Do European or south American U-little kids play sharks & minnows?

I doubt it. They are surrounded by soccer all the time – at home, with siblings, with neighborhood kids, at school. In a lot of other countries, I don't think they even play a lot of those "introduction to soccer" games - the kids are just constantly on the ball and develop their skills that way. If they do play these games, its minimal I would think. By age 5, boys are watching their favorite teams on TV and know the names of the star players.

what do you do when you believe a 5-yo girl on your team is truly gifted? what if any advice would you give to her parents?

Get her year-round training at least once a week, preferably with a coach who works with U9 girls teams and has a good reputation. Sign her up for whatever the training the U7’s are doing at your club. Maybe play one age group up in the rec league. Pay for the training. Volunteer coaching is great, but professionals are professionals. The best professional coaches I know that can really develop players are the ones who can capably teach skills to the 4-5 year olds, not just babysit them with preschool-like games.

What do you do when you see signs of potential emotional abuse by parents?

Is this on a travel team or a rec team? If a rec team, just leave it alone. If a travel team, maybe the kid is not really ready or needs to be moved to a lower team where the level of the team is slightly less competitive or has a more laid-back atmosphere. As a coach its not your job to fix the parent. You can always talk to the dad 1 on 1, but that doesn’t mean you will fix the problem.

Coach - is there any reason a Kindergarten team's coach is keeping the scores and posting them on the club's website? I thought it's pretty standard practice everywhere that no scores are kept for K/1st/2nd graders, but perhaps there's a reason to?
There is absolutely no reason to. Kids that are more athletic 5/6-year olds or whatever and actually know how to play soccer will crush kids that are less physically developed. If one kid has any form of speed, kicking power, and even a little game awareness and the other team doesn’t, its game over before the game has been played.

Hi coach: My kid absolutely loves soccer, and is good at it but not great. Kid is 8 and wants to do better. They are at silver level for Arlington travel. Where would they learn the most? Doing travel, developmental, or just rec? I have heard the only travel teams worth being on are red/white so the silver/gold isn't worth the money. On the other hand, I have heard kids on travel can improve greatly and move up. Similarly, I have also heard ADP is a good middle ground between rec and travel, but have also heard ADP is a waste of money and if a kid isn't on travel they wont improve their game on ADP. So confused!

You will learn the most in travel with a dedicated coach year-round. Get on the Silver team and look for a good local trainer (use CoachUp) who can work with your player. Unfortunately, the best coaches are assigned to the higher teams, and while there are exceptions (sometimes you get a really good coach at the lower levels), it doesn’t mean they are good at developing players. Your son/daughter can LOVE the coach, have a fun/memorable experience and want to come back the next year, but it doesn’t equate to developing their ability level. This is why I would recommend finding someone local and paying for training once a week.

Do kids need to be taught to not kick the ball with their toes, if so at what age? or is this something they'll figure out naturally as they grow?

They do not figure it out naturally as they grow, they have to be taught. Soccer incorporates a lot of body movements that are not naturally learned. This question is like “do kids need to be taught how to shoot a basketball correctly instead of lobbing it”. There are many ways to strike the ball (passing/shooting) and it all is taught, not automatically learned.

U9 DS currently plays on a a talented competitive team but only gets to play about 15 minutes per game on avg while a few play almost the entire game. Just tried out for a super small club, super close to home, and was offered a roster spot right after the first day. The coach and training on his current team is great but I feel his confidence has dipped over this last spring due to some of discouraging teammates and his dwindling playing time. Trying to figure out if switching is the right choice for my kid. I feel the training situation is great and competitive but is it worth it at the expense of his confidence?

Can you move down to the next lower team within your age group? I would do that. If that’s not possible or if there isn’t one, switch to a team where your son is right in the middle of the pack, not at the bottom. It’s not enjoyable there when the other boys are very pushy. Get your son some 1 on 1 lesson to improve. Does your club have a policy about playing time? At most clubs, players at U9/U10 MUST play at least 50% of each game, with the exception of tournaments. 15 minutes per game is low and many clubs would not allow that at U9.
Thanks for your input. I wouldn't call it straight up bullying otherwise I would have taken action. It is just the constant dealing with whining/complaining teammates that can make him second guess his decisions when on the ball now (i.e. always looking for the pass first and taking to much time when the obvious decision is to dribble into open space). Not sure what you mean by "not being neutral in this scenario" comment.

