Question for older men who date much younger women

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I'm mid 50s and male. I have never looked better, although I look more or less my age. (Maybe I look 5-10 years younger because I have been eating well, exercising, and dressing well lately.) My girlfriend is 20 years younger. She loves running her fingers through my salt and pepper hair and telling me how sexy it is.

I also have been very attracted to women my own age and older. based on those prior relationships, I completely agree with the prior comment that their hands, necks and faces age the most. Their sexual function seems different too. Though their bodies look fantastic, they seem slower to warm up and get lubricated than younger women. Forutnartely most of them still responded etremely well when I moved things along things slowly.

One thing that women of all ages have shown me is that a woman's sexul response depends a lot on where she is emotionally, how she is feeling at the moment, and how she likes to be held, touched, etc. I've had crazy hot sex for an extended period of time with a highly orgasmic woman who was almost 60, but she told me she went three years without having an O at the end of her marriage. I also totally flopped with a woman in her mid-30s. I couldn't get her off no matter what I did--she said she preferred much rougher men.

30s to me was the lowest libido age. Child birth really affected it, and I had multiple endometriosis related surgeries. It was insane high and fast multiple Os in my 20s. I remember being so wet it was slurping and sheets all wet. Men in early 30s were best marches sexually, we would spend many hours in bed and they could finish 3-4 times
In my 40s the libido from 20s is almost back now that my child is grown up. It does take longer to warm up (but there are good V creams for that, and it’s probably couple min difference). If a man is hot I still finish pretty fast, but men 5+ years older are more on same page with me in terms of tempo, amplitude and time it takes us both to O. I like finishing at the same time with him. A younger man has to finish first then rest then put it in again to let me finish.

It’s just different preferences depending on age. I can understand why 50 yo man would date a 30 yo women - it’s the lower libido years for women with kids, professional demanding jobs etc.

This is thing thats weird to me. People always assume that guys like women in their 20’s because they’re somehow prettier. I find women at every age attractive. Attractive people are attractive - go figure. And, I think this applies for both men and women. The real benefit to dating a younger woman (in the bedroom at least) isn’t the beauty, its the libido. It’s nice to not be the high libido partner for once trying to keep your sex lives from dying. Having a partner who also wants (like really wants) sex, initiates and wants to have fun is amazing. On the slurping part, that was pretty shocking too. Like I was pretty much struggling not to go crosseyed.

A 40-50 yo man is not a libido match for a high libido 20 yo woman. I think you are either overestimating your libido or are dating low libido 20- yo women. At least it wasn’t for me when I was 20s. Only multi orgasmic and capable staying hard for hours or could resume multiple times would truly satisfy me. I didn’t even touch 40s+ men (after one unlucky attempt - he only finished twice and couldn’t get hard again). I had plenty of fish in late 20-early 30 range. Now I am 40s but my dating range remained pretty much the same on the upper end (up to 7 years older); plus a new group - up to 5 years younger men- was added. I now find them sexually attractive but when I was 25 dating a 20 yo man wouldn’t be cool at all!

Wow. When I was a young man I wanted sex every day and that was too much for the women I was with. But I never did it 3 times in a day and rarely 2 times. I did give them plenty of Os though. Now tnat I am in older middle aged my drive is a bit lower. Finishing twice is pretty unusual, although it happens. Fortunately my tongue has a lot of endurance.

Tongue is not enough for a woman with V type of climaxing. Nothing compares to a hard P.

This. It’s mandatory.

Upon reading men’s comments it seems they have no clue about women’s wants and needs, never took time to really learn a woman at least sexually, and are just all about their own ego and satisfaction. I’m not of a very high opinion of men, I guess. Poor 20 yo students who are getting this first sexual experiences with someone who stuffs them with alcohol to reduce libido so they can fit into his 50 yo man viagra induced short-lived stunts in bed.

I’m 45 and these have not been my issues at all. But the 20-24yo does always initiate the breakup and the age difference is the reason given. In a city like DC it’s east to move on.

If you are 45 and dating a 20-22 year old you have serious mental and maturity problems. I was still in college at 20,21 and nowhere near wise enough to understand what a 45 yo man was about. The probably believe your lies and think they are in control until a friend talks some sense into them. This is so gross. It’s pretty close to statutory rape.

The way he responds actually does show he has serious mental issues. He acknowledged taking girls to the bars and serving heavy alcohol to suppress their libido of 20 year olds. Then he takes them to bed and take viagra (as he's unable to satisfy a 20yo naturally otherwise).

