Affair, told his wife and now he's back

post reply Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
[Post New]10/14/2016 08:38
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Anonymous
Op, there's no getting out of this without being in pain. It's up to you to decide which kind of pain you want - the pain of no contact, or the pain of being in an affair. Those are the only options.
[Post New]10/14/2016 09:17
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Or blow it up again. Tell his wife about how he is still calling you and telling you he loves you.

That should do it.

You'd be a horrible human being, and a complete asshole, but that should finish this one way or another.

I agree that she should blow it up again but it won't make her an asshole. It'll be good for the wife to know that this is what reconciliation looks like to her husband.
[Post New]10/14/2016 09:18
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Or blow it up again. Tell his wife about how he is still calling you and telling you he loves you.

That should do it.

You'd be a horrible human being, and a complete asshole, but that should finish this one way or another.

I agree that she should blow it up again but it won't make her an asshole. It'll be good for the wife to know that this is what reconciliation looks like to her husband.


Yup. The wife deserves to know what she is dealing with...
[Post New]10/14/2016 12:16
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Anonymous
Since you are now getting a divorce why not see him? who knows he might leave his wife - I'd go for it.
[Post New]10/14/2016 12:26
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Ok. Let me have it. DW here, I had a 2 year affair with a married man, we thought it was love. We talked about divorcing and being together. After many ups and downs, the stress of the secrecy got to me and I exposed the affair to the world, including to my husband and his wife. All hell broke lose. Months later, I am in the process of a divorce, rightfully so, and he decided to work things out with his wife.

After about 4 months of silence from him, he contacted me again to talk and try to get closure from how things ended. That one phone call has now turned into several, all initiated by him. We have seen each other a few times, though not sexually but there were love professions.

I know I should cut him off, I don't want to go down that road again but my heart is weak. He should be 100% committed to reconciliation with his wife, we both acknowledge that but knowing the "right" thing to do doesn't prevent him from reaching out and me responding.

How can I put a final end to this without that acute pain of loss?

He can't commit to her or you. Why do you want that wuss?




.


[Post New]10/14/2016 12:29
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Anonymous
Tell his wife. Please.
[Post New]10/14/2016 13:15
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Anonymous
Block the number then you won't get the calls and he'll stop calling. Problem solved.

[Post New]10/14/2016 14:01
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Good luck, OP, but cut him off, b/c he isn't leaving her.


Right. So unless you're okay with another affair tell him to get lost.

I'm not going to join in the group who figure you deserve life long pain and suffering because you had an affair. Everyone needs to move on.

Yes, I've been cheated on. I have absolutely no use for him whatsoever. He isn't worth spewing lifelong hatred on.
[Post New]10/14/2016 14:03
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Anonymous
Yes, you need to tell his wife. Not to blow anything up though.

I posted above. My ex is now living with HIV. Any person whose spouse can't figure out how to keep their pants on deserves the chance to protect themselves.
[Post New]10/14/2016 14:11
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Anonymous
Dogs always return to sniff their own mess.
[Post New]10/14/2016 14:16
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Anonymous
I hope your ex is getting custody of the kids op. Doesn't sound like you have time to give them any thought.
[Post New]10/14/2016 14:21
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Could be your soulmate. Take a chance.


I will never stop loving you.
[Post New]10/14/2016 14:28
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I hope your ex is getting custody of the kids op. Doesn't sound like you have time to give them any thought.


And maybe this will hurt his custody chances in his eventual divorce. Not that you give a crap.
[Post New]10/14/2016 14:40
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Anonymous
I don't understand why are you trying to cut this off. You are now divorced and apparently you still love him and maybe he loves you, too. You have nothing to lose. It's not upon you to save his marriage.
[Post New]10/14/2016 16:25
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ZachF
Member Offline
You love him but you decided one day to completely blow up his whole life and nearly destroy his marriage? Sorry, you are a crazy bitch. I'm not judging you for the affair at all, just how you handled it.

He knows you are a crazy bitch who can't be trusted. He knows you could, and in fact have caused him a huge amount of grief with his wife who has stuck by him after your moment of selfish revelation. But, he's reaching out to you again?

Honey, that isn't out of love. Only a man equally as crazy as you would love someone so malicious and untrustworthy. That's the little head doing all the thinking.

Hey, if the sex was great and you want more, the go for it.
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