Embarrassed by college choice?

[Anonymous]

In our hyper competitive environment, are you embarrassed by or disappointed in where your child ended up going to college? Did you hope for something better? If so, how are you adjusting your dreams/expectations to your reality?

[Anonymous]

My kid didn't get into the Ivy they applied to. They are at a place that, frankly, is a better fit. Couldn't be happier for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid didn't get into the Ivy they applied to. They are at a place that, frankly, is a better fit. Couldn't be happier for them.

That's not an answer to OP's question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid didn't get into the Ivy they applied to. They are at a place that, frankly, is a better fit. Couldn't be happier for them.

That's not an answer to OP's question.

“Couldn’t be happier” doesn’t sound embarrassed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid didn't get into the Ivy they applied to. They are at a place that, frankly, is a better fit. Couldn't be happier for them.

That's not an answer to OP's question.

NP here. I think it was an answer to OP's question. OP asked "are you embarrassed by or disappointed in," and the response was clearly a "no." Is a "yes" the only responsive answer?

[Anonymous]

My child is just beginning the college process. Her reach schools are those that dcum would scorn as safeties. But she is autistic with several learning disabilities, and when she started high school I didn't think she would make it to college. So, no, I'm not embarrassed -- I'm thrilled.

[Anonymous]

No, I wouldn’t say embarrassed but sure, I’m disappointed. I’m glad he’s in college and looks like he might make it through to a degree (which is no small feat). I’m disappointed in myself as well for not being more on top of him and his grades and self-discipline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child is just beginning the college process. Her reach schools are those that dcum would scorn as safeties. But she is autistic with several learning disabilities, and when she started high school I didn't think she would make it to college. So, no, I'm not embarrassed -- I'm thrilled.

GL to your DD - so great! So much has changed since my older sibling with a developmental disability was a senior - decades ago.

Again, GL!

[Anonymous]

No my smart kid is at an Sec school and I’m proud.

My “not so smart” kid is at an Ivy because he is an athlete and it cracks me up. Getting in was the hardest part.

[Anonymous]

Much better options out of state.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I wouldn’t say embarrassed but sure, I’m disappointed. I’m glad he’s in college and looks like he might make it through to a degree (which is no small feat). I’m disappointed in myself as well for not being more on top of him and his grades and self-discipline.

do you think that would have made a difference? genuine question - i have a senior who struggles with focus.

[Anonymous]

No. I am not at all. My magnet high achieving kid chose UMBC over UMD. Both schools were pretty identical in what they offered but kid chose UMBC. Had an amazing college experience and amazing education. Best of all, really expanded his horizons and found really amazing friends who are also good people and driven. Thriving in a high paying STEM career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child is just beginning the college process. Her reach schools are those that dcum would scorn as safeties. But she is autistic with several learning disabilities, and when she started high school I didn't think she would make it to college. So, no, I'm not embarrassed -- I'm thrilled.

Good luck. My dc with a similar profile got into several schools (reaches) that dcum would consider unworthy of their tuition dollars. My dc is socially immature and with the combination of Covid decided to work and attend community college for now. But there are so many options now for our kids. I hope your dd finds her place.

[Anonymous]

OK, I'll bite. I wasn't disappointed in my kids' college choices because they all got into well known schools that DCUM would consider prestigious. Had they not, I would have been disappointed for sure and probably embarrassed. Kids around here have every advantage. To those who are given a lot, a lot should be expected.

I hate pampered, underachieving rich kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OK, I'll bite. I wasn't disappointed in my kids' college choices because they all got into well known schools that DCUM would consider prestigious. Had they not, I would have been disappointed for sure and probably embarrassed. Kids around here have every advantage. To those who are given a lot, a lot should be expected.

I hate pampered, underachieving rich kids.

Yikes.

Why do you assume rich = intelligence?

And why do assume kids who go to non-elite schools (i.e. most college students) are not hard-working?