Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So let's say you meet someone online...then you both agree to go out and so you do.
Now, it'e bill time. I'm a male, date didn't go well. I had no connection, was bored didn't like her personality. So the check comes, she said "let's pay for our portion" and kinda does the whole alligator arms thing. I'm like okay...you owe 20 bucks.

She seemed shocked. But she paid, we left and I went up to meet friends because frankly the date sucked.

I get a message the next day about how she was nervous and apologized. I figure sure, nerves take over sometimes, let's try this again. But she mentioned she was a little shocked I actually made her pay for her portion and that guys usually pick up the check. No second date lady. First off, date sucked. Second, pay for your own stuff. Third, self entitlement is a turn-off.

I asked a few friends (male and female) but got mixed responses.

Her part was $20 and you made her pay?! You suck. I'd be embarrassed to ask for $20. I'm a waitress, I would pay for both of you 2 the hell out of my section. I could get my table back and maybe have people there who will cough up a payment card or cash and won't sit there fighting about it and playing alligator.
It can't be about money. She offered to pay her share, which is nice really and fair and you can't see that it's only $20?!
If you both need money, we are hiring all the time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't mind paying for my own meal if the date sucked and I have no plans to see a guy ever again. I'm not sure I would go on a second date with a man who made me pay for my own meal though.

I agree with this. The less I like a guy, the more likely I am to pay for myself. If I don't plan to see him again, I'll insist harder on paying my part.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So let's say you meet someone online...then you both agree to go out and so you do.
Now, it'e bill time. I'm a male, date didn't go well. I had no connection, was bored didn't like her personality. So the check comes, she said "let's pay for our portion" and kinda does the whole alligator arms thing. I'm like okay...you owe 20 bucks.

She seemed shocked. But she paid, we left and I went up to meet friends because frankly the date sucked.

I get a message the next day about how she was nervous and apologized. I figure sure, nerves take over sometimes, let's try this again. But she mentioned she was a little shocked I actually made her pay for her portion and that guys usually pick up the check. No second date lady. First off, date sucked. Second, pay for your own stuff. Third, self entitlement is a turn-off.

I asked a few friends (male and female) but got mixed responses.

Her part was $20 and you made her pay?! You suck. I'd be embarrassed to ask for $20. I'm a waitress, I would pay for both of you 2 the hell out of my section. I could get my table back and maybe have people there who will cough up a payment card or cash and won't sit there fighting about it and playing alligator.
It can't be about money. She offered to pay her share, which is nice really and fair and you can't see that it's only $20?!
If you both need money, we are hiring all the time.

Anonymous wrote:never went on a second date with a guy who didn't pay on the first date (although usually first dates are just coffee [especially if meeting online], I see no need to spend extra money AND time on someone you barely know). I'm not cheap, and no way I would date a cheap guy. Also, if you couldn't pay for the date then don't go on the date.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So let's say you meet someone online...then you both agree to go out and so you do.
Now, it'e bill time. I'm a male, date didn't go well. I had no connection, was bored didn't like her personality. So the check comes, she said "let's pay for our portion" and kinda does the whole alligator arms thing. I'm like okay...you owe 20 bucks.

She seemed shocked. But she paid, we left and I went up to meet friends because frankly the date sucked.

I get a message the next day about how she was nervous and apologized. I figure sure, nerves take over sometimes, let's try this again. But she mentioned she was a little shocked I actually made her pay for her portion and that guys usually pick up the check. No second date lady. First off, date sucked. Second, pay for your own stuff. Third, self entitlement is a turn-off.

I asked a few friends (male and female) but got mixed responses.

Her part was $20 and you made her pay?! You suck. I'd be embarrassed to ask for $20. I'm a waitress, I would pay for both of you 2 the hell out of my section. I could get my table back and maybe have people there who will cough up a payment card or cash and won't sit there fighting about it and playing alligator.
It can't be about money. She offered to pay her share, which is nice really and fair and you can't see that it's only $20?!
If you both need money, we are hiring all the time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Female here. I always offer to split and I've had mixed responses.. I'd say 75% of guys insist on paying after I offer, and 25% say okay great and we each just throw in our cards.

I'm with another PP.. I'm uncomfortable with not paying half.

I wouldn't even request she pay half, just what she had

What if what she had was more than half?

Then pay your portion, you're a big girl, out in your big girl pants

Anonymous wrote:I strongly believe the man should pay for the first few dates. I always offer to pay half regardless of my expectation, but no one has ever allowed me to do so. After the first few dates, both should be paying. It is kind of ridiculous to always expect the guy to pay for everything, especially if you both are hardworking adults. The men I dated and been in relationships with have always noted they respected me moe for picking up tabs on subsequent dates.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I strongly believe the man should pay for the first few dates. I always offer to pay half regardless of my expectation, but no one has ever allowed me to do so. After the first few dates, both should be paying. It is kind of ridiculous to always expect the guy to pay for everything, especially if you both are hardworking adults. The men I dated and been in relationships with have always noted they respected me moe for picking up tabs on subsequent dates.

You contractor yourself! If men are paying for the first few dates, that can add up quite a bit. If you go out with a lot of different men just 2 or 3 times, you are getting a lot of free meals. Equal pay, equal pay!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I strongly believe the man should pay for the first few dates. I always offer to pay half regardless of my expectation, but no one has ever allowed me to do so. After the first few dates, both should be paying. It is kind of ridiculous to always expect the guy to pay for everything, especially if you both are hardworking adults. The men I dated and been in relationships with have always noted they respected me moe for picking up tabs on subsequent dates.

You contractor yourself! If men are paying for the first few dates, that can add up quite a bit. If you go out with a lot of different men just 2 or 3 times, you are getting a lot of free meals. Equal pay, equal pay!