The other kids are being pushy with him because likely, his playing level is a half a level below that of his teammates. If it were a full level below, he wouldn’t be on the team in the first place. Does your club have a lower tier team below this one? It will be more of the same, unless your player improves to some degree outside of practice, or if you move to the next lower team where the players will probably be at his exact same level. Boys will quickly identify that another player is slightly below their level and will gang up on the kid, making life difficult. That affects the player’s confidence, which starts spiraling downwards into other areas.

Which program would you recommend for the best development for a talented U10 boy? High Arlington team now but unsatisfied with the program. Are there any smaller programs that focus on skills development near Arlington?

Mclean, Alexandria

New to travel soccer with a question for the coach: I am not even sure what kinds of questions to ask! My son was just offered a place on Stoddert's U11 white team (I assume that this is their "C" team). Do you know whether players are able to move from a C to a B team, say, during a season? I imagine that it depends on the club, but do you have a general sense of this? And my other question is whether there is a qualitative difference for a player, in terms of skills development, training, attention from coaches, etc., between an A, B, or C team? My son says he is serious about soccer and loves the game. He has the option of playing travel with two other clubs and we're trying to decide which one to go with. There are other factors (like commuting time), but for right now I'm just trying to get a handle on the differences between playing on the first, second, or third team at a club in travel soccer. Thanks!

I don’t know DC Stoddert specifically, but here is my take:
A teams – almost always have the “overgrown” early growth spurt kids who can already play well, usually very athletic. A teams at U11 that can play well will mow the grass with teams who are not as athletic, even skilled ones. Also, you find the most talented kids in the age group here.
B teams – have the “normal sized” kids with the good ability, usually are decent players, but don’t play the game at the speed of the A team.
C teams – usually the late developer kids, or the less athletic ones that still have ability. You tend to see players on C teams who have obvious holes here or there in their technical ability, but are still good enough to be a competitive team against others at the same level, and still head and shoulders above a recreational player the same age.

Coach I had a question to get your input on. I have boy currently playing U9 travel with BRYC. With their move to ECNL they will no longer be in a league at the younger ages (u13 and below) and plan on replacing the weekend games with scrimmages which I assume can only be with their teammates since the other clubs will be in a league. I understand the games aren't training, however, we left rec for more competitive play and I am concerned he might get bored. Do we stick out with the same club or look for alternatives? Not really considering options long term since he could change sports or no longer be interested in the future.

Find the best developer of U9 players you can find and stick with that coach – if it happens to be the coach at BRYC, then stay. If it happens to be at another club, then go there.
Coach! Where have you been? Question for you. How much do you think is an appropriate rate to pay for individual training per hour? How much would you charge?

It all depends on who you are hiring. Look through CoachUp – www.coachup.com

Here are my per hour rates for 1 on 1’s:
U8 and younger: $40-50, depending on how young
U9-U12 - $65
U13+ - $100
These rates are on the high end, but, I’ve been coaching for a long time, I know what I am doing, I have a track record, and I only have limited amounts of time per week for 1 on 1’s when I could actually have time off instead. Higher prices also weed out the people that are not that serious about soccer and have a more casual approach – if you want something lower key, there are other people out there for that who will train your player. You also have to factor in that 1 hour session requires the coach to drive out to the field and back as well as set up for the session, so it takes more time.

Would we develop more elite golfers if all of the greatest US athletes chose golf?

Not necessarily. They would still have to become a great golfer in addition to becoming a great athlete. You still have to become a great golfer to be a great golfer.

There are only so many hours in the day - how many hours do you devote to improving pure athleticism and how many to improving your skills?

Bottom line is if you have average skills, no amount of athleticism can make up for that.

Same with soccer - you can be incredibly athletic, but you still have to develop the skills of a great soccer player to be a great soccer player. And you cannot do this without spending more time with the ball (not in the weight room or on the track)


In soccer, the reason for this is that the ball moves faster than the players - the greatest sprinter cannot outrun a soccer ball on a sprint. The greatest endurance athlete cannot outrun a soccer ball over 90 minutes. The greatest high jumper cannot jump higher than a ball can be kicked. Athleticism will help with some types of game situations, but your skill on the ball will have more of an effect on the outcome. There are 22 players on the field and only 1 ball, so a lot of the game is about timing, team shape, principles of play such as width, support, coordinated movements, and transitions. These elements of team play have very little to do with individual athleticism. In fact, one strategy when playing against athletic players that want to pressure is to wear them out by passing the ball around the field and make them chase it all over the place.