It's a very disturbing portreit here indeed of a 40-50 yo man who dates much younger!

I’m the most recent 45yo commenting here and don’t drink or use any drugs (including viagra).

And I’ve never dated anyone too young to vote since I was 17 myself.

This is the PP comment that I was talking about, not sure if it was you or some other guy:

"I enjoy visiting new cocktail bars on my dates, and alcohol is known to have an affect on performance, even for the most eager 20 year old. The pill helps with that too."

Regardless, it's wishful thinking for a guy pushing 50 or post 50 to think a 20 something woman is truly satisfied and happy with him. She's just not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm mid 50s and male. I have never looked better, although I look more or less my age. (Maybe I look 5-10 years younger because I have been eating well, exercising, and dressing well lately.) My girlfriend is 20 years younger. She loves running her fingers through my salt and pepper hair and telling me how sexy it is.

I also have been very attracted to women my own age and older. based on those prior relationships, I completely agree with the prior comment that their hands, necks and faces age the most. Their sexual function seems different too. Though their bodies look fantastic, they seem slower to warm up and get lubricated than younger women. Forutnartely most of them still responded etremely well when I moved things along things slowly.

One thing that women of all ages have shown me is that a woman's sexul response depends a lot on where she is emotionally, how she is feeling at the moment, and how she likes to be held, touched, etc. I've had crazy hot sex for an extended period of time with a highly orgasmic woman who was almost 60, but she told me she went three years without having an O at the end of her marriage. I also totally flopped with a woman in her mid-30s. I couldn't get her off no matter what I did--she said she preferred much rougher men.

30s to me was the lowest libido age. Child birth really affected it, and I had multiple endometriosis related surgeries. It was insane high and fast multiple Os in my 20s. I remember being so wet it was slurping and sheets all wet. Men in early 30s were best marches sexually, we would spend many hours in bed and they could finish 3-4 times
In my 40s the libido from 20s is almost back now that my child is grown up. It does take longer to warm up (but there are good V creams for that, and it’s probably couple min difference). If a man is hot I still finish pretty fast, but men 5+ years older are more on same page with me in terms of tempo, amplitude and time it takes us both to O. I like finishing at the same time with him. A younger man has to finish first then rest then put it in again to let me finish.

It’s just different preferences depending on age. I can understand why 50 yo man would date a 30 yo women - it’s the lower libido years for women with kids, professional demanding jobs etc.

This is thing thats weird to me. People always assume that guys like women in their 20’s because they’re somehow prettier. I find women at every age attractive. Attractive people are attractive - go figure. And, I think this applies for both men and women. The real benefit to dating a younger woman (in the bedroom at least) isn’t the beauty, its the libido. It’s nice to not be the high libido partner for once trying to keep your sex lives from dying. Having a partner who also wants (like really wants) sex, initiates and wants to have fun is amazing. On the slurping part, that was pretty shocking too. Like I was pretty much struggling not to go crosseyed.

A 40-50 yo man is not a libido match for a high libido 20 yo woman. I think you are either overestimating your libido or are dating low libido 20- yo women. At least it wasn’t for me when I was 20s. Only multi orgasmic and capable staying hard for hours or could resume multiple times would truly satisfy me. I didn’t even touch 40s+ men (after one unlucky attempt - he only finished twice and couldn’t get hard again). I had plenty of fish in late 20-early 30 range. Now I am 40s but my dating range remained pretty much the same on the upper end (up to 7 years older); plus a new group - up to 5 years younger men- was added. I now find them sexually attractive but when I was 25 dating a 20 yo man wouldn’t be cool at all!

Wow. When I was a young man I wanted sex every day and that was too much for the women I was with. But I never did it 3 times in a day and rarely 2 times. I did give them plenty of Os though. Now tnat I am in older middle aged my drive is a bit lower. Finishing twice is pretty unusual, although it happens. Fortunately my tongue has a lot of endurance.

Tongue is not enough for a woman with V type of climaxing. Nothing compares to a hard P.

This. It’s mandatory.

Upon reading men’s comments it seems they have no clue about women’s wants and needs, never took time to really learn a woman at least sexually, and are just all about their own ego and satisfaction. I’m not of a very high opinion of men, I guess. Poor 20 yo students who are getting this first sexual experiences with someone who stuffs them with alcohol to reduce libido so they can fit into his 50 yo man viagra induced short-lived stunts in bed.

I’m 45 and these have not been my issues at all. But the 20-24yo does always initiate the breakup and the age difference is the reason given. In a city like DC it’s east to move on.

