Sleeping in on family vacation: what is reasonable?

[Anonymous]

With small children, I understand, but not that our granddaughters are 8 and 5, we are wondering what is reasonable on a family vacation. We rented two rooms at a lake resort for a long weekend, our treat. Breakfast service ends at 9, and for each morning, son and DIL emerge with the kids at 8:30 or even 8:40. Breakfast is rushed. One morning, they hadn’t even showered yet, so went back to the room for an hour after breakfast, so we get a late start on the day and miss out on activities.

What is reasonable? Tomorrow is last day and I don’t want to rush breakfast. Again.

[Anonymous]

That’s entirely reasonable. Not even a close call. It being your treat doesn’t give you power over their sleep schedule.

[Anonymous]

They are on vacation, and that's completely reasonable.

[Anonymous]

It is reasonable to go to breakfast on your own. Meet up together at 10. You sound horrible granny

[Anonymous]

You can eat breakfast whenever you like! Then sit and have another cup of coffee with them.

You want to eat? Eat. You want to take an hour? Do it. You don’t have to spend every second together.

[Anonymous]

Op, they don't feel rushed. This is what they want to do. And this is their vacation. "Miss out on activities" is not as important to them either, as it is to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is reasonable to go to breakfast on your own. Meet up together at 10. You sound horrible granny

I’m not horrible! I end up cutting food and fetching more juice instead of enjoying my own food half the time.

[Anonymous]

Maybe offer to take the two girls to breakfast with you at 8 and let their parents “sleep in.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can eat breakfast whenever you like! Then sit and have another cup of coffee with them.

You want to eat? Eat. You want to take an hour? Do it. You don’t have to spend every second together.

Being together is rather the point of a family vacation. But I do like your suggestion of DH and I eating first and just having coffee with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is reasonable to go to breakfast on your own. Meet up together at 10. You sound horrible granny

I’m not horrible! I end up cutting food and fetching more juice instead of enjoying my own food half the time.

Why don't you just eat at 8 and then sit with them with a cup of coffee at 840 when they get down?

[Anonymous]

pp again. Most important - you can not have a vision of how this vacation should be. Any vision you have is your vision. How you think it should go. What you think people should do, in order to have the best time. You have got to let this go.

IF - IF your mindset is altered by the fact that you paid for this weekend, that needs to change. If you aren't getting to experience activities you want to do (alone), you will need to make you can. But that's on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With small children, I understand, but not that our granddaughters are 8 and 5, we are wondering what is reasonable on a family vacation. We rented two rooms at a lake resort for a long weekend, our treat. Breakfast service ends at 9, and for each morning, son and DIL emerge with the kids at 8:30 or even 8:40. Breakfast is rushed. One morning, they hadn’t even showered yet, so went back to the room for an hour after breakfast, so we get a late start on the day and miss out on activities.

What is reasonable? Tomorrow is last day and I don’t want to rush breakfast. Again.

So you want them to wake their kids up earlier so that they aren't well rested for this day of activities?

[Anonymous]

I thought your post was going to say the grandkids are getting you up at 6 am! (Like my children!)

It sounds like you’ve provided a wonderful weekend for the family to rest and feel relaxed - it’s hard to remember what life is like with kids that age - but basically every other morning they are up early rushing around like lunatics getting kids to school and to activities. This has been one hell of a year on parents - you’ve given them a delightful weekend to relax and enjoy the lake It sounds like - great job!!

Let them sleep - it’s important - they don’t get to sleep in probably ever

[Anonymous]

If someone told me I needed to wake my kids up early so that we could have a long leisurely breakfast every day on vacation I'd look at them like they had 2 heads. Why exactly can't your grandkids sleep until their bodies are ready to wake up, while on vacation no less? Do you want their bodies and minds to be full of energy and excitement for the day of activities you seem to have in mind? Kids need sleep. Little kids who are active on vacation need even more sleep. What they DON'T need is an hour long breakfast that starts before their normal wake time, because they aren't grandparents, they are kids. Kids schedules and grandparents schedules rarely overlap the way you want them to.

[Anonymous]

Being together is rather the point of a family vacation

OP, also you need to accept that your barometer of "enough" time together may very well be different than theirs. Both parties liekly want things to go well. But they may know in their bones that x hours of togetherness is the right amount, and not y. More and they aren't at their best. Again, you can not and should not impose your will.

You aren't in charge. The sooner you accept that the better.