Most of the game is played without you having the ball at your foot - and when you do get it, you only play with 1-2 touches most of the time. The thousands of hours working on your touch determine how good those 1-2 touches are. NO amount of time training athletic qualities without a soccer ball at your feet will improve the quality of those touches. You need to train with a ball.

There's a reason I didn't try to go play their sport... because it doesn't cross over. That's my point here - athleticism does not mean you are good at another sport. With all the athleticism that a soccer player has, you still can't dribble a basketball well or shoot accurately.

My point here is that the motor skills required to play soccer and other team sports do not cross over very well. The closest thing out there is NFL kickers.

This is why the American audience doesn't appreciate or understand the sport as much, the thought process behind it is different - it's a totally different game than the sports most people have grown up with.

To the U8 parent - I know Maryland well and if you are in Anne Arundel county, the cause of having to drive for travel soccer 50% because its travel soccer, and 50% because you live in Anne Arundel County.

If you lived on the Eastern Shore of MD, you would have to drive 30 - 60 minutes just to get to a mall, unless you live in Salisbury. On the eastern shore, a lot of competitive sports go across MD and DE boundaries, and all the way up and down the Delmarva peninsula.

Just to compete against better teams in tournaments, they have to "cross the bridge" or go up to Dover / Philly. You are lucky enough to already live "over the bridge" - so you have it better than a lot of people, trust me.


This is what I tell people -

If your son/daughter is actually good enough to be part of a travel team (and they are enthusiastic), sign on for 1 year. Worst case scenario, they don't like it and you can leave after the year is up. If they still want to play without all of the commitment, you can find a weekly skills clinic locally or if the rec league offers some type of supplementary training during the season, plus there are summer soccer camps everywhere these days. Being part of a more committed team is a big deal for the kids and it helps their social development, confidence, and many other things if the program is run well.

Hey, if they go back to the rec league after 1 year of training, they should be one of the better players, or at least contribute to their team more, which will be a confidence booster.

After 1 year, if your child really didn't like the experience, then at least you know for certain instead of not signing up based on preconceived notions about over-the-top parents and coaches.



The purpose of U9 soccer is developmental. The purpose of U10, U11, and U12 is still developmental, even though it gets a little more competitive each year.

Once U13 hits, it starts to be a more competitive environment (even though its actually supposed to be developmental, because a 12 year old is not a finished product).



If a child is capable of learning in a school setting, then they should be capable of learning to play a sport.

Why do we send kids to pre-school? b/c it preps them for kindergarten. Why kindergarten? preps for elementary.... preps for middle school.... preps for HS... preps for college... preps for the real world


We could argue that pre-school or kindergarten is unnecessary and a waste of time to drive them to and from school every day, because the kids are too young to do anything academic. But, it's obvious that they learn and develop during those years. Same with the mini-kicks soccer programs, U8, or whatever - except parents don't really know what improvement looks like because they may not have any experience with the sport. This is why asking questions on a board like this is a good thing and what coaches are here for - to answer your questions.

lol if you have no foot skills and have never manipulated a soccer ball with your foot while someone else is trying to take it away form you, it doesn't matter how great of an athlete you are, unless you are a goalkeeper.

That's like saying soccer players are great endurance athletes, so a few of them would make good basketball players. They have no hand-eye coordination whatsoever if you give them a basketball because they haven't been exposed to it.

It takes thousands of hours to develop the foot skills you need at the pro level, starting from a very early age.

A great athlete is a great athlete, but athleticism alone with zero skill will get you roasted when you play with skilled players that are average athletes. All you can do is defend, but the ball can always "outrun" players - meaning the ball can always be passed faster and be moved around the field more quickly than anyone can catch up with it. You also have no clue what is happening around you - small group tactics, attacking and defending as a group, and all the techniques involved in striking a moving ball with all the surfaces of your feet.



When I was in college, I'd practice and play pick-up soccer indoors in our campus rec center over the winter months when most students were on vacation, and there was always a group of basketball players there who were the best on campus outside of the varsity athletes. They were great athletes, and type A macho guys who had to let everyone know they were the kings of the court.