If you are 45 and dating a 20-22 year old you have serious mental and maturity problems. I was still in college at 20,21 and nowhere near wise enough to understand what a 45 yo man was about. The probably believe your lies and think they are in control until a friend talks some sense into them. This is so gross. It’s pretty close to statutory rape.

The way he responds actually does show he has serious mental issues. He acknowledged taking girls to the bars and serving heavy alcohol to suppress their libido of 20 year olds. Then he takes them to bed and take viagra (as he's unable to satisfy a 20yo naturally otherwise).

It's a very disturbing portreit here indeed of a 40-50 yo man who dates much younger!

I’m the most recent 45yo commenting here and don’t drink or use any drugs (including viagra).

And I’ve never dated anyone too young to vote since I was 17 myself.

This is the PP comment that I was talking about, not sure if it was you or some other guy:

"I enjoy visiting new cocktail bars on my dates, and alcohol is known to have an affect on performance, even for the most eager 20 year old. The pill helps with that too."

Regardless, it's wishful thinking for a guy pushing 50 or post 50 to think a 20 something woman is truly satisfied and happy with him. She's just not.

I’m the non-alcohol using responder and your last sentence could be right. These relationships have a shelf life of two weeks to six months for me so far. (Being in lockdown with a friend from May to November 2020 was pretty fun). I don’t get too attached and don’t make claims that I’m the best lover they ever had. I do treat everyone with respect, am unfailingly honest and have remained on friendly terms with every ex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm mid 50s and male. I have never looked better, although I look more or less my age. (Maybe I look 5-10 years younger because I have been eating well, exercising, and dressing well lately.) My girlfriend is 20 years younger. She loves running her fingers through my salt and pepper hair and telling me how sexy it is.

I also have been very attracted to women my own age and older. based on those prior relationships, I completely agree with the prior comment that their hands, necks and faces age the most. Their sexual function seems different too. Though their bodies look fantastic, they seem slower to warm up and get lubricated than younger women. Forutnartely most of them still responded etremely well when I moved things along things slowly.

One thing that women of all ages have shown me is that a woman's sexul response depends a lot on where she is emotionally, how she is feeling at the moment, and how she likes to be held, touched, etc. I've had crazy hot sex for an extended period of time with a highly orgasmic woman who was almost 60, but she told me she went three years without having an O at the end of her marriage. I also totally flopped with a woman in her mid-30s. I couldn't get her off no matter what I did--she said she preferred much rougher men.

30s to me was the lowest libido age. Child birth really affected it, and I had multiple endometriosis related surgeries. It was insane high and fast multiple Os in my 20s. I remember being so wet it was slurping and sheets all wet. Men in early 30s were best marches sexually, we would spend many hours in bed and they could finish 3-4 times
In my 40s the libido from 20s is almost back now that my child is grown up. It does take longer to warm up (but there are good V creams for that, and it’s probably couple min difference). If a man is hot I still finish pretty fast, but men 5+ years older are more on same page with me in terms of tempo, amplitude and time it takes us both to O. I like finishing at the same time with him. A younger man has to finish first then rest then put it in again to let me finish.

It’s just different preferences depending on age. I can understand why 50 yo man would date a 30 yo women - it’s the lower libido years for women with kids, professional demanding jobs etc.

This is thing thats weird to me. People always assume that guys like women in their 20’s because they’re somehow prettier. I find women at every age attractive. Attractive people are attractive - go figure. And, I think this applies for both men and women. The real benefit to dating a younger woman (in the bedroom at least) isn’t the beauty, its the libido. It’s nice to not be the high libido partner for once trying to keep your sex lives from dying. Having a partner who also wants (like really wants) sex, initiates and wants to have fun is amazing. On the slurping part, that was pretty shocking too. Like I was pretty much struggling not to go crosseyed.

A 40-50 yo man is not a libido match for a high libido 20 yo woman. I think you are either overestimating your libido or are dating low libido 20- yo women. At least it wasn’t for me when I was 20s. Only multi orgasmic and capable staying hard for hours or could resume multiple times would truly satisfy me. I didn’t even touch 40s+ men (after one unlucky attempt - he only finished twice and couldn’t get hard again). I had plenty of fish in late 20-early 30 range. Now I am 40s but my dating range remained pretty much the same on the upper end (up to 7 years older); plus a new group - up to 5 years younger men- was added. I now find them sexually attractive but when I was 25 dating a 20 yo man wouldn’t be cool at all!

