little appreciation. Maybe people should stay home if going to someone’s house for dinner is such a chore that they can’t drag themselves out of whatever they were already wearing that day.

right but i do think most people probably DON'T really want to go to their neighbor's house for dinner. If they're not a good enough friend that you can wear what you want, then it is a chore. What is fun about going to someone's house for dinner who is not your friend? Presumably if they are sweatpants ppl and OP is judgy, curtain twitching, too much free time and thus writing this post type, they probably dont actually especially like op and have noticed this. And just went to be polite. If they found out that op didn't like them and wont have them back, I can't imagine they'd care. was an obligation yes. dont ever assume you are doing someone a favor by asking them over for dinner.

If you don't want to go to your neighbor's house, then use your words and decline. Don't go while silently conveying your disdain by wearing any old thing you found on the floor of your closet. Don't assume YOU are doing them the favor by going.

Your post encapsulates everything awful about the DC area--cold, passive-aggressive, unfriendly, and ungracious.

but how would you decline?
neighbor - 'want to come over for dinner some time?'
sweatpants neighbor - 'no. no we never want to come over for dinner'

not possible.

also i'm not from DC!

How have you reached adulthood without learning how to softly decline things?

"Oh, that's so sweet of you. I'm actually in a really busy period at work, but when it relents, I'll let you know!" Then never let them know.

that's very clearly still an FU.
the neighbors prob just thought we'll go and then it's done forever hopefully.

[Anonymous]

I would love them even more.

[Anonymous]

I feel like a lot of the posts on dcum lately all fall into the category of people not realizing how massively unimportant and uninteresting they are to most other ppl. This one and the post by the person who said 'do people not retain things they are told anymore' in off topic. Like - NO! Most people are not thinking about you or wanting to impress you or caring what you think. I am at peace with that and think it's super weird that others are all like 'DONT THEY KNOW WHO I AM?'. No one cares who you are! They have other sh*t going on. Get TF over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't know many adult women who wear sweatpants out of the house, and certainly not to any social event. So just an FYI--if you are invited to someone's home for dinner in NYC, do not wear sweatpants. You will stand out, and not in a good way.

I see women wearing athleisure out all the time. Hint: "joggers" are just fancy sweatpants. People wear yoga pants out. It's really not clear if the neighbors were wearing athleisure or ratty old sweatpants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't know many adult women who wear sweatpants out of the house, and certainly not to any social event. So just an FYI--if you are invited to someone's home for dinner in NYC, do not wear sweatpants. You will stand out, and not in a good way.

I see women wearing athleisure out all the time. Hint: "joggers" are just fancy sweatpants. People wear yoga pants out. It's really not clear if the neighbors were wearing athleisure or ratty old sweatpants.

every single celebrity is wearing sweatpants at nearly all times atm except on the red carpet. Fingers crossed they get OP's memo that they can't come over to eat dinner at her house in chevy chase or wherever unless they swap them out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't know many adult women who wear sweatpants out of the house, and certainly not to any social event. So just an FYI--if you are invited to someone's home for dinner in NYC, do not wear sweatpants. You will stand out, and not in a good way.

I see women wearing athleisure out all the time. Hint: "joggers" are just fancy sweatpants. People wear yoga pants out. It's really not clear if the neighbors were wearing athleisure or ratty old sweatpants.

+1. Men, too. These outfits are not the sweatsuits of yesteryear.

[Anonymous]

I don't think I'd care, but I don't wear sweats outside the house. It's definitely sad how slovenly our society has become. And I say this as someone who dresses pretty casually most days, but, you know, I try.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't know many adult women who wear sweatpants out of the house, and certainly not to any social event. So just an FYI--if you are invited to someone's home for dinner in NYC, do not wear sweatpants. You will stand out, and not in a good way.