They'd see a few of us doing all these skills with the ball and occasionally one of them would wander over and "try" to play in our game to prove he could dominate, but he would basically embarrass himself and look completely ridiculous trying to control a soccer ball while decked out in full basketball gear, shoes and everything. The first instinct was always toe ball as hard as possible.

They were so uncoordinated with the soccer ball, especially trying to juggle. To this day it is one of the funniest things I have ever seen.

I mean, you can ask the coach if your son can be a development player and just train with the team and be an alternate if they need an extra person at tournaments of it short-handed for a game but not officially be "on the team". Maybe you just pay training fees.

You have to ask these questions to the coach.

I think it all comes down to the coach - if the coach is good at communicating to the parents and letting them know the benefits and the required commitment, they can find a balance.

Some players and families are ready to jump into the deep end with travel soccer, but a lot of very high potential players (and their families) need to be eased into it one step at a time.

There are a LOT of U8's out there that show potential that unfortunately miss out on the opportunity to at least train with a travel team and see the results because coaches and clubs are too black or white about it (either YES you're on board or NO you're not).

Travel teams at U9 usually play 9-game seasons, either 4 or 5 home games and 4 or 5 away games.

If you don't like the drive for the away games, then just arrange for a carpool with another family for those, the kids will have fun.


Would you mind telling us where you live, what part of VA? That will help a lot.

OK soccer coach (and uber-parents) - please help me understand the whole point of travel soccer. I would understand getting together the top, say 5% of players in an area and forming a team with them and having them compete against other similar teams. And those teams would probably need to be further away to create the top level of competition. So I get why travel soccer started.

BUT... that doesn't seem to be the case now. Now, it's the top 1/3 or more of kids in any given club that is on the "travel" team. So there are more than enough teams to have a county-by-county similarly competitve league.
We are currently in a U8 county league. Team is doing well - only one loss, but no blow outs. The competition is fine. The coach is planning to move to NCSL for U9. Likewise, most of the other top teams in the county league are moving to travel too. So now everyone is paying more money, just to drive further to play teams that are the same as the ones we could find in our own county.

Why the racket? What's the real benefit to the kids? Why not competitive county-wide (for example) leagues?

DS won't be trying out for the U9 travel team this year. My idea of a fun family day isn't traveling 1.5 to watch a bunch of 8 year olds play slightly above average soccer for 40 minutes.
To hear his coach say it, we've just doomed him to never play good soccer in his life. Sigh.




Alright, I'll do my best with this question. This is pretty common - many parents have signed their kids up for soccer programs all the way through 4/5/6/ and its all about fun, exercise, the kids getting to run around, be social, learn a few skills, and play 3v3 or 4v4 soccer games in the local neighborhood with families they all know and other kids that go to the same school. It's all great fun for the player and for the family.


Then, U-8 arrives and all of a sudden there are extra training programs to sign up for, skills clinics, coaches wandering around taking mental notes of talented, skilled, or more athletic players, etc. Your player is being evaluated informally. The reason for this is that clubs form travel teams every year for U9, and the main source of players are the current U8's.

Why do travel teams exist? Because there are leagues, coaches, and organized soccer clubs to put them together. Why do those exist? Because US Soccer has been making grass roots initiatives to teach coaching courses in every state, even reaching out to rural areas so the quality of soccer education improves. Then players improve, and eventually the national teams improve, which is why this is all happening. There are also enough kids that want to participate, and enough parents that can pay fees for it. All of this is being driven by the fact that soccer is much more accessible than it was to the average Joe than in the 90's, when there was very little, if any exposure to international soccer in the US. Now you can just youtube and see all of the famous players, Barcelona, English Premier League, and anything you want.

The great thing about soccer is that the barrier to entry is very low - all you need is a ball and a place to play. This is why millions of kids around the world play it. There are also few genetic qualities that help you in soccer, other than maybe speed - so its more merit-based around how much time and effort you have put into training and playing the game, rather than just being a "stronger/bigger/faster kid" only. A "faster kid" with no foot skills will just run themselves out of breath.


So here's the logic behind a "travel" team -
At U8 and below, a parent volunteers to coach the kids on game day, and maybe run 1 or 2 practices a week. The parent is an unpaid volunteer.