Wow. When I was a young man I wanted sex every day and that was too much for the women I was with. But I never did it 3 times in a day and rarely 2 times. I did give them plenty of Os though. Now tnat I am in older middle aged my drive is a bit lower. Finishing twice is pretty unusual, although it happens. Fortunately my tongue has a lot of endurance.

Tongue is not enough for a woman with V type of climaxing. Nothing compares to a hard P.

Except for fingers, dildos, anything oblong basically.

Nope. Those things are not alive and cannot feel pleasure. Fingers are obviously not a substitute.

[Anonymous]

What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

Not the PP answering you here. IN my experience, most of them are on bad terms with their parents.

Thaaaaat…makes a lot of sense.

+1

Another 50 something man here. Yes, most of the women who are more than 15 years younger have had bad relationships with their parents. Especially their mothers. (People say that such women have daddy issues, but I've seen more mommy issues.)

I have a very good relationship with my daughter. A lot of women I date find this very appealing.

How do you manage to perform with 20 yo women? Just curious. They need to get off several times, don’t they ?

I've dated a couple iof women 20 years younger (both in their mid-30s) and one of them definitely does get off several times. She also wakes me up when she wants to do it again. She's smart, fun, ambitious, attractive and extremely horny. We are getting along well and I think she might turn into a very long term relationship. I had a similar experience with a woman who was 15 years younger.

There was another woman was 20 years younger and didn't get off even once with me. She dumped me after two months. I was very attracted to her when I looked at her (with or without clothes) and also when I talked to her (she was very smart and interesteing), but I was never very physically into her when we touched each other, and she sensed it. It was obvious. I was flustered when I was with her and thought I had suddenly gotten eretcile dysfunction. After she dumped me, I dated a couple of women in their 50s and my performance and confidence imrpoved a whole lot.

I'd probably still be dating a woman in her 50s now if the new woman in her 30s hadn't entered my life. Neither of us has needed any assistance of any kind. No pills. No lubes. No machines or toys. Everything just works extremely very well, sometimes for hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

I'm not the person you were addressing but I think this is a very obnixious comment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

NP if that guy in his 40s has banged a series of 20-something women then he is a winner, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

I'm not the person you were addressing but I think this is a very obnixious comment.

It’s fitting for what he’s doing. He’s a 45 year old man serially dating women who are under 22. That’s loserville. These women will go on to marry men closer to their own age while he for some reason can find any one anywhere within a decent range of his for a reason. If he were a winner he could date women who are 30. Not 20. 20 means he is a reject by anyone who has any life experience whatsoever.

[Anonymous]

^cannot find

[Anonymous]

45 dating 20 is NOT the same thing as 55 dating 30 or 65 dating 40. Even at older ages it’s a stretch but at 45/20 it’s manchild or predatory.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

I’m completely fine with my life and, based off previous (and current) experience, have zero doubt I’ll pivot just fine to dating women closer to my own age when I get too old to get dates the young 20s in the first place from the dating apps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

I’m completely fine with my life and, based off previous (and current) experience, have zero doubt I’ll pivot just fine to dating women closer to my own age when I get too old to get dates the young 20s in the first place from the dating apps.

Whoosh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Especially if there is an obvious age difference (like you could easily be mistaken for her dad), and said young woman came into your life in a “needy” position. Do you go out in public on dates? Do your friends and family know about her? Do you see a long-term relationship or marriage happening? Is it just to get through to the next “real” relationship? What do you have to talk about?

So many wrong assumptions there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you think it says about you that it takes even the youngest women only 2 weeks to 6 months to realize you are a total loser?

I’m completely fine with my life and, based off previous (and current) experience, have zero doubt I’ll pivot just fine to dating women closer to my own age when I get too old to get dates the young 20s in the first place from the dating apps.

Whoosh

On the first page of this thread I mentioned the women I typically dated before a bad breakup in 2019 (we’d discussed marriage, a second for us both) led me to give dating younger with no chance at marriage a try. All extremely intelligent and successful at the highest level (even by DCUM standards). Every morning I wake up every morning to a half dozen or more “likes” on hinge from women aged 22-45. Disease or bad fortune can strike any of us at any time, but it would take a major setback for me to ever worry I’ll be alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:45 dating 20 is NOT the same thing as 55 dating 30 or 65 dating 40. Even at older ages it’s a stretch but at 45/20 it’s manchild or predatory.

I agree, that is disturbing to me. While it is, yes, technically LEGAL - a 40-something man dating a young to mid-20s girl who is only a few years out of college is creepy and predatory. And yes I feel the same way about a middle aged woman dating a 25 year old guy