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Local writer quoted in WP saying that she "plays dumb" around SAHMs
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Anonymous
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I rarely wade into the WOHM/SAHM arguments, but this is so egregious that I have to comment. This is a direct quote from this morning's Washington Post magazine (p.5); it is also on the Slate "Double X website." Hanna Rosin is a local author. The quote is in its entirety from the magazine, so not out of context.
In answer to the question, "Is it ever okay to play dumb?" "Hanna Rosin: My terrible, horrible confession: I sometimes do it around stay-at-home moms, especially new moms, for fear that they have not, say, read the paper that day (or maybe that month) and will peg me as one of those Washington workaholic types who never sees her kids." Does she seriously think SAHMs haven't read the newspaper all month and that she has to "play dumb" around them? I am speechless. She obviously knows she is saying something insulting because she prefaces her comments with what a "terrible, horrible" comment it is. Yes, Ms. Rosin, it is. |
Anonymous
| Sounds like she thinks very highly of herself. Probably not rightly so. |
Anonymous
I don't take offense at all. She's scared of being judged and she clearly feels guilty for not bein around her kids like SAHM are 
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Anonymous
| Yeah, that was pretty dumb. |
Anonymous
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I can kind of understand it. When I go to the playground, all the Mom's talk about is what they saw on the View or Oprah that day. When the ladies of the View or Oprah say something, apparently to them, it is fact. That, or they gossip...I have yet to get any further than that with any of them.
Don't get me wrong, I am sure there are other SAHMs who don't talk about that stuff...I have just yet to meet them where we go to play. |
Anonymous
| I have a PhD, and when I was at home with DC for maternity leave I could not bother to read the newspaper--I wasn't "dumb," I was just exhausted. Perhaps the author would have been more sympathetic if she said that she did this based upon her own experience. Also, of course, if the article had not used the word "dumb" in the first place. |
Anonymous
Yes, but Rosin wasn't referring just to new moms--she specifically said "SAHMs" and then also included new moms as a different category, so it is clear that she wasn't referring to new moms on maternity leave, but SAHMs in general. |
Anonymous
I don't know where you live but I have never been a part of or overheard a conversation about the View or Oprah at the playground, that's ridiculous. When I try to engage a mom I don't know I am likely to talk about something superficial like their dd's cute shoes or the weather because I am not about to ask a stranger how they think the health reform vote is going to play out. As I get to know people of course we begin to talk about more interesting things- books, food, travel and politics. But that initial ice-breaking chit chat thing is hard, especially if the other party already has a bug up their butt about SAHMs being vapid. Roisin's comment was air-brained, but I hate the whole concept of that insipid DoubleX column in the WP magazine. It seems to be part of the magazine's semi-recent redesign, which overall tries too hard and sacrifices style over substance (like most of the Post these days, sadly). If it weren't for Siestema's column I would toss the magazine completely. |
Anonymous
| In those situations, Ms. Rosin isn't playing dumb, she's being dumb. |
Anonymous
Where do you live? I see comments like this frequently on DCUM and find it so surprising. In my four years as a SAHM, I have NEVER heard any other mom talk about Oprah or the View but lots of talk about politics, books, community, travel, culture, etc. Maybe my corner of the DC metro area is unusual. (Hyattsville/Mt. Rainier/Greenbelt/College Park) |
Anonymous
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I think as DCUM viewership has grown over the years, we have picked up a lot of parents from different times zones who use the non-DC-specific fora, like TTC or Expectant Moms.
Which is great and valuable, but I wish our new friends from Oklahoma and Wisconsin wouldn't also give their .02 about topics such as what to pay a nanny (in Oklahoma) or that it's stupid to send your child to private school for $28K because public schools are so great. At the parks I frequent as a SAHM in 20016, 20815 and 20015, no mothers ever, ever talk about The View. That would be like saying you feed your kid Cheez Whiz twice a day, every day. At the same point, I don't approach strangers with my meatiest topics right out of the starting gate. |
Anonymous
| OP, can you post a link to the article? |
Anonymous
| Hey Hanna, if the shoe fits ... |
Anonymous
| What's the alternative? Going to work with intelligent/stimulating adults and leaving your kids at home all day with someone who watches Oprah? That's what I found myself doing, and I realized it wasn't the best thing for my kids. The truth is that many (though not all) of the SAHMS in my circle in NOVA do not have my professional or educational background or intellectual interests. I do not enjoy the television programs they watch, the books they read, or the music they listen to, but we have our children and families to talk about, and they are genuinely nice people. I don't think of it as "playing dumb," I think of it as practicing humility and learning to find the best in everyone. |