If your son/daughter were in school, would you want an unpaid parent volunteer as their teacher? It would be outrage. Teachers in schools are required to be certified and meet certain standards, or they cannot teach.

Track an 8 year old with an unpaid volunteer teacher who is doing it for the first time and an 8-year old with a professional teacher (with 5-10 years of full-time teaching experience) after a year and see how they progress.

After a year, those kids are at 2 very different levels. Putting them in the same classroom would be hard because they need different curricula to be challenged.


This is the same in soccer - when kids start receiving professional training (if the coach / trainer knows what they are doing), after 1 or 2 full seasons, the teams are on completely different levels.
I'll give you an example - typically, "travel" players are selected based on TIPS - technique, insight, personality, and speed. There are other posts here that go into what those mean in more detail.

When you take the top, say 12 kids out of a pool of 60 playing U8 recreation, you could look at it as an "all-star" team, or whatever. Some clubs do that and then they play against other recreational "all-star" teams at the end of the season.

If that "all-star" team played against a standard recreational team (with no "all star" players), its a complete massacre and not fun for anyone to watch.

Now, after those kids have been selected for travel and received professional training for a season or two, you really can't even put them on the same field with a rec team anymore. This is why rec tournaments don't allow travel teams, and travel tournaments don't allow rec teams - there is too much of a difference in playing level.



As an example, the club I coach for has an informally run U-8 team where kids are invited onto and they play against other clubs a few times in the spring. One team we have played had a group of kids that have not had any professional training, but have just played "backyard soccer". It was really, really bad. Our team scored within the first 15 seconds, and after 4-0 within 3 minutes, some of their players started crying. We pulled the goalie and a field player off and made our kids complete 10 passes before scoring, can only play with your left foot, and all of these restrictions to even the game up. And with that, it was still terribly lopsided. Our kids were getting frustrated that they could not play "real" soccer at their level, and the other team had kids crying.

So that's why we have it - because kids that have higher ability levels to begin with start getting professional training, they get even better, and then they need players at their own level to play and compete against.
It doesn't mean you should be giving your life up for it. The most important part is the training. Lost time is lost time.


A word of caution - here's what happens during the fall of U9 - after the travel team has been selected after the spring U8 season, all of the best players are picked out of the recreational league, and then the talent gets watered down.

If your player is very good, he/she could end up scoring all the team's goals and not be challenged, and therefore not improve much. You see this more on the girls side. On the boys side, the kids have the athleticism to cancel out stronger players.


After a year or two of missing out on professional training, it becomes harder and harder to join a more competitive team later because the training curriculum is above the level that your player is.


Again, its the same as a school classroom - if you select a group of advanced math students, put them in the same class together, and then give them the best math teacher in the school, they are going to be far ahead of the rest of the kids in 1-2 years. If an average student is signed up for the class right at the beginning, they can still catch up with a lot of effort, but the window starts to close as time goes by.



Just find what you think is the best fit for your son/daughter. There are plenty of intermediate options if you are not ready to commit to a travel team, but your player still enjoys the sport and wants to improve.

I do not worry about U6's bunching up. They only play 3v3 anyway.

You can't expect kids to stop bunching up until they learn passing technique, and understand that in order to make passes, they have to spread out.

Just saying "spread out" 100x does nothing. They have to know WHY. There are plenty of fun passing exercises / games that you can do, and then its obvious to them that making a 1-foot pass has no benefit.

You can also start to have them pass in triangles, 3v0 and eventually 3v1. I've been able to get U7's to understand it, U8's can really start to move the ball around if reinforced, and U9's (if taught properly) can actually play 3v1 and 4v2 possession games. They just have to be taught the right way. It does break down on game day sometimes, so you still have to reinforce it over and over again in practice.

Hi Coach...as a coach/trainer, what are some of the better clubs to coach for? Why do you stay at your current club? Do you think it's important for a club to set a curriculum and all the teams adhere to it pretty closely or should coaches/trainer have a lot of independence?


A "better club" to me just means that the people making the important "soccer decisions" are actually qualified to do so. People that are experienced in soccer understand that all decisions need to be made in the best interests of the players. A good club is one where people are actually qualified to hold the positions they have and make the decisions they make.

Some coaches are more comfortable working independently and mostly being left to do their own thing, and some like being part of a large club where they coach several teams. It's all individual preference.

Having a Technical Director that wants you to succeed is important... not someone who keeps track of all the things you've unknowingly done wrong in their head and then surprises you with a list one day out of the blue. If you make a mistake, they let you know right away and don't make it personal.

Also not having parents that go around your back with their complaints up the chain of command, with the club president or the county recreation department for whatever the grievance is.

The biggest source of parent complaints that go on in the background (at least at younger ages) usually come from tryouts, the A/B/C team splits and the movement between teams, especially as parents are overprotective and stressing about their kid's future. ESPECIALLY in tight-knit areas of northern VA where everyone knows everyone else in their "burb" because they all live next door to each other, their kids have all played on the same rec teams for years, and everyone is in each others' business.

Also working with players that challenge your own coaching ability because you can test their limits, and a talent pool that allows your team/s to be competitive at least within the DC area.

Knowing that there are other good coaches also and colleagues you can chat with or do other things with off the field once in a while. Opportunities to work summer camps, offseason programs, etc and having freedom to do different things.

Being able to stay with the same team for as long as you choose to as long as its a fit and not being forced to move to a different team after U9-U10 when you have built the players up from raw talent into up and coming players.

A club should set a curriculum for training programs for non-travel players from U9-U12ish ages (and younger), but age group coaches should have the freedom to do as they want if they are good enough to design their own sessions. Age group coaches should be experienced enough to do that on their own. Different age groups have different starting points and it is not a one-size-fits-all curriculum for travel.

I stay because I like the people I work around, have a good relationship with the parents, TD, kids, other coaches, its a club that doesn't have ultra-high expectations attached to its name but still has been around for a while has a good reputation and is large enough to put together good teams but not a lot of bureaucracy. Plus I have built up a group of players that I like and want to continue with. Switching clubs is a hassle and you only do it if you really have to or if there is a career opportunity too good to pass up on.

No club is perfect, whether you are a coach or parent, its just a matter of what +/- tradeoffs you can accept. If you are in one place for a while, at least you know what the negatives are and can hopefully live with them.

When you switch clubs, you get a whole new different set of negatives to deal with that you can never see from the surface. At least if you are in the same place for a while, you can work around the negatives as you figure out what they are, so you can focus on why you are there in the first place, which is to develop players and make a difference for your kids. As a coach working year-round with the same players, you are a very influential adult in a kid's life, after their parents.

It will help if she is a goalkeeper.

As a field player, technique, decision making, mental toughness, and speed of play are more important

Also pulling out of leagues saves thousands of dollars on fees for U9-U12. Maybe BRYC will charge less or the $ will be allocated to the older age groups for something.

To me it seems like BRYC will have 2 separate programs... U13 and older and U12 and below.

U12 and below will see a good number of players migrate to other clubs and then come back for U13 tryouts. The U12 and below will be a benefit to BRYCs ODSL players and those lower down on rosters since they get bumped up but I dont see their most talented players (parents, really) sticking around at younger ages without actual games.

U13 tryouts will be quite large.

In a league, everyone takes it more seriously and i think the players benefit. There is a place for scrimmages, but losing a "real" game has lessons for the kids just as much as winning does. Kids need to experience the emotions of winning, losing, and tying games other than just "oh well that was just a scrimmage". Leagues also provide a regularity of opponents, with some being easy, hard, or evenly matched.

So BRYC essentially will have 2 completely different programs, U12 and below and U13 and above. Playing U12 at BRYC may not prepare you for the level of play at U13 when some of the best talent in the area shows up at tryouts.

So i think the U9-U12 age groups will really get watered down in terms of talent but that wont matter because the U13 tryout should have plenty of it.

That is correct. From what I have heard, the scrimmage only trend has started in england among big-name youth academies at younger age groups whose coaches felt the pressure to win every single game because of their name brand.

Like man united, arsenal, etc has U9 and U10 teams and there is a lot of pressure on those kids to win games because of the club they play for. So scrimmaging makes sense in that case because they are aiming to develop future professionals out of already elite elite youth players that have already been identified and scouted out of literally thousands of boys.

Im not sure if that translates well to the US just yet. I believe BRYC is trying to follow suit in that way but I dont think pulling teams out of leagues is going to be a magic pill that somehow makes all of